Looking for resources

Ed Brock

Ed Brock

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May 17, 2014
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Hi,
My wife has come to be a strict keyholder. I wouldn't say she enjoys being a keyholder, rather she enjoys the fact that it reduces her stress. She gets sex when and how she wants and I am not allowed to ask her about it. To be honest it isn't always fun or enjoyable for me, but it is exciting. I got what I asked for and I love/hate it. But, I think we're a bit closer. I know I feel closer to her!

I am interested in approaching the subject of FLR for her. But if she sees it as something extra she has to do, it'll be a turn off. She isn't really into femdom. Spanking, for example, means something added to her plate. So, I'm looking for a blog or BDSMLR account that might have pics, captions, or real life accounts of how an FLR benefits the wife instead of being just another kink for the husband. I am especially looking for pics or accounts of the husband doing chores while the wife relaxes. Or the husband standing in a corner while enjoys some quiet time with a book, tv or a phone. Thoughts? Advice? Thanks in advance!
Ed
 
Ed Brock said:
Hi,
My wife has come to be a strict keyholder. I wouldn't say she enjoys being a keyholder, rather she enjoys the fact that it reduces her stress. She gets sex when and how she wants and I am not allowed to ask her about it. To be honest it isn't always fun or enjoyable for me, but it is exciting. I got what I asked for and I love/hate it. But, I think we're a bit closer. I know I feel closer to her!

I am interested in approaching the subject of FLR for her. But if she sees it as something extra she has to do, it'll be a turn off. She isn't really into femdom. Spanking, for example, means something added to her plate. So, I'm looking for a blog or BDSMLR account that might have pics, captions, or real life accounts of how an FLR benefits the wife instead of being just another kink for the husband. I am especially looking for pics or accounts of the husband doing chores while the wife relaxes. Or the husband standing in a corner while enjoys some quiet time with a book, tv or a phone. Thoughts? Advice? Thanks in advance!
Ed
Click to expand...
FLR doesn't need to be about when she decides/wants sex. Most on here think it's about giving oral, foot massages and pegging. For us, it's quite the opposite, yes she decides when she wants pleasured, or demands a foot rub but in our relationship its more. She tells me when she wants to hsve dinner, what we'll have, give me other tasks like put the washing on, put it away, vacuum the carpets, and lots more.

in short, it makes her life easier with minimal effort.

A
 
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Ed Brock said:
So, I'm looking for a blog or BDSMLR account that might have pics, captions, or real life accounts of how an FLR benefits the wife instead of being just another kink for the husband.
Ed
Click to expand...
I'm afraid that, in my experience, almost all such web content is male fantasy centric and its extremely difficult to find genuinely female written source information on the subject of FLR's. This, IMHO, is the only truly educative material worth reading on the subject.
Even seemingly Female written material can be geared towards the male fantasy rather than the, very much more difficult, actual reality of living in any power exchange dynamic that is set within a loving, working, mostly vanilla based relationship.
 
Ed Brock said:
Hi,
My wife has come to be a strict keyholder. I wouldn't say she enjoys being a keyholder, rather she enjoys the fact that it reduces her stress. She gets sex when and how she wants and I am not allowed to ask her about it. To be honest it isn't always fun or enjoyable for me, but it is exciting. I got what I asked for and I love/hate it. But, I think we're a bit closer. I know I feel closer to her!

I am interested in approaching the subject of FLR for her. But if she sees it as something extra she has to do, it'll be a turn off. She isn't really into femdom. Spanking, for example, means something added to her plate. So, I'm looking for a blog or BDSMLR account that might have pics, captions, or real life accounts of how an FLR benefits the wife instead of being just another kink for the husband. I am especially looking for pics or accounts of the husband doing chores while the wife relaxes. Or the husband standing in a corner while enjoys some quiet time with a book, tv or a phone. Thoughts? Advice? Thanks in advance!
Ed
Click to expand...
Thinking about this, it seems to me if she is already comfortable with your chastity the move to full FLR is yours to commit to. If you just ask her opinion before you do anything, take "yes, that's fine" as yes and any other response "I guess, I'm not sure, well I suppose" as a no from a person not used to being dominant, she will slowly get used to being in charge and rise the her comfort level of dominance. If she asks your opinion, you give it to her, but still make sure you follow the decision she is comfortable with. And if she says she wants you to make a decision, you do it, it was her lead, what she wanted. Just make sure you don't make a decision until she tells you to. Always let her do what is comfortable for her, and you are in an FLR, even if it is not as dynamic as a classic Dom/Sub relationship.
I'm an alpha male, always have been. I've just started chastity, and realized after thinking about it, this is right where I'm at. She is supportive of my chastity, has accepted being my KH, even though I am not comfortable enough yet to give up my emergency key. She asked me if she was suppose to be teasing regularly, because that seemed like work. I made it clear she was to only do what she felt like doing, and while I would love for to tease me all the time. No teasing at all would be fine if that is what she wanted to do. So I'm moving forward this way and will see how it goes. When she asks me to do something, I will take it as an order, when I want to do something, I will carefully ask her if it's OK. And I will see how it goes.
 
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Check out this book and give it to her and then have a conversation about it as to how you could incorporate an FLR.

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