Ex fiancée treats me like her slave - opinions on this pls!

Joey G

Joey G

Long term member
Feb 9, 2021
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Hey everyone!! Been quite a while since I posted here. Hope everyone is doing well and healthy!

So the many many posts I wrote about with my ex doing chastity and everything else, I now find myself in a new interesting position. I really want the opinion of this open minded community to tell me there thoughts!

My ex and I broke up going on 3 years now. We kept in touch on/off. I'm 36 she's 28. While we were together we did the chastity thing, I was her at home slave, we did SPH, she got her girlfriends involved, really fun times lol. She loved it at that time but it ended up being to much for her and we didn't agree on A LOT of things like moving her mother and sister in and all this other stuff so long story short things ended.

Looks wise, she is a 5'5" 130lb Latina, and she is very attractive with DD boobs. She was probably the best I've locked down as far as long term relationships go. Her as a person? Completely selfish, only cares about what benefits HER.

She is now living with another guy. Knowing her the way I do she is only with him to fill the gap of not being single and this guy pays for the rent. Her entire family of girls are all hot and they all have guys who pay for them.

I started seeing her IG stories when she would get her lady things done, hair nails etc. and I would apple pay her and say hey nails on me today. She loved that. Fast forward she randomly said recently "you've been such a good boy here's a little something in return!" sends me a full blown nude pic lol. So of course I'm thinking so she's sending me nudes, allowing me to pay for her, ALL while with another guy. I wonder if she did that shit with another guy when she was with me? Very likely.

Yesterday she stopped over to pick up some inexpensive clothes I got her and we got chatting. She basically said she wants me to be her slave again. Pay for certain things, do what she says, and in return she will send me pics etc. I already know things with her dude are rocky and it isn't going to last because its just what she does. When she becomes single, I know she will have me over her house to clean for her, give her nude massages, possibly even start letting me have sex with her again, handjobs etc. but she wants me as her slave. That's how we left off.

I have a full time job making great money, I hustle doing other things, I'm seeing other girls (not doing any of this roleplay stuff) and really this is just a fun little role play game for me when I'm off work and don't have anything going on. Anything wrong with enjoying this while I can? Honestly, I usually would feel bad about the other guy but I don't. I'm leaving a lot of details out but the dudes a jack ass, so F em. and she sucks as a person but is really FUN to serve because she is hot as hell and loves me being her slave.

Two weeks ago she sent me a video with her and 6 girlfriends in a car all buzzed yelling at the camera how I have a small dick lol. She told them all I was tiny and she wants to humiliate me lol. Probably the best humiliation she has ever done for me. Now I am not tiny at all, but she knows I like SPH so she does it for me. Her girlfriends think its true which makes it even more fun!

This has been happening on/off for the past year. Wanted some feedback please on this. I just don't know how much longer to keep it going? It's fun but sometimes I think to myself why are you even still talking to this woman? Then I get horny and that all goes out the window lol. Appreciate all of you!

-Joey
 
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aaah the power of P....i suspect you're submissive. I imagine the line of beautiful women willing to dominate you is relatively short. There for my suggestion, is to grow into the real you through Total submission to her.
 
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Joey G said:
Hey everyone!! Been quite a while since I posted here. Hope everyone is doing well and healthy!

So the many many posts I wrote about with my ex doing chastity and everything else, I now find myself in a new interesting position. I really want the opinion of this open minded community to tell me there thoughts!

My ex and I broke up going on 3 years now. We kept in touch on/off. I'm 36 she's 28. While we were together we did the chastity thing, I was her at home slave, we did SPH, she got her girlfriends involved, really fun times lol. She loved it at that time but it ended up being to much for her and we didn't agree on A LOT of things like moving her mother and sister in and all this other stuff so long story short things ended.

Looks wise, she is a 5'5" 130lb Latina, and she is very attractive with DD boobs. She was probably the best I've locked down as far as long term relationships go. Her as a person? Completely selfish, only cares about what benefits HER.

She is now living with another guy. Knowing her the way I do she is only with him to fill the gap of not being single and this guy pays for the rent. Her entire family of girls are all hot and they all have guys who pay for them.

I started seeing her IG stories when she would get her lady things done, hair nails etc. and I would apple pay her and say hey nails on me today. She loved that. Fast forward she randomly said recently "you've been such a good boy here's a little something in return!" sends me a full blown nude pic lol. So of course I'm thinking so she's sending me nudes, allowing me to pay for her, ALL while with another guy. I wonder if she did that shit with another guy when she was with me? Very likely.

Yesterday she stopped over to pick up some inexpensive clothes I got her and we got chatting. She basically said she wants me to be her slave again. Pay for certain things, do what she says, and in return she will send me pics etc. I already know things with her dude are rocky and it isn't going to last because its just what she does. When she becomes single, I know she will have me over her house to clean for her, give her nude massages, possibly even start letting me have sex with her again, handjobs etc. but she wants me as her slave. That's how we left off.

I have a full time job making great money, I hustle doing other things, I'm seeing other girls (not doing any of this roleplay stuff) and really this is just a fun little role play game for me when I'm off work and don't have anything going on. Anything wrong with enjoying this while I can? Honestly, I usually would feel bad about the other guy but I don't. I'm leaving a lot of details out but the dudes a jack ass, so F em. and she sucks as a person but is really FUN to serve because she is hot as hell and loves me being her slave.

Two weeks ago she sent me a video with her and 6 girlfriends in a car all buzzed yelling at the camera how I have a small dick lol. She told them all I was tiny and she wants to humiliate me lol. Probably the best humiliation she has ever done for me. Now I am not tiny at all, but she knows I like SPH so she does it for me. Her girlfriends think its true which makes it even more fun!

This has been happening on/off for the past year. Wanted some feedback please on this. I just don't know how much longer to keep it going? It's fun but sometimes I think to myself why are you even still talking to this woman? Then I get horny and that all goes out the window lol. Appreciate all of you!

-Joey
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Get rid of her! She's obviously in this for herself and doesn't give a $hit about you. Find someone else who will be supportive and not try to humiliate you like this.
 
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She is probably taking advantage of you, but at the same time, you seem to be aware of it. Also you love what she does to you so you are getting something out of it too.

My first thought is to say that if you want to have fun on the side with her, as a casual relationship, why not? Nothing wrong about that.

But my second thought is, how do you protect yourself? Not really from her because you already know what she is, and she can’t really manipulate you, but from yourself?

A horny men who is getting is deep fantasy fulfilled is week, and it is a D/s relationship where you give over power… I could imagine you getting stuck in it for years!

Maybe what I would do is:
1. Set clear boundaries (without telling her!) of things you find unacceptable, and if she crosses them you’re out.
2. Go on dates and find a better person. When you do, end this relationship.

if you don’t think you can follow your own rules, then run!
But will you?
 
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Joey G said:
Hey everyone!! Been quite a while since I posted here. Hope everyone is doing well and healthy!

So the many many posts I wrote about with my ex doing chastity and everything else, I now find myself in a new interesting position. I really want the opinion of this open minded community to tell me there thoughts!

My ex and I broke up going on 3 years now. We kept in touch on/off. I'm 36 she's 28. While we were together we did the chastity thing, I was her at home slave, we did SPH, she got her girlfriends involved, really fun times lol. She loved it at that time but it ended up being to much for her and we didn't agree on A LOT of things like moving her mother and sister in and all this other stuff so long story short things ended.

Looks wise, she is a 5'5" 130lb Latina, and she is very attractive with DD boobs. She was probably the best I've locked down as far as long term relationships go. Her as a person? Completely selfish, only cares about what benefits HER.

She is now living with another guy. Knowing her the way I do she is only with him to fill the gap of not being single and this guy pays for the rent. Her entire family of girls are all hot and they all have guys who pay for them.

I started seeing her IG stories when she would get her lady things done, hair nails etc. and I would apple pay her and say hey nails on me today. She loved that. Fast forward she randomly said recently "you've been such a good boy here's a little something in return!" sends me a full blown nude pic lol. So of course I'm thinking so she's sending me nudes, allowing me to pay for her, ALL while with another guy. I wonder if she did that shit with another guy when she was with me? Very likely.

Yesterday she stopped over to pick up some inexpensive clothes I got her and we got chatting. She basically said she wants me to be her slave again. Pay for certain things, do what she says, and in return she will send me pics etc. I already know things with her dude are rocky and it isn't going to last because its just what she does. When she becomes single, I know she will have me over her house to clean for her, give her nude massages, possibly even start letting me have sex with her again, handjobs etc. but she wants me as her slave. That's how we left off.

I have a full time job making great money, I hustle doing other things, I'm seeing other girls (not doing any of this roleplay stuff) and really this is just a fun little role play game for me when I'm off work and don't have anything going on. Anything wrong with enjoying this while I can? Honestly, I usually would feel bad about the other guy but I don't. I'm leaving a lot of details out but the dudes a jack ass, so F em. and she sucks as a person but is really FUN to serve because she is hot as hell and loves me being her slave.

Two weeks ago she sent me a video with her and 6 girlfriends in a car all buzzed yelling at the camera how I have a small dick lol. She told them all I was tiny and she wants to humiliate me lol. Probably the best humiliation she has ever done for me. Now I am not tiny at all, but she knows I like SPH so she does it for me. Her girlfriends think its true which makes it even more fun!

This has been happening on/off for the past year. Wanted some feedback please on this. I just don't know how much longer to keep it going? It's fun but sometimes I think to myself why are you even still talking to this woman? Then I get horny and that all goes out the window lol. Appreciate all of you!

-Joey
Click to expand...
She's an ex, and presumably for a good reason. Avoid
 
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At this point I think you'd be better off just paying an actual prostitute because it doesn't seem like this thing with your ex is going to end well. If I were to pay a whore I'd much rather the whore be professional and not be someone unstable who I had an awful history with. I know it has to be hard to find a woman who is into the chastity/FLR thing but I think I would rather be alone than be in an abusive relationship with someone just because they fulfill my fetishes.

Of course, I don't know everything about this woman, but from your description she sounds horrific and I would just cease all contact with her.
 
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Hookers are not really my thing, but at least they keep their mouths shut about their "sessions". There's a difference between being dominant and being controlling. An ideal keyholder would be dominant but still caring and supportive and not treat their sub like total trash and publicly humiliate them. I'd rather be with a hooker than have to put up with an Ex who's a control freak. Something @Joey G should consider.

@Joey G , You need to say one simple but powerful word to that Ex of yours: "Goodbye!" Trust me, you'll be far better off. Find someone who adores you instead of treating you like personal property. Looks on the outside are important, but not as much as the personality they conceal. Remember this for your own sake.
 
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Don't listen to the naysayers, they have tiny weeners and are just jealous. If you enjoy then rock on.

I suggest you take it to the next level and take some hugely embarrassing photos so she can blackmail you, and send them to your ex, and also send her your credit card details so she can be in charge of how much you spend on her.

You know it makes sense.
 
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JaySaysYes said:
Don't listen to the naysayers, they have tiny weeners and are just jealous. If you enjoy then rock on.

I suggest you take it to the next level and take some hugely embarrassing photos so she can blackmail you, and send them to your ex, and also send her your credit card details so she can be in charge of how much you spend on her.

You know it makes sense.
Click to expand...

if you’re not going to break off contact with your ex and try to negotiate a more interesting but saner relationship with any of the other women you’re seeing, well … as frightening as it seems, @JaySaysYes may have a point.

Either move on with someone else or settle in and commit.
 
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I went on a date with a girl who was very attractive but bonkers and a complete bitch. I wasn't expecting too much and it was somewhat more entertainment than troubling. But she was sooo rude and abusive. Anyhow I went on a second date with her as it was cheaper and more authentic humiliation than seeing a dominatrix. She wasn't putting it on, she just had no filter and was rude abusive person (but very hot).

After the second date, I realised she wasn't a nice person at all, I lost interest in her, and decided that it was deeply unhealthy to see her again, so decided against anything more.
 
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JamesD said:
I went on a date with a girl who was very attractive but bonkers and a complete bitch. I wasn't expecting too much and it was somewhat more entertainment than troubling. But she was sooo rude and abusive. Anyhow I went on a second date with her as it was cheaper and more authentic humiliation than seeing a dominatrix. She wasn't putting it on, she just had no filter and was rude abusive person (but very hot).

After the second date, I realised she wasn't a nice person at all, I lost interest in her, and decided that it was deeply unhealthy to see her again, so decided against anything more.
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And that's because you have a healthy dose of self esteem. We so much need that as people. I get it, it can be fun to play someone's slave, but the key word there is play. Like I find myself sometimes wishing for my wife to me a "mistress", until she starts bossing me around on non-sexual, non-fun ways. Do this, do that, yelling, etc (she doesn't, but sometimes it feels close) elicits a "fuck you" response from me. I'll play the slave. As long as she has respect and loves me, it's great. I'm generous to everyone, but I do not like being taken advantage of.

My question to the OP is what are you really getting out of it? Do you really like to be made fun of in front of others? Essentially do you like being called a loser? I'm sure we could do that for you here. Is that what you want? I guess, I don't understand why someone would like that. Shared respect is so much more rewarding.
 
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atxmtb said:
And that's because you have a healthy dose of self esteem. We so much need that as people. I get it, it can be fun to play someone's slave, but the key word there is play. Like I find myself sometimes wishing for my wife to me a "mistress", until she starts bossing me around on non-sexual, non-fun ways. Do this, do that, yelling, etc (she doesn't, but sometimes it feels close) elicits a "fuck you" response from me. I'll play the slave. As long as she has respect and loves me, it's great. I'm generous to everyone, but I do not like being taken advantage of.

My question to the OP is what are you really getting out of it? Do you really like to be made fun of in front of others? Essentially do you like being called a loser? I'm sure we could do that for you here. Is that what you want? I guess, I don't understand why someone would like that. Shared respect is so much more rewarding.
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I recently took some therapy. It's not something I do often. One of the big realisations is that fantasies are healthy but often the things we fantasise over most would very much NOT be acceptable 24/7. Consider a business man who goes to see a professional dominatrix who smacks his bottom and verbally degrades him. Of course this may be a positive release but the important this is that this business man would NOT find it very satisfying to leave his job and have this type of abuse and degradation 8 hours every day. Similarly we may fantasise over our partners playing an extremely dominant, or perhaps even abusive role, but if we had to live with that 24/7 with the pressure of work and kids, and whatever adverse life circumstances come up, it would leave you feeling very unhappy indeed.

Many men on here have the fantasy of being locked up and cuckolded by their partners, perhaps even publicly. While a hot fantasy, many people would not be able to cope with this. And, no doubt there have been examples of people who have gone down this path only to find it unacceptable and with no way back.

I'm a big fan of 'sandboxing' play sessions for this reason.

Be careful what you wish for as it may not actually be what you could put up with.
 
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What should you do? Well, when you meet a horribly self centered abusing bitch who has zero interest in you beyond your wallet and you wiping her toilet- you have no choice but to go in deeper! Come on, we all need to see the guy who just tosses his life away to spend it with trash. Without stories like that life would be so boring.
 
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First off, you ALL are F'ing amazing! Such a great community of people who understand having fun with kinks but also having boundaries and self respect. Thank you for such fantastic feedback!

For the record I am fully aware how she is with using me to do things/pay for her. Now when I say I pay, I don't mean hundreds and hundreds of dollars. Maybe once a week she will ask for $30 for lunch, or $100 for her nails every so often or to pay for her bikini waxing session. I make really good money so it really doesn't effect me, BUT that is still spending money on an EX that could be going towards investments or whatever.

It's ONLY with her that I enjoy this kink because of her being my ex. Some days I am not into it, but most days it turns me on knowing she see's me as a "weak man that she uses and makes fun of." lol. I actually laugh when I think about it because my day to day I am not that at all. I run my own business and absolutely dominate in the sales world.

I think it's because I am so dominate and high energy ALL DAY LONG that this is a like a little escape for me to unwind.

I do believe having strong boundaries (without telling her) is a must. If it gets to a point where it is effecting my day then she has to be cut off. I also do date around with a lot of women and have fun!
 
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