Oral

You said it, sister! In the pursuit of becoming 'the perfect domme' we often lose sight of what's unique and brilliant about ourselves, becoming too focused on what we should be doing and what happens if we don't do this or that. Excellent humourous -- but legitimate point: who's going to turn up? The BDSM police?

It's easy to lapse into depression when you engage yourself in the comparison game -- whether it's to other dommes, those of your profession or industry -- even your friends. There will always be those greater and lesser than ourselves, and getting bogged down by our weaknesses is a pointless and debilitating practise.

I second chucking out anything in your library which doesn't stress that whatever you do -- so long as it's safe, sane and consensual -- is perfectly acceptable, and even preferred. My boyfriend and I are in a committed, monogamous relationship, and we enjoy chastity play as a regular aspect of our intimacy.

Anyone curious can check us out on iTunes under 'Diary of a Dominatrix'. Here's the link directly to our latest podcast talking about what it's like to be the kind of couple we are.

Needless to say, it's an interesting life.

- M Roulette Chatelaine