Ideas?

you didnt mention cross-dressing. While that's not something I'm interested in with my husband, I know that many ladies and subbies find that a great avenue for degrading and humiliation.

One fun/sexy ideas include allowing him out for your pleasure, but not allowing him to achieve his release. It sounded cruel the first timd I hear of it, but believe me when I say my husband LOVES it! And I've read many posts on here by guys who enjoy being allowed to pleasure their ladies in similar ways. Some will tell you numbing cream and double condoms are key, while others prefer communication and concentration. My guess is the cream + condoms allows you more freedom to achieve your pleasure (havent tried it) while I know from experience that relying just on words and will either limits the activity towards my pleasure or he ends up coming no matter how much he tries to hold back.

 

I commend you on taking this journey together, you won't regret it, it'll be the best thing that ever happened to you both. Firstly, 2 to 3 days is not nearly long enough wait between his releases. At least a week or 2 will make his orgasms feel earth shattering when they occur. The longer he goes without, the more intense the tease will feel. Just about everything will get him going after a week or 2 without an orgasm. Secondly, there are so many things you can do to add fuel to the fire.

Make sure you tease him verbally every chance you get, poke fun at his predicament and always sound firm in tone as to your desire to keep him denied. Never ever let him top from the bottom.

Conduct teasing and denial sessions in which he is tied down to the bed spread eagle and you edge him multiple times and then ice him up and lock him back up. When making love, have him pleasure you orally and with a strapon, it will drive him crazy with passion when the night ends without orgasm for him. Ruined orgasms are also great choice for humiliation purposes. Force him to do things he normally wouldn't do if he wasn't chaste (chores, massages, pedicures, etc). As for humiliation, I find the most embarrassing thing is to be forced to wear women's underwear and the idea of making me release by my own hand under supervision of a fully clothed woman is very humiliating.

I know you think you're giving him pleasure by allowing him frequent orgasms, but trust me, his orgasms will be way better if they were infrequent. The important thing to understand is that saying no to his wanting an orgasm is not mean, you're literally taking him to a new level of sexual pleasure beyond anything he could ever imagine.

There's a lot that goes into chastity and I can't say I know everything, cause I'm still learning myself. I hope you both have fun exploring this lifestyle together. Hope this helps a bit. Good luck.

 

We used to do all the things you do not want to do, but not anymore. The only thing my wife will do now is to sometimes make me listen to her mastrubate over the phone when she is in the bedroom and I am in the livingroom. She will tell me to go down on her but when she is ready to orgasm, she pushes my head away and tells me that I am useless as she grabs her vibrator to finish herself off. She has reduced sex to only one night a week so it is more difficult for me to be denied an orgasm for a few months. She teases me about the size of my penis which is the only verbal humiliation she does. I give her foot or body massaged upon demand. Tonight she had me shave off all of my pubic hair. That is about it. We were into extreme stuff until a few years ago. Too old now.

 

I agree about making him wait longer than 3 days. 7+ days is usually for me when my entire brain changes in some very powerful ways. I can always sense it when that day arrives, and my princess enjoys it too.

It's very important for you to have sessions where you have pleasure and he doesn't. I think at first, me and my princess started with an entire weekend where I know I was not going to be released, but she got a lot of pleasure. And I spent a lot of time using my mouth and hands (and I got fucked also... but one step at time). The most important thing was to make the entire emphasis on her pleasure, which was actually very satisfying for both of us.

You can also experiment with not telling him exactly what his release date is. Any habit of his you want to improve? Make him perform it perfectly every day for at 5 days, and if he misses a day, you start back at 0.

Make him fuck YOU with a strap on. No reason you have to give up getting fucked just cause his real dick is useless. Most strap-ons only need a few minor adjustments, for him to fuck you. They also make some nice "gag-strapons" where he can fuck you with his face. All of which make him the object and you the subject.

You may need to ban him from porn. At least when he is supposed to be focused on you. But after around a week his brain is going to be finding any way it can to release.

You can also add a bit of protocol. For instance... declare the bedroom a place where he doesn't get to speak, unless spoken to. Make him go get the bedroom ready for you (clean it up, make the bed, dim the lights). And make him fall asleep with you (without any sex!).

When it comes to driving men crazy .. you should understand the Variable Schedule of Rewards. This is a well known theory (used by marketers, casinos, freemium games) where if you make the rewards RANDOM (he may or may NOT get a reward for good service) than it will make him even crazier.

http://www.nirandfar.com/2012/03/want-to-hook-your-users-drive-them-crazy.html

And again... denying him pleasure isn't being mean. It's a very exquisite form of control and pleasure.

 

I agree with some of the ideas. The most important is to add time to his release as the longer he goes between orgasms the more powerful they are. My own current 'record' is just under six weeks and after I had my orgasm I actually started to cry! The other effect is that for a few weeks after an orgasm if my Wife plays with me it is nice but as time goes on the feelings I experience ramp up. Yesterday my Wife managed to make me collapse in the shower and it has only been three weeks since my last orgasm.

My Wife is not interested in humiliation. I cross dress with her guidance not for humiliation but because it turns both of us on. As you can see from my current avatar the sorts of things I wear are real women's clothes, not frilly fantasy dresses. Wearing feminine underwear is my next step and I cannot wait. She has promised to dress me up in lingerie after I have lost 17 kg (about 37.5 pounds) and so far I have lost about 12 kg since January 4, so I am getting close and cannot wait. It was the best motivator I have ever had.

My Wife adores getting massages and oral pleasure from me, without feeling the need to reciprocate. She knows that what I want is to pleasure her and that the last thing I want is to orgasm every time we do this. She understands I need these longer periods between orgasms to make them more memorable and, after being hesitant about it at first, is now very happy to go along. She can see that it turns me on and she knows I get very horny, but that is part of her fun as well. In the few months we have been doing this (we started last October) she has got closer and closer to having an orgasm through me licking her bottom. I got her so close yesterday that after she turned over it only took moments of me giving her pussy some attention before she had a huge orgasm. It was brilliant.

Right, I can't write anymore, my HTv2 is about to split in two!

 

When you use the kitchen safe, ensure that the expiry time is when he's not going to be around. Then you can decide the next period without him able to do anything about it, and until he gets back home he'll not know if the key's available for an unlock or you've just renewed the session.

 

I think puppy play can be humiliating. What my wife has done to me is saran wrap my legs in frog tie style (ankles to back of thighs) and then duct tape them so I am "forced" to walk on my knees. Then socks are placed in my hand and I have to make a fist around them, They are then taped into a fist position before fist mitts are locked on my. Then I am forced to be her pet for the night. Sometimes in chastity. And she can put a gag on me when I am not eating food...or her ;-). All food is eaten on the floor with no hands obviously, to be sure of that my wrist is tied to my shoulder so for eating I have to rest on my elbows.

If he is out of chastity his penis and balls are hanging in an easy place to access for teasing while his collar is tied to something so he can't move away.

One time she let me try and have sex with her while I was tied like this. That was humiliating because I had no hands to guide my dick in and could not see (doggy style position) and just kept trying to find the sweet spot. She let me try which made me very horny but I was unable to actually do it which was humiliating.

Lastly even just walking around the house is a bit humiliating. he can still move around but has to learn a new way to walk. His view of everything is changed to that of dog, looking up at everything. And if you decide to tease him and wear skimpy clothing as you pull his leash behind you he can see your sweet spot and back side to make him more horny. If you had sex with him he will see his sperm leaking out of you and running down your thighs.

Whatever you decide let us know what you end up doing and how it worked out so we can have ideas too.

Have fun!!!

 

I had no idea that I had a feminine side until I was required to wear a bra and panties for a day! I was very humiliated and embarrassed at first, but that soon turned into a way that Mistress could dominate me privately. Later, the cage was introduced due to my continual wanking problem while dressed in lingerie. I don't go out fully dressed en femme and my feminine side is just between Mistress and me. You might have your hubby try on some silky panties and see if SHE likes it.

Another of Mistress's favorite torments is to put a collar on me and small puppy collars on my wrists and connect both wrists to my collar with small locks. Then She teases me and has me have sex with use of my hands to guide things in place. It can be quite frustrating and often ends in my having a failed orgasm, to Her delight!

 

My suggestion is to add playing with a key safe (like the masterlock one you get at Home Depot) and the fantastic app called photo time lock.
Taking the photo of the combination & setting the lock takes a little practice, but there are several very fun ways to play.

1. Neither of you knows the 4 digit combination that opens the safe to retrieve his keys. You BOTH must wait for the time you had set. So it's a bit like an enforced "dare". If you wait 4 days, until your normal bedtime say, and you want sex, you might say, "It's not quite time yet, but I need to be serviced. Just do the best you can with these sex toys. I need you to satisfy me". etc. And he doesn't get access to the key until the sex is possibly over, or maybe this results in really long high quality sex play, and you are still going and having an amazing time and you both are delighted when the pre-set time comes and you can unlock him.

2. You can always hide the entire key safe, saying, "I know the time is up, but I don't want you out quite yet." and/or "In fact, let's just reset it for this time tomorrow."

3. The time is set, putting him in that mindset of "no use begging. I just better serve her". But maybe you know the combo, or you can set it so you know a backup code that always over-rides to release the key.

Have fun! (My wife normally prefers more control,( #3), but we have the most fun when we play #1! she gets really excited not having control of the key.

 

Glad you like the idea. If you decide to do it please let us know the details!

 

Another thing you can do is get another kitchensafe, identical, so he can't know which one is holding the key, and have them set to different expiry times. Really keep him guessing.............

 

The big one (pun intended...) that surprised me was the whole penis size teasing thing. Apparently it doesn't even matter if they are bigger than average, it's still a turn on. But lines like 'Oh honey I'd never lock you in a cage if you were that big' or 'God I wonder how a cock that big would feel in me, do you think it'd make me cum?' And then we've taken it to the next level by upgrading our strap on to get a really big dildo that's very realistic, and having him fuck me with it while he's still caged is amazing!
I know you say butt play isn't an option but I don't know if you include him licking you in that. Again, a year ago I wouldn't have believed I'd be saying this, but having freshly showered, when I'm really turned on I absolutely love it, and he does to when he's caged (he's not bothered at all when he's not, it's so funny!).
Lots of people are complaining about you releasing him every few days but I would guess you mean to play rather than make him cum? In which case it's just the same as us, we do most days. But I am moving to orgasms maybe once a fortnight as an optimum now (with variety just to keep him on his toes...)
With the safe you could play a game where he does things to earn a digit of the code? A friend of mine is doing a similar thing where she and her husband negotiated a number of guesses, and each time he makes her cum he gets edged and gets to guess a number and only if it's the right one does he get to cum.

 

We have a very similiar lifestyle/structure as your with chastity. One thing I find EXTREMELY important is to make sure your man NEVER touches his penis ever, and he needs to stay locked all the time when you are with him or away unless you want to play with his cock. He should never know what it feels like to get used to his hand, it is YOUR cock not his now. He needs to feel threatned by you that you will punish him if he does anything wrong and you need to actually discipline/punish him and not let him get away with even small things. I hope this helped.

Make him have sex with you and not let him cum, if he cums make him wear the cage for a week strait with only teasing while locked. This will help him become a better lover. I only allow my boyfriend to cum once and every 4 or 5 fucks, he holds his cum in like a good boy most of the time while I cum numerous times ))

 

That sounds like a good idea. I'm might try that too when we shower. It is your cock. The moment he got locked up it became yours. I like that a lot. My bfs cock is mine and I have control over it.

 

M does not even want me to see mine uncaged. I'm transitioning to an Evotion Wearable and am still waiting for my piercing to heal up enough for the device. I expect that will be in 1 to 4 weeks. I wonder how I'll feel another 3 or 4 weeks after that.

 

I have to say I like the 'my cock' from a woman much better than when a dom says 'My pussy!' to a female sub, that always makes me laugh. 'No touching my pussy' from a dominant guy just sounds so wrong!

 

I find the entire idea of me being dominated by a woman totally acceptable, a fantasy. I know it goes against the norms of society and I am utterly OK with that. I am however an acknowledged hypocrite as I just cannot get comfortable with a male DOM controlling a female in the same way. I would love to meet a couple who live that sort of lifestyle so we could discuss how they go close to what would be considered domestic abuse by the majority of uneducated people. I am not in any way criticising anybody's choices in this matter but it just makes me very uncomfortable.

 

i know a Lady that's keep in chastity by another Lady and not a man but She still tells me what to do really when we goes there. But She is a nice Lady.

 

Sounds fun! How about having positive rewards and negative consequences to the dice role. Make like 15 of them "remain locked and pleasure me orally and with strap-on after giving me a bubble bath and full body massage under candle light. - no release" The remaining 5 chances can be split as follows: 1) "full orgasm any way you want (aka sex)" 2) "ruined orgasm via masturbation while I watch" 3) ruined orgasm by my hand while tied down" 4) "teasing and denial session - no release" 5) "surprise punishment - no release"

Have fun!

 

I would suggest every odd number be a punishment, every even number under 10 a funishment, 20 being PIV orgasm, 18 being orgasm after you have one, 16 a ruined orgasm after you have had one, 14 double orgasm for you, and 12 a single orgasm for you ... place the punishments and funishments based upon your level of pain/fun .... now if you feel really randy ... offer him something special where you can flip a coin at your choosing ... and then have the number revert ... so 20 would become 1 ... i.e. even's fill the roll of odds etc ....

 

As you said, to each his own, but that would not work for me. Getting what I want is not actually a reward for me. I so much want to be denied that something like this would not be a reward at all. I suspect that many other guys here are like me. Maybe your boy is or maybe this is a reward for him. You'll know that better than I but I wanted to share my perspective.

Now, if this is a reward for you, that is another thing.

Something denied makes it more precious. During times of intense play and denial I definitely wish for the opportunity to have my way with M. But when I get that opportunity I'm never as excited by it as I thought I would be. Our varying schedule and activities means that at some times play is not workable. At those times we may have straight sex. Last weekend our house was full of guests for several nights. With little time to our selves but feeling aroused we had straight sex. It was good. It didn't have the extra excitement of denial for me but we had been doing enough denial that it felt like a treat. Any reward like that must be rare enough that it feels like a reward.

Here's the variation that would work for me. M would cuff my feet to the foot of the bed and leave my hands free. I may have a blind fold or I may not. She would then get naked and lay at the top of the bed. She can move around to make herself available to me as she wanted. I get to touch her and pleasure her. She may allow penetration but she can control the depth. She can get a lot of pleasure and attention while I am still denied full access. As a twist, she may apply numbing cream to my penis so sensation is dampened.

Mostly when I fantasize about reward it is absence of a difficulty. On a 20 sided die # 1-16 could be some difficulty of one sort or another and #17-20 could be no difficulty. Rolling #18 would be a reward because it meant I do not have to endure some extra difficulty represented by other numbers.