My first 'shared' lock up period, my journey journal

First some factual information (I started an Excel file to keep track, as this time I want to seriously approach this)

• 8/5 last orgasm (kind of ruined it, could limit to sperm leaking, still with 2 small contractions however )
  
• 9/5 locked up in CB3K
• 14/5 after 5 disturbed painful nights, removed the CB3K, changed to discipline to withhold ejaculation
• 15/5 edged 2x, with some precum leaked, no "O" however
• 16/5 received my Holy Trainer V2 (HTv2) and put it on
• 17/5 I finally had the courage to talk to my wife and involve her = she reacted positive and supportive
• Milestone: I finally do not longer have to hide chastity for my wife
• 23/5 Introduced myself to CM, received some really nice reactions, advice - heart warming
• 26/5 again a massive erection attempt woke me up , was it yet another night rest disturbing one? NO: it was only 40' for my alarm clock was set, so I got up and consider this my first full undisturbed locked up night (a Milepebble?)

Overall:
- I'm so glad that I can share this with my wife now
- CM reactions are supportive, looks like I'm getting kind of hooked on this medium
- I'm raelly looking forward to this journey and first time my wife and I will have sex, curious what the difference will be after this build up period.
- Wife recovering good from surgery, so maybe first time will be within 1 or 2 weeks, I'm not going to ask, she will best know when she is ready for it.

today is my 18th orgasm free, and my 11th locked up day

time for me to go now, I have to get ready for the office.

 

Thanks. I realized that when reviewing my pics and avatar and spend most of my yesterday's spare time trying to compose a new avatar. My intention is to combine a couple of JPEG drawings and maybe one picture and make a new avatar out of that, but I misjudged: whereas most programs are kind of intuitive I find PhotoShop not so intuitive, so I just changed my avatar to one of my clothed pictures and changed settings from my other (personal) pictures to "people I followed" (*) only. (why is this option in the past sentence only?)

On the long term I must clean up my profile by the time my wife and I are ready to discuss her participation to this medium. (I said long term, as I do not want to ruin this journey and do not want to make the same mistake like years ago when she (looking back on that now: for obvious reasons) blocked the whole idea.

As said before allow us to take this journey step by step, no need for running.

reverting.

 

By the way, that underpants is not so oversized at all as it does not even cover all of the belt ... LOL (but it will not win any deign prices either, I must admit

 

deign = design

 

Thanks, I will keep that in mind.

But I want to report something:
tonight something wonderful happened: after dinner we watched the journal on tele and after that was done, I kissed her and said I was going downstairs for a smoke (In the house I only smoke in my home office) and she kissed me back so warm and that smile in her eyes...it really touched me.
By the time I arrived in my office and lit my cigarette I found myself still smiling a very big smile and feeling in the sky. (it reminded me of the feeling you get when as a teenager you get that first, short kiss from that special one when you accompanied her while waiting together at the bus station for her bus to arrive and she kissed you quickly before hopping on her bus when it arrived..
Makes sense: when I turn around the digits in my age, it makes 15. that's how I felt

 

Small update: last night I woke up again, this time far to early, so sat on the edge of the bed, took me a glass of water and very soon pressure decreased, went back in bed and I was lucky (she slept in the right position): I could spoon up to my wife for the rest of the night, a real warm and very nice feeling.

I feel I am getting hornier however (when we go to bed tonight it will be 19 days that I go without O. I know it probably is not much for most of you, but for me it is and I start to feel that... ).
Wife is recovering good, I still leave it up for her to decide when she's ready to share intercourse but, quid honestly, despite my earlier post, I wouldn't mind her being ready earlier than later ; I miss the "next" step, I do enjoy cuddling, spooning etc. but really look forward to when she is ready to go all in! (read: to have me go all in ).

When I confirmed today from the office by e-mail that I would join next Saturday to help mount the new dome on the roof of the local basket ball club (where our youngest son plays) I added at the end of the mail the quote of Franz Schubert (the one that I just installed as my signature here).

I just came home from the office and after the update on other people (mother, sister and mother in law etc.) we talked a bit about us and I said how I enjoyed last night's kiss and look in her eyes (mentioned in my post of yesterday above) and that the quote is how I feel myself now. Also told here that probably the 19 days start playing my hormones, and she said it could very well be, because she enjoy's very much that lately I give much more little kisses, hugs etc.,

I believe she starts to link my positive change to me being abstaining from masturbation (mind you: not that I was all that bad before, and I'm of course completely "objective" about this )

Yes, if that would be true (her linking one to another), then I definitely scored! I really love that woman!

To all I wish you a very good evening and night, I intend to do/have so!

 

21 days since last orgasm, 14 days locked up.
Last night 1x wake up, the night before no wake up, but that was a very short night.

The disturbed nights (although improving) start to show effects, I'm really tired. I hope my body will soon make the switch and let me sleep.

I'm proud of my achievement so far but for a first stint, it is maybe a bit long, want to come in and change tires but as it looks now, I will have to stay out on the track some longer, the mechanic is not ready yet to receive me in the pit.

She is recovering good but now that period of the month decided to join the race , so only thing I can do is to stay out and do my best on the track, hoping for the box box box! message. When is for the mechanic to decide. Strategy is decided in the pit, not by the driver.

Continue and see that I don't miss any curves , luckily I get lots of motivating messages from the pit.

 

Well the reason for me quoting myself my post doesn't seem to come quite obvious.

So let me just take the sentences where I changed something because of this morning I was not awake enough to get the right terminology.
corrected part:
1)
was: the mechanic is not ready yet to receive me in the pit
should be: the team manager is not ready yet to receive me in the pit
2)
was: When is for the mechanic to decide. Strategy is decided in the pit, not by the driver
should be: When is for the team manager to decide. Strategy is decided in the pit, not by the driver.
A unintended mistake :spank:

 

Last night (and also this morning) , I felt the happiest man in the world: we went to sleep quite late (unfortunately a habit of us) and after that I did my thorough cleaning (as agreed with my wife when I outed the cage) we cuddled in bed, were hugging so close and talking so sexy (well to me it seemed sexy but in fact we were just talking intimately about everything, did'n even mention much about me having the cage on).

We had only a couple of hours left before our duty at the local basket ball club for our voluntary commitment like mentioned earlier.

Because of the circumstances I was rock hard in my cage, right up to the pain level, and I asked her whether I could sleep the rest of the night without the cage. And she agreed and added: sure, as long as you don't play and you realize it is only to get a good sleep.

We were both too tired to talk about her remark, I just said what I felt at that moment and thanked her and told her how much I appreciate that she supports me in this chastity story.

Then I removed the cage and had a few good hours of sleep. This morning put my cage on again and when we hugged our morning hug, I believe she quickly felt whether I had it on again and she just smiled at me when she could feel it.

It was wonderful, decided to not make much of it, certainly not talked about the subject at that moment.

I just felt happy that she was getting more and more involved with the idea.

As said before: step by step.. and I believe this time my approach is the better one (compared with my miserable attempts years ago).

So, that is why I'm feeling really happy.

By the way: today is my 22nd day without O and 16th day in the HT.

 

Small update before I retire to bed:

I'm amazed and proud at the same time, I just started day 26 without O and 19th day in my HT.
I must say I didn't expect to be here at this point for my first stint.
I know the saying 'times fly when you're having fun', but am not sure whether that is actually applicable on my situation (unless the fun factor is actually the "not being able to have fun" element....could be...now that I think about it, that might very well be the case)

I hold on by the anticipation of how wonderful sex will be after such a long 'saving'.
Also told my wife that and she said she understood and especially liked the fact that she knew I wasn't masturbating any more, because she didn't like me doing that, said that she felt really good about this now.

My wife is getting slowly more and more in to this, although I would appreciate a bit of teasing now and then, that has so far been very, very limited. but then again she is of course still recovering a little form the surgery.
And we do more frequently and more intense cuddle and hug each other, and that is really a nice feeling

She told me that she is not ready for me humping up and down on her and I told here that I just would appreciate to be able to please her and to share her orgasm again as I really like sharing her orgasm, in whatever way. That I wanted her to know that she can decide when and in whatever way she wants to have sex or to be pleased...

She smiled gently, with a sexy wicked look in her eyes but then waived that idea away quite quickly by starting to talk about another subject, but I still keep hoping...

So yes, overall I'm very happy with where we are with chastity at this moment but I would love a little bit more action.

On the practical side: My wife agreed that when necessary for a good night rest, we remove the HT for the rest of the night.
Have done that on some occasions and didn't feel tempted to try cheat just because of being temporarily free.
I do keep the base ring in place because that makes it much easier in he morning to mount the HT again before I go downstairs.

Overall, I'm really happy so far but would certainly like a bit more action, desire some excitement for herself or maybe some teasing or...

I'm ready to do as asked, but she doesn't ask

 

First of all: I'm glad this site is on line again.

Friday night my wife and I started playing, but neither of us was really in the mood, I was longing for her orgasm but after some really nice playing we both stopped and went to sleep, she was not in the mood to cum, so I didn't either.
About the same happened on Saturday night

Sunday morning (my 30th day without O ) I gently woke her up (mind you it was almost noon time at that moment) and I started massaging her somewhat... I was free of the HT since the Saturday night.
She explained that she was not in the mood today neither to have an orgasm , so we cuddled a bit, and (much to my own surprise) I told her that when she did not want an orgasm, that is OK, that my need for her to orgasm is maybe bit selfish...

So we carried on and then she told me that she would watch while I would masturbate for her.

When I was finally almost cuming, I feld drops starting to fly around, without any orgasmic warning whatsoever, so I stopped a moment to look at my proud (well it it didn't get all that hard but anyway how else should I call my warrior after 30 days..) , and there it was, I managed this way to ruin my orgasm because when I sopped, my semen just dribbled out without any contraction or something. My wife and I both were surprised, I was even more surprised when I for one or the other reason did not try to 'save' the orgasm, I just saw it dribble out, and it was quite a big volume now laying on my tummy. Was this it, how could I not try to save that long lasted orgasm?

Am I so getting in to this chastity thing that a second nature decided for me to not want to make something out of it?
That I would be happy with only some cum oozing out? After such a long time?

I suppose it must be something like that, because I felt happy and proud in certain way, that I managed to avoid contractions

I'm locked up again since some time after that and when my wife felt later on the day in my crotch to check whether I was caged again, I felt happy and forgot about my earlier "not going all the way" Can you believe that? Happy because of not having a proper orgasm!

I can't describe this any better, but I think my mind is getting ready to fully adept to the chastity idea.

Yes, I think the next stint is going to become an even more interesting journey. Don't know for how much time this time, but I let that to her to decide

Just still hoping that my wife will be a bit more active in the teasing department, so far that is practically non existing but I will not put any pressure on her, I just want her to do and feel what she prefers.

Yeah, I think I'm getting hooked to this game.

 

@BlueEyes : I agree, it will take time, and that is exactly what I want to give my princess, no pressure, no stress..

But you know what!? Monday night (only some hours after above message and after some really nice cuddling and flirting on the couch) when I went up to bed and after washing and cleaning myself when I entered to bedroom, she was there in all her beauty that nature has given her inviting me to join her masturbating session..GREAT and what an unexpected delight!

She even joked a little and said how this must make it more difficult for me..I could only confirm and express how much I do like the way this was going!
Success, I count that as teasing

I really enjoyed her orgasm and the fact that I could join, that I could caress all strategic spots on her body and when she did orgasm that I was in the first row, the VIP seat so to say, to see and feel it all happen (well: the feeling aspect was with my mouth, hands and body, the rest was off limits (the HT remember!)).

When we went to sleep she felt so warm and relaxed, she fell a sleep while we were spooning and I was there close to my lovely wife.

At that moment I really felt in love and felt I was connected to her in a way that I didn't feel like since when we both were a few decades younger.

The HT proved to be worth it's money and didn't crack, although my body was testing the strength sure enough

What will the future bring..

Life is good!

 

Time for some update:
I continue this thread for one more stint in our chastity experience before I will no longer call it "my first shared.." and end with this thread.

So after my first 30 days, I'm now again at 13 days.

The flirting only increases and we feel both (yes: both, and I'm so happy about that) real good.

Yesterday evening, we were unexpectedly only the two of us in the house.

By the time I came home from the office, I saw my wife dressed up, the table set with a bottle of wine already opened, two glasses already filled with some of the wine and waiting for us. At that moment we cuddled and talked our usual daily subjects and she informed me we were without kids (well I should say without students, our boys being 19 and 21) and that got my immediate attention .

After dinner we went to the couch to watch some television, but in stead I massaged her head, neck and face for what must have been close to one hour and I saw and heard my wife completely relax and enjoy. Great.

During the film we afterwards looked at we were still in each other's arms on the couch like we were teenagers again , but it was Friday after a very demanding week at the office and we aren't teenagers any more, so I dozed to sleep midway the film.

When the film ended, I went downstairs to my office to smoke a cigarette before gong to bed. And started reading some mails etc. so I took a little bit more time than one cigarette, and there was my wife knocking at the door of my home office all being dressed up sexy (or should I say dressed 'down' ) smiling at me hugging and whispering in my ear that she felt sexy and wanted to climax. Now that got my attention of course , got up and when we were both in the bathroom getting ready for bed, I asked her how she would like to climax and I pointed at my cage which I was removing for a clean up. She just smiled at me and said she wanted to get off really quickly, so that I should not take to long to come over to the bed room and before she left the bathroom she looked at my cock and said with a teasing sexy voice: "I will not be needing that now, so you can put the cage back on when you cleaned it" and gave me a wicked smile and a wink.

Soon after I entered the bedroom to find my wife on the bed, dressed in a sexy torn (!) top exposing all her nice assets having her Tarzan vibrator in place and working... Wow, there she was: my "vanilla" wife in a torn top with a vibrator , I felt so horny and I assisted her to reach a big climax, this was so hot! When she had finished I caressed her whole body and we went in spooning modus when she said thank you, she had a wonderful orgasm and added wickedly: "Now I'm sure I will have a good sleep now", and with a teasing voice added, "I hope you will succeed in some sleep too!"

I couldn't get sleep right away (am sure you can imagine why not) and just thought how wonderful all this was evolving, how my vanilla wife was changing and how more she is becoming involved in this chastity play and how happy this makes me!
When having these thoughts I must have kind of grinned (with some noise) of joy because she heard it and asked what I was grinning about: I told her why and she replied she too was happy and then added: "now I don't count the days you are in again but I know you do, so how many days are you in again and how long was the first stint?"

I said 13 days now and last time was 30 days and she replied with a wink, a smile and a kiss: "oh, then you are not even halfway!" Now that made me hot: what a perfect little tease she was at that moment!

Whereas I thought my first stint to be exceptionally long because of circumstances, I realized that my second could probably be about the same amount of days.

future will tell!

to be continued.

 

Update: 21 days without O today

Yesterday evening, we were again only the two of us and made it a nice evening and night:

after dinner we cuddled a lot on the couch, I sat with her legs on my lap and we watched on tele a summary off the day on Rock Werchter , I massaged her feet and legs for a long time and sometimes my hands slipped upwards to more erotic zones . Really it happened by accident, I could not help it . I went downstairs to smoke a cigarette and after she finished what she quickly had to do downstairs she entered my office and massaged my shoulders and neck for a short while and when I turned towards her I saw that she changed into something more easy: a nice little summer dress without wearing anything underneath !

She encouraged me with a joke and made a gesture like I should "turbo smoke" that cigarette. Believe me, I did finish it very quickly and went upstairs again. We cuddled and hugged some more on the couch and besides her feet and legs I had free access to the other bits of her sexy body, and she didn't mind that at all .

Going back in time first:
I had during the week mentioned that I somehow felt left out without much attention to my locked up equipment and also gently said to her that I kind of missed some teasing....

Back to the present (yesterday evening):
Well, she whispered in my ear that we should go upstairs while referring to above mentioned talk earlier this week. She caressed my locked up parts, winked and said that she would toss a coin: "heads" would be my penis and "tails" would be her vibrator. She tossed, we had to put some extra light on to see ... and it was ... TAILS !

I was both excited and disappointed and she noticed that. On my request me tossed again and this time it was "heads".
I really felt like I cheated to get what I wanted :spank:

We went upstairs to the bath room to get ready and while showering I felt really bad about my cheating (kind of) earlier and after complete clean up I put the cage back on. When I exited the shower she saw I had put the cage back on and I saw her look questioning why I had put it on again.

I explained and said exactly what I felt: that I was kind of cheating on the play, and that I shouldn't have done that and therfore the first toss should have been the only one, so I locked my penis up again. I asked her if that was OK for her.

She kissed me, smiled and we went to play with her vibrator.... she came really hard and was exhausted after the play.

We went to spooning mode soon after and I felt frustrated because my penis did not get any action but at the same time was so happy about my own decision to undo my cheating earlier and that again I could enjoy one of her own orgasms.

I fell a sleep a little bit later than she did, but I really felt blessed and kind of proud of myself that I did undo my mistake in time, that I would have felt guilty when I would not have done that.

This morning when I got up, she said she would stay a bit longer in bed, and before I left the room, I showed her proud my locked status and she smiled, put up her thumb and said: very good: ten out of ten!

Yes, step by step we are both evolving in this play, what a wonderful wife I have!

 

@steele I have not yet introduced my wife to CM either, maybe I will but that can wait.
I've just her the writing of Sarah James "Be careful what you wish for" and I imagine that is quite something for my lovely vanilla wife.
She needs some time to digest...

 

day 34 just started and am feeling a bit down: because of all kind of daily obligations, she admitted to have only read a few pages of the book..I feel a bit disappointed about that, had hoped she would have read more by now

 

By the way, a practical question: do you see my chastity mansion ticker? To me it shows only some HTML code, not the ticker, unless I click on it and then it opens in a new page, I had hoped to have it in my signature

 

What do you mean with shot glass challenge? (I can imagine something with it, but am not sure)