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(Gentle) Female Superiority

Discussion in 'The Pedestal' started by slayergirl, Jan 3, 2017.

  1. Hello :p

    I found this site while searching for discussions and info about male chastity. My bf brought it up, it sounded fun but I wanted to be sure it was something I wanted for us. I do! Lol

    But after reading a lot of posts about relationship styles and dynamics it had Me thinking about it and I think our relationship would be best described as one that practices gentle Female superiority. As in that it's like a FLR but I think we're both pretty equal in our day to day, I get final say a lot, but we play with the dynamic that Myself (and Women in general) hold much more value than males.

    Its sort of a weird thing, and it plays out in silly ways- I try to keep it to the bedroom and in private. My bf likes to play around with it in public as well, ie. tipping Waitresses better than waiters, holding the door for Women, giving his seat up to Women on public transit etc.
    He does all these things as an act of appreciation for Women.

    In the bedroom we don't play too rough, no BDSM or anything like that. I'll slap and squeeze his balls, ruin his orgasms and (will soon) keep him locked for short periods of time, otherwise its him worshipping My body, but thats fairly "vanilla" I suppose.. Also we role play and talk about themes of males expendability and Female divinity, and stuff like that.

    I just wanted to open up about this, and see if anyone could relate or are in a similar relationship?

  2. I think there are quite a lot of us who play the chastity game in a not very serious, one could say almost tongue in cheek way. We are both fairly strong-willed and (thanks to the way the UK education system used to work in the 60's and 70's) well educated. My wife is a doctor so not exactly a shrinking violet and I have a Ph.D in one of the physical sciences so not much given to being wrong :). The combination has made for an interesting ride over more than 40 years.

    We eventually dumped our respective day jobs to run our own companies and, as it happens, her company distributed everything mine made so it always had a bigger turnover than mine. In that respect at least we had a big power exchange thing going.

    I would never tip waiters worse than waitresses but as for the other stuff you mention like holding doors etc it is just what you do having been brought up English in the 1950's.

    The chastity thing is just one of our kinks and we use short-term lock-up as extended foreplay in a way that gets us both a little frustrated and ready to rip each other's clothes off.

    Welcome! I hope you find lots of kindred spirits here.
  3. i can definitely relate, and Mrs and i are in a similar place regarding Female-superiority, though we're further down the rabbit-hole... We'll be embarking on long-term chastity, and some much more intense relationship adventures (don't want to scare you off, LOL, but am happy to discuss in more detail if you'd like).
    Hans Dietrick and Drew02560 like this.
  4. Thank you, and congrats to you and the Misses! So beautiful to hear you two are 40 years strong :) and I so love the framing of "tongue in cheek". I think the biggest motivator in our relationship right now is that it is fun and loving.

    My bf definitely likes to be chivalrous (but not in a patronizing way) and he enjoys when our play is unfair to males- though I try to treat strangers with respect and dignity.
    Hans Dietrick likes this.
  5. Lol the rabbit-hole? What wonderland can this lead to? ;-) Please share anything you feel comfortable with. I made the thread for anyone to share their thoughts and experiences on the subject :)

    ps. love your grammar (Female/male)
    Hans Dietrick likes this.
  6. You have a wonderful sounding relationship going there and it seems both of you enjoy the level you play at and in the end that is all that truly matters. Enjoy life and live it at your own level there is always fun to be had if everyone enjoys the ride.
    Hans Dietrick likes this.
  7. I suppose I should say though, My bf has expressed some sincere feelings on the belief that Women are better (at the very least much more special) than men. And I am inclined to agree :) (even outside of fantasy).
    Hans Dietrick and Mistress B like this.
  8. My philosophy is simply women come first. Holding doors and giving up seats is basic chivalry and expected. My wife's happiness and pleasure come before mine, which I understand is part of true love. It is up to her if she wants to reciprocate. I am happy either way. When she is happy, so am I.
  9. Thats beautiful <3
    Hans Dietrick likes this.
  10. Thank you so much! Welcome to CM.
  11. Welcome!

    I don't get in to the whole superiority thing, but grew up with certain mannerisms that can be off putting to a modern woman. I got back into the dating pool last year and when I stood up when she left or arrived my kh didn't know how to react! Lol!

    We called them manners as a kid, but it was how we grew up.

    I have found that some tongue in cheek comments always seem to slip out here and there, especially when out and about. Only meant for us, and sometimes just a look, but it usually revolves around "really? Is that what you think?", something reminding me who has control of my penis lol.

    It doesn't get too serious at home, there was never a spanking in anger.

    Good luck!
    Hans Dietrick and slave stroppy like this.
  12. For about 60 of my 72 years, I was the traditional alpha male and then my wife/Mistress and I began to play with power exchange and we both found that we enjoyed the female superior aspect more than me being so dominant. (Actually, for me, it was quite a relief to be stripped of all big responsibility, but I rarely admit that!). Each couple evolves in their own direction and at their own speed. The most important thing, in the long run, is good and open communication. As long as that's working, both of you can enjoy whatever sort of relationship that you mutually carve out!
  13. Both Mrs and i are feminists, and our relationship started from a foundation and fundamental assumption of equality in all things. Before we were married, i was sure to tell her all about my submissiveness, fantasies, desires, and kink experiences. She was coming from a very vanilla place, so it was a big, deep conversation :)

    In our day-to-day lives we still live the same egalitarian lifestyle, but in the bedroom, we've slowly and steadily moved towards a place where Her pleasure is of utmost importance, where i derive mine from Hers.

    For the most part, my orgasms are vicarious these days. We have sex when She wants, how She wants, and for as long as She wants.

    One thing that we've come to is that what She wants from me is oral sex. She has never orgasmed from PIV sex with me, so there's no point in me having PIV sex anymore. On the other hand, She really likes PIV sex, so we're in the process of finding her a man who can satisfy her that way.

    Basically, i lover Her so much, i want Her to have every pleasure and joy we can manage, even if it's someone else giving it to Her.

    Thank You :)
    anasyrma likes this.
  14. Ha, wow I suppose we should be cautious :p Thats actually very similar to our start, Feminists bonding and living life. My guy opened up about some of his kinks, introduced Me to them and play in the bedroom that favored My pleasure over his. And it's grown from there!

    Although I limit his orgasms and ruin them when he gets them (usually), I would die without PIV and he's very good at that :) though oral is a regular part of our "honoring ceremonies" as we call them lol

    I am very not attracted to the idea of cuckolding or sharing, but this is such a beautiful and loving statement! Wow <3
    Hans Dietrick likes this.
  15. @Mistress_M@Mistress_M and I are very similar to what you've described you relationship with chastity is like. For us we started with an impromptu FLR and chastity. Mistress loves our new lifestyle and loves the way I treat her like a queen on a daily basis. She is not really into bdsm but we slowly inch that direction because she knows I like it and she is slowly developing a taste for it herself. She's not big into real punishment so things for the most part are pretty relaxed with us but she does have expectations of my behavior as well as certain tasks and chores that our solely my responsibility. The longer we've been doing this the more she feels comfortable taking more control.

    At some point I want her to be more serious and take my punishments more seriously but I imagine that will come along with time as I've already seen some changes in that direction. We will be at 2 years in April and I'm excited about our second chastiversary. This has been such a great experience for us both. @slayergirl@slayergirl
    slayergirl and Hans Dietrick like this.
  16. Welcome ma'am. I like your viewpoint and think it's very romantic. I think you'll find that taking away his ability to masturbate will force him to transfer those feelings of lust he's now unable to gratify into even greater appreciation of you and of women in general. Just be sure to enforce his chastity strictly when the going gets tough for him because he will do and say anything to get out when he's been locked for a while. Good luck.
    slayergirl and Hans Dietrick like this.
  17. My wife and I are like that. She is only dominant in the bedroom. Outside of it we are equals. We have never done anything against the other's wishes that I can remember. My wife is the Mistress of our home. She runs our household as she sees fit but never orders me to do anything. I do not believe that women are superior; equal but not superior. I am a sexual submissive but outside of the bedroom I am not submissive to anyone, man or woman.

    We have been into chastity for 4 years without any real D/s stuff. Once in a while my wife would beat my butt but as a masochist, I wanted it more than she did. You can do chastity and live your life as you wish. Do not believe all that you read online as it is a place where many live out their sex lives. After a few decades of BDSM sex, we easily slip in and out of our roles as we wish. Just do chastity in a way that is fun for both of you. If one or both of you are pretending to please the other, it will not work out for long.
  18. Thank you :) and I can totally relate, Greg introduced Me to slapping and squeezing his balls. That was nerve racking at first lol I didn't want to hurt him terribly but he showed Me how he likes it and it's a rush when we play rough! I've definitely gotten more confident because of this lifestyle change and I love it!

    So happy for you, and congrats on the upcoming anniversary! <3
    Lockedwithlove likes this.