I need a release.

How long are your normal lockup periods? Can you self lock if needed?

 

Hang in there, it will pass. She clearly likes to play, but isn't "playing around" lol. You got this!! What device are you locked in?

 

Just do what you're told. It's not all about you. Good luck

 

Stick with it and it will be worth it.

 

You'll be fine. Nobody has ever died from not cumming.

 

Further, She wants you to choose staying locked. That's why she gave you the ultimatum. If She didn't give a crap, She would unlock you and be done with it. Stay locked and see where it goes. You will be very surprised. Have you even leaked yet?? If not, then definitely hold out and wait til you at least experience that, it's blissful and damn cute and funny for Her to see!

Our absolute longest time in denial was 16 days, we have recently just doubled that, as I'm in day 33 of 120 minimally, possibly 150...we have been playing for chastity and tease and denial for 15 years, so everyone moves at their own pace.

But trust me, She wants you to pick staying locked....and for goodness sake stop putting Her in the position to give you this ultimatum!

 

She obviously likes how you are when you're locked up, so you do want to keep her happy, don't you?

What makes it much easier is to shift your focus from what you want (that blow job you're not going to get), to what she wants (which will make her happy). Divert your attention to her, and start to appreciate just how much pleasure you can get from making her happy.

 

Go get some exercise, take a shower and have a martini.

These days happen and they will pass and you'll be glad you made it through.

For me, as long as I can make it to, like, NOON I'll be okay.

OR DON'T! Give up, go fap and never come back to chastity. Don't let me tell you what to do.

 

You want it. You don't need it. Deep breaths... you'll be fine

 

Like others have said you don’t need a release, you want a release. You’ll get through this and when you do get the release it will be worth the wait as now your wife be engaged with this kink!

 

I like your wife . If you are whining she needs to be more stern .

 

See? A Monday Martini helps.

 

Unless it's a medical reason, discomfort or reddening caused by your cage, or a trip to a building with metal detectors or airport you shouldn't be unlocked. I can see why she gave you the ultimatum, you asked for this so you'll have to see it through.

And it will be worth it.

Besides, there are other ways to have a release without unlocking, but they mostly involve your ass, and I guess you're not ready to go down that road yet.

 

You are so lucky. Explicitly thank her for being strong and helping to improve your marital intimacy.

 

Agreed...she is great!

 

All the replies so far are missing the possibility that her thought process is “as I hoped! His silly obsession with chastity will soon be a thing of the past and we can get back to normal sex”.

 

What do you want to do? The female Is not always right...no one can be. Maybe you need a break or some release?

 

Take the bj

 

So, the original post and the posts following don’t give enough information to realistcally come to an answer to the intial question posed by the OP. Anytime you and your partner want to enter into a dynamic type of play or lifestyle like chastity, there needs to be some serious and non-play related communication that happens beforehand. If you didn’t have those conversations and don’t have a clear understanding together of what you want, you’re gonna have a bad time. My advice to you if you and your significant other hasn’t done so already is to have an evening or a day depending on how much needs to be discussed and make sure you are both on the same line of thought or page and agree to the same things. Once you have that understanding and have done the work, the real play and/or lifestyle can begin in earnest without as many issues. You should also have times to check on this status from time to time and make sure you’re both still on the same page and change and negotiate as necessary.

Example: She wants to have all the control, you want at least some say or a safeword that doesn’t end in the end of all play with very clear parameters for safeword use. You come to and agreement. You shake hands or sign something to that effect and then you abide by it. You both follow these rules. Knowing where the boundaries lay, you can now play with wreckless abandon. The example I like to use for this is the idea of a basketball court on the top of two different buildings. On one building, there is no fencing around the court on the second the court is fenced in. On which building would a group be more likely to play with less confusion or worry? The logical answer is the one that has a clear boundary and prevents the players from going off the edge of the building and falling to their detriment. Think about it.

Finally, if you want a release so badly right now, maybe you jumped into this too quikcly without thinking about the consequences. Be careful what you wish for is not meant to be a joke as much as a warning to those who seek chastity. I hope this helps.

 

I have not been allowed to fuck my wife or her long time girlfriend/lover for 25+ years. I am allowed to perform oral only once or twice a year as I was told by both my wife and her female lover that girls are much better at it and they prefer not to have me go down on them. My sex life was supervised masturbation as the two women sexually tortured me. Then commercial chastity cages small enough to fit my 4 1/2 erect penis came along and it has been 14 years of being locked most of the time and sex only for my wife's pleasure or her girlfriend prior to the last 15 years.

All I can say is you get used to it and find ways to get relief without an orgasm. For me, sexual pain does it for me. Nipple torture and CBT along with ass caning now excites my wife. In fact she needs to hear me moan in pain to orgasm.

You will learn to take pleasure from your key holder's orgasms. I know that when my wife cums I feel sexually satisfied and good for another week or two. I go months between orgasms and it does not bother me as long as we still have sex. When my wife has an orgasms I share it and it calms me down. Over the last few decades, my wife's girlfriend taught me to get sexual relief through sexual pain. That girl loved to hurt men and would sigh with pleasure when she hurt me. She loved it so much that her thighs would be soaked with her lubrication. She did not want to fuck me or do oral. She just wanted to work me over till my ass was bruised or bleeding and then cum on her vibrator as I made love to her dirty feet or had painful clips on my nipples that made me moan in pain.

So basically, if you want to continue with chastity, you need to find something that satisfies you. WHen my wife cums it calms me down greatly. Today she caned my butt, slapped my face and scratched my back hard. She punched my balls a few times and had two orgasms. I no longer feel that i need to orgasm after that.

If you cannot find something in chastity that you enjoy, it is going to be difficult for you to continue. I remember those days when I used to have 3 or 4 orgasms a day. i would have sex with my wife and one of her girlfriends in a threesome, then sex with each individually for three times that night but also sometimes i had sex with a side girl at lunch or after work for 4 orgasms a day. That ended over the course of 5 years as I got ED and not even Viagra could get if hard anymore. That started my chastity without a cage and then with a cage.

My wife prefers sex with women and does not find a penis arousing or aesthetically pleasing. She hates semen and thinks it is disgusting so chastity was a good sexual relationship for us. Even when I am allowed to orgasm, my wife does not do it. I have to jerk off as she causes me more and more pain until I cum. You just have to find other ways to enjoy sex or have your keyholder allow you to orgasm more often. That can be fun too. She could fuck your ass with a dildo and give you only 3 minutes to cum or she locks you up again. My wife used to talk to me during the three minutes to distract me so i could not cum and then she would lock me up for another week to try again.

Basically you need to find a balance between the needs of both of you. We have lots of sex toys and my cock is useless to any woman as it does not get hard anymore, is tiny, does not produce much semen and my semen is abnormal making me sterile. I admit that I have an advantage because my wife prefers women. We tested that twice with other guys and she never was able to orgasm with them. I was the first and only man to make her have orgasms and multiple ones until I no longer could get it up anymore. She had orgasms easily with women though.

To be real, even the old marketing director of a major chastity cage company admitted that 90% of the cages they sole end up collecting dust in a drawer once the initial excitement wears off. Plus most men are unaware that being locked in chastity does not prevent you from making yourself orgasm. I have to wonder at those guy because you can see how guys cum when locked in porn. A vibrator, anal didlo, sticking something in the cage to jerk off with or simply jerking your cage will work. Not to mention private time in showers. A cage is not going to stop anyone from having an orgasm so self control is still required. Since my orgasms are difficult to achieve and are not that great anyway, it is easy for me to remain orgasm free for months at a time. Find something that you like an take pleasure from that or talk to your keyholder and agree on an orgasm schedule. Most guys get to cum once a month. Tha is the most popular time frame in every survey I saw and were told by makers of cages who use their products.

In short, negotiate with your key holder for the terms of your chastity. Despite porn, most guys do not want to be slaves to their keyholder and only do what she wants. That will not end well. You need to reach an agreement where both of you get what you want out of chastity. Even then, at the end of each year my wife and I talk it over and make changes to keep it fun for both of us.

 

Damn. Just tonight she wants me do do hardcore mode on qiui. She's taking the emergency key back as i could probably break the keybox in a real emergency. She mentioned a missive from fifty shades, I have no intention of reading or watching this, get enough ridiculous fantasy here, not pointed at you @vinnyD . We spoke about slave contracts and think that's where we're headed this week. Then I read your post. We're getting a bit deep maybe.