What is a good length of time to go without a full orgasm?

I agree with you 100%. I am curious how it worked out for you when you were getting 3-4 per year. This is the number my wife wants to let me have. Did she space them out pretty evenly?

 

Whatever you agree between you

 

Sounds like you're problem is knowing. The books I've read suggest that we (lockees) should have hope for a release every time the cage comes off, but not get one every time. Not how my wife and I do it, but we are no where near your level.

 

The longest I’ve had to wait is a few 50-60 day stints, she usually grants me at least one per month. And she might give me a couple within a span of a couple days before making me wait a while again.
But she does like to give me a ruin every 2-3 weeks on average too.
I really look forward to the ruins more honestly, she gives me a nice teasing handjob and after a while she takes me just over the edge. I get some relief, it’s a great treat to look forward to and keeps me eager to please with zero sub drop.
I agree if there’s no rewards to look forward to, attitude and service would not be a priority, at least for me it wouldn’t.

 

If there is no hope for release, there is no excitement. If there is no excitement, there is no reason to be caged. If I decide to have no orgasm for months I don’t need a cage. My mind is enough for that. This is how I feel…

 

I fully agree... No reward(s) = No excitement! No excitement = No reason to continue!

Honestly, I just started the chastity tease & denial game about 3 months ago and don't see myself only getting release just 3 or 4 times per year... Not yet anyhow. But point is if you have nothing to look forward to, then it might be time to stop playing the game and find something else, or change it up enough to regain your excitement.

 

Sounds like you haven't accepted being chaste for her.

If the only thing that keeps you going is an orgasm then you need to go without an orgasm for much longer.

As I said here; If you stop having any sugar, then soon enough everything will taste sweet.

 

IMHO, I think we all need that "hope" of a release. I don't care if it's very unromantic. I get turned on sometimes when my wife just goes through the motions with the vibrator and lets me cum. I feel like she's servicing her slave! LOL

Some wives/KH etc don't like allowing us to release as we suffer from sub drop, some worse than others after we cum. That might be the reason for some. My wife has a few ways to cut down on my drop time which I hate!

 

Agree with this. Orgasms are irrelevant once you are content without having them. You need to find acceptance that this lifestyle isn’t driven by your needs.
There are greater pleasure than that momentary release.

Not so sure I agree so much with this. It’s about perspective. Some may feel a week is extreme, some may feel a month is extreme, a year could be outrageous…
You don’t need to give up sugar and replace your snacks with celery! You just need to understand that constantly craving sugar will ultimately lead to obesity.
It’s a treat that you don’t need, but you can still enjoy in moderation.

 

Errr-hem . . . ask your Wife / KH.
But I agree with everything above: there has to be at least the possibility of release / orgasm, otherwise there is no game.
For this reason I don't like 'fixed-term' lock-ups.
So it's either at the whim of your KH or something random like drawing marbles from a bag or rolling dice. Even if you win it doesn't necessarily guarantee an orgasm - that's still absolutely within your KH's gift. So it could be T&D, ruined, anal or timed masturbation.

 

Quite right. Celery is disgusting, and replacing your addiction with something else simply won't work anyway.

 

I can attest to that... I started chastity because I had a years-long porn addiction and a seemingly never ending jerking off habit But Chastity made my addiction explode! I did come out ahead (no pun intended) because I'm not wasting my time jerking off every day like I used to, so I'm more productive and I have more energy for tasks/projects as a result. That was my real goal for this game, but my porn addiction has definitely been exacerbated since I started. I've since accepted that's just part of who/what I am, so I'm not gonna make matters worse by fighting my own biology.

 

No need to accept it, you can break the cycle if you want.

Try seeing porn for what it is; If you are not jerking off and cumming then it is a total waste of your time, and worse than that it is a time thief that is stealing the one thing that you'll never get more of. Giving time to porn is possible the worst exchange you can make.

I'm also addicted to porn and have been for far too long, and the only solution I have found is the above truth, and to remove myself from my computer by doing real-world productive things.

 

That's what I meant by having more energy for tasks/projects. I still love watching porn, but if I have better things to do, believe me I will do them.

 

I’m sure I read the term ‘hyper sexual’ when you described yourself in your intro. It could be someone else, i could go back and check but that sounds like effort I am willing to give… anyway, I digress.

Anyway, when I read that I looked it up. More so ‘compulsive sexual disorder.’ Reading about it was like looking into a mirror… fuck, once I saw it for what it is it’s shameful. My wife always used to say that I’m obsessed with sex, the chastity is just another outlet for that. I had switched one addiction for another.

There was a symptom that struck a chord:

• You have trouble making and keeping healthy and stable relationships.

I didn’t realise just what a problem this ‘addiction’ is, but that made me think to all the times that my sexual needs have become a problem in my relationships. There was a lot of examples I could reflect upon, mostly driven by the scenes I have viewed in pornographry etc. Although I have no aim to throw chastity from our household for now. It did make me question myself. How could I do things better, how could I stop this interfering with the rest of my life.
I’m lucky, chastity 100% stops me enjoying wasting my time on porn so it has its benefits on that front.

The work I do now is to ensure that these sexual compulsions are harnessed and conveyed in a more acceptable and positive way for my wife.

I have no advice other than saying that it’s not something you should accept as part of you, it’s a problematic behaviour that is best understood and potentially eliminated. Replaced with something purer.

 

My situation is different than yours, but I do see your point. Thanks for your insight.

 

actually I like celery!

 

Well, of course

 

How long? Until you truly enjoy giving her an orgasm more than getting one yourself.

 

Since you asked for thoughts, your post sounds a bit petulant to me.

Honestly it makes me wonder: do you enjoy chastity or not?

Ideally, a "good" length of time would be that which gratifies both you and your partner. For us, that means I stay locked at my wife's discretion, and we're both quite happy that way.

 

That's probably the best answer... I do solo chastity, so my situation is a bit different, but that's still a great answer.

 

Don't see this as an one size fits all answer. I'm starting to like about every two weeks. A month ago would've said a week. Another couple months I might say a month. I'd say long enough to really be desperate and appreciate it. Not so long though you become resentful however.

 

Also a great answer!

When I first started about 3 months ago, I was only able to do a few days at a time and I've been gradually making my sessions longer as I go. My longest previous session was 12 days and I tied that just today. I'm trying to go for 20 days on this session, but I'll feel accomplished enough if I make it past 2 weeks. If I try to go longer than a month right I know I won't make it.

 

I've read you can go a month, you can go indefinitely. About halfway thru my longest lockup now of three weeks. I personally can't see wanting to go over a month but again who knows.