Groove re-entry

We had a long talk last night. In short she was not aware that she was delivering well on the penalty side of things and less on the reward side. I should have communicated a lot earliier. Nonetheless, it was a postive talk and we both came away with a better understanding and willingness to continue to improve our dynamic. Very happy.

Have a good Wednesday team.

 

11/5/19:
My KH remains committed to leading our marriage. I have had two sanctioned releases thus far for 2019. She has started booking monthly facial appointments and told me that I get to have a release whenever I pay for her to get a facial. For the first time ever she emailed members of our extended family with a change of plan for the Xmas period and did not copy me. When I mentioned that my sister had referenced the email in a text, my KH replied, "Hahahah you were not cc’d because it isn’t up to you! You are the servant!” I was so turned on by that, you have no idea.

She is pretty diligent about giving me weekly discipline spanking with a riding crop. She says that when I don’t have them, I am out of sorts and cheeky. This past Friday she went 6 more strikes more than normal. When I commented on it, she said, " I was really enjoying the sounds it made so I wasn’t even counting.” Quite incredible. This is from my wife who just a few years ago would not have dreamed of striking her husband. Now she relishes it. I have a love-hate relationship with my discipline sessions. Happy when they are done, not a fan when I know they are coming. It is quite often though that while on my knees sustaining the lashes, my cock strains in the cage. Not sure what the deal is with that wiring.

We have had a few arguments over the past few months or so. She now sends me to the bedroom to retrieve the crop and doles out a firm lashing to rectify my temperament right there and then. It is effective. It stops the argument in its tracks, we kiss and make up and speak further if needed. Most of the time further discussion is not needed as it truly was my rude behavior that needed some correction. I will often turn around and she will be standing there, hand on hip with one beautiful eyebrow arched. It makes me weak. The other day she let me feel her beautiful smooth ass beneath her nightshirt. It happens very seldom and is a real treat.

She is not ready to date anyone at this point. I am not pushing her to. I enjoy the fantasy of it for sure! When I have been allowed to masturbate while out of the cage, I flick through my digital photo album of pictures of my KH and imagine her on her hands and knees being fucked by a someone she finds incredibly hot while I watch.

She struggles to entertain my role play fantasies that I try and stimulate especially when I am traveling. She thinks if she plays along and says she wants to x,y and z, that I will have that expectation that she follow through in real life. I have assured her that the fantasy is the hot part and that I don’t expect her to have to deliver on any aspect of things unless she wants to, which may be never.

We went out recently with friends. She wore a latex dress and looked amazing. As we stood talking in the crowd of people, she pulled the zipper down in the front and back up a few times. Seeing her full breasts like that was quite incredible. She often wears tight leggings that amply show off her million Dollar camel toe. She knows how it drives me crazy. It’s hard not to stare. She is a beautiful woman. She sent me home at around 1am so I could rest before getting up with the kids. She had booked a hotel downtown. Our friends crashed in the hotel room while I waited for her to come home in our bed, hard as a rock. Nothing happened, but the visions of the possibilities was very titillating. It will be heaven when she is ready to find a FWB that she likes to hang out with and have sex with. The notion of having her FWB over to our house knowing that his cock enjoys my wife’s smooth pussy—one that I have only entered once this year—is quite heady. I am not sure how I will behave if something like this did transpire if the guy was super Alpha. Before our current relationship dynamic I was very dominant and she was my sub. Changing this role in the presence of another man would be interesting. Especially if my wife behaved as she currently does more or less openly in front of our friends and even her parents. She is quite bossy around them (but not in a mean way, that she receives for when we are alone).

Being a chaste man in a female led marriage is intoxicating. I want her to push the boundaries. I want to feel more subservient to her. I want her to continue relishing her dominance over me. I know that my ‘wants’ are for her to pick and choose. But, since this is my blog entry, thought it appropriate to share my dreams. I shared a picture of a man naked on his knees with a leash around his privates being held by a woman in heels. She said, "put a tray of cash in front of me, and we’ll do that." My next goal.

I have read on the site how couples in their 50s and 60s are discovering the joys of chastity and cuckolding. I am thankful we are exploring this together when she is just 40. I am excited about where we are and where we might go. I am still head over heels in love with my wife. I love everything about her. I have really tamed my impatience and truly letting her go at her own pace. Difficult for sure, but worth it.

 

11/27/19: This is an update in no particular sequence. Things are for the most part very good between my wife and I. She took it upon herself to order a pig whip off Amazon. This replaced the traditional riding crop she has been using. She tried it on me on Monday morning. I had just finished showering and she came in to have me kneel over the edge of the bed. It hurt.

I shared a picture of a guy who had been whipped while wearing a humbler. She ordered a humbler and we have yet to try it. Today, we took our youngest to downtown before I headed in to work. Later she admitted that she enjoys bossing me about in public. That is the first time she has every said that.

I know that she is making an effort for our FLM dynamic. We laugh a lot and enjoy being together. I still disappoint her with some lapses in judgement of mine. I am working hard on being more aware and thinking before I act on things.

Have a good Thanksgiving break all.

 

1/19/2020:

It has been a while since my last update in November last year. Over the Xmas break, we travelled to a holiday home and I did not have to wear my cage, which was a welcome break. Domina did not however ease up on her expectations and on a number of times was very pointed in front of friends and family when reprimanding or commanding me. I hate annoying my KH for real, but when she puts on that expectant air of a Domina needing service, it is the hottest thing ever.

Things were a little rough on re-entry in the new year with some communication challenges. I seem to manage to set her off easily, especially when we text. We have always prided ourselves on our fantastic communications, so this rough patch was a surprise to both of us. When we were in our old D/s dynamic where she was the sub, she was predominantly in a good mood; she was not permitted to be mad about things. Now that she is in charge, she can be mad, irritated, and ticked off at whatever she chooses and my job is to manage and re-direct when possible. It’s hard though when she is sincerely pissed off, especially first thing in the morning. I said (to my regret) that she seems disgruntled more often than not. This led to a long discussion and we resolved to actively work on our communication and FLM relationship.

I have been enormously content at taking things at her speed, especially since she is coming out of birthing and rearing our youngest toddler. While she is exceptional at doling out weekly discipline (care of lashes from the newly acquired pig whip) and has no issue at all at taking me to task over any misplaced attitude, I have begun to yearn for a little T in the Tease & Denial equation. I have been acutely aware that any interest from her in sexually teasing is in direct relation to how she is feeling about herself, physically. To this end, I have resisted any type of pressure, wanting her to find her own groove. I have really wanted some teasing from her when we text about things that relate somewhat to our lifestyle. She is going to the coast with some friends. She will have a good time, and deserves a break from the house and kids, specially since I have been traveling a bit for work with more coming up. When I tried to open up the chat about her going and possibly deciding to stay the whole weekend instead of just one night, she shut me down decisively. There have been occasions where she really does tease when we text and it’s blissful.

We had a date night Friday night. She looked amazing, poured into a tight pair of jeans and boots. She has not worn those jeans in a long time. She told me she felt good when I commented as much to her over dinner. She told me that Jack (married to Mary) had asked if she wanted to join them Saturday (last night) for a night out. I had just returned from a conference this past week, so was encouraging of her to head and out and cut loose. Well, last night/today was a first.

Driving home from our date night Friday, I honestly shared that I harbored no cuck fantasy or anything when being supportive of her going out with them. I truly wanted her to just enjoy some time out. I had initially put a lot of mental expectation into those sorts of fantasies when we first began this FLM dynamic several years ago. I have learned to temper things and let her find her own way. While I was taking the boys around to their extra-mural activities yesterday, she was at home relaxing, prepping, and deciding what to wear for the evening out. She texted me a few pics, and they blew me away. One was of her smooth, multiply pierced pussy. One that I adore, but have not seen close up for over a year. Our last PIV was in March 2019. The other was of her proposed outfit…open cleavage, and shirt tied off at the waist…daringly delicious. Tight black pants and heeled boots finished off her ensemble. Later she told me that when Jack had seen her outfit when she slipped off her coat at his house, he had said, ““holy shit, look how hot you look. There she is!” We texted back and forth on whether she should keep her wedding ring on or not relative to meeting other people (guys). It was the hottest FLM MC discussion we have had in years. I was giddy with happiness.

Lately, I started reading her blog postings online about hot wives and cucks before bed. She texted "Def the story about the hot wife going to Nashville got me thinking I should travel more!” I am a supporter!

She headed over to Jack and Mary’s place while I put the boys to bed. She told me she had hidden the key to my cage, so if I awoke in the night and needed to unlock, I would have to ask her. I normally stay up pretty much all night when she goes out, so that I can be awake to receive any text and pic updates. Not thinking that much would happen this evening other than her having a good night out, I armed the alarm, and turned in after reading a bit. I texted her that the house alarm was armed, and she responded, “Ok, B good to know. Will disarm should I come home. ” She hung out at their place waiting for another friend to arrive. I got a picture of her laying on Jack’s chest on the couch. I was thrilled she was feeling good and was enjoying her night off duty. Shortly after I turned off the light, she texted, “Jack wants to fuck my tits and cum on my face lol” My cock was hugely swollen in the cage as I drifted off to sleep with a massive smile on my face. I never egged her on, or anything…I was just supportive of her enjoying the time out and about.

At around midnight, I woke to for a bathroom break and checked my messages. They were heading back to Jack and Mary’s place she told me. I said she should have fun, and went back to sleep. At 3am when I awoke again to check the baby monitors to ensure the boys were good, my phone had blown up. The first text from my Key Holder simply read, “Things are going well.” A series of pictures followed. Her on her back with her long legs in the air, tight pants vanished. Mary was touching her smooth pussy and the friend had her finger in my wife’s ass. It was scorching stuff. The other stream of pictures were equally hot. She spun me even further texting, "I’m not sure what time I’ll be home at this rate lol maybe Tuesday.”

Knowing I needed the sleep, I forced myself to stop looking that the insanely hot pictures of my frisky wife enjoying herself. I had joked that it was so hot to see them enjoying her natural assets that I am prohibited from accessing! At 5am, just before the boys stirred, I got another text. Two pictures. The first was Jack’s cock in my Domina’s mouth. The second was his hand placed in a proprietary manner over my wife’s smooth and naked pussy with her legs spread. My cock was raging! Two more pics of Mary and her friend licking my wife. It was out of this world hot!

I thanked her for the amazing pics and told her again how smoking hot she is and that I was thrilled she was having a good time. She texted back, "Hahah lol I’m just going to stay here until we leave for the beach.” She is going to the coast with Jack and Mary et al next week. I commended her on her exceptional level of tease! The friend apparently commented to my wife, “You’re so lucky to have a partner who supports you going out and doesn’t make you feel bad about it.” We chuckled about that via text. If she only knew the half of it!

Her next text was a pleasant surprise. "I’m so glad you were able to stay locked all night B.” That made me smile. I have not heard from her again in the last two hours, but she may well be staying with them to watch the football game.

What a night. What an amazing experience especially having had zero expectations at all. She just let loose in her way and enjoyed things her way. I love her to bits. She will be wiped out when she comes home, but she will be able to turn in with a hot water bottle that she likes me to make for her.

xxxHC

 

1/20/20: She came home at 9pm last night, and was, predictably wiped out. I made her water bottle and got her cup of water. She showered and climbed into bed. I fell asleep so horny knowing that her delectable frame had been enjoyed by others the night before and I was denied from even touching it. This is an amazing journey as she learns what works for her as my KH.
xxxHC

 

I noted a post in the forum where someone linked to this blog written from a Key Holder's perspective. She drills into the heart of the matter that challenges many of us--challenges me--when we willingly hand over the key:

"Chores are begrudgingly completed, massages happen but he is clearly unhappy and neither of them is seeing the result that she expected. Things just aren’t working. So what went wrong?"

If I can crassly generalize, after the initial expectant euphoria of surrendering to one's wife, there is in many cases a lull. During that lull the newly entitled wife reads, experiments, engages, and probes before going whole hog into it realizing the multiple benefits of a female led relationship where the male is controlled via imposed chastity. Alternatively, that lull....extends into a valley of status quo.

Initially my wife was reluctant at switching our dynamic, 180 degrees...literally. But over time she enjoyed the new-found authority. It worked well for her since she had recently given birth and had little interest in sex. With our FLM / MC relationship she could stop in any advances in their track. I was okay with that. I realize that male chastity was a way for me to turn this abstinence into a kink. In my previous marriage of 14 years, I seethed at the lack of physical intimacy or interest.

I, like many on this site, shared books, links, and articles with my Key Holder in an effort to assure her that this could be positive, to let her know what makes this work for me, and how she can exert her authority and discipline in ways that she might have held back on.

I will say once again, before any howls of protest that once I offer the key I should have zero expectations, etc. etc., I do not subscribe to that. In the same way she was my submissive for a decade and I knew her submission was a gift to me, I see it the same way in reverse. Others who manage things differently…power to you.

My KH is very efficient at administering weekly discipline by way of a painful whip, and exerting her will on the run of the house. The sentence in the Evolving your Man blog post, "Time doesn’t really matter as long as the teasing is frequent and merciless” really hit home. My teasing is intermittent at best and I know this is causing some resentment. I realize why. My wife has none of her circuits firing on the sexual front as a mother of a toddler and in the throes of reclaiming her body. So that leaves us in limbo a bit. I love serving and pleasing her and have patiently waited over the past two years. It’s possible it may not return, or at least not for another few years. So in the end, yes…I will admit…rubbing her feet at the end of a day without a glimmer of teasing is indeed more of a chore than something I jump to with alacrity.

Time will tell. She does not visit this site or engage in the community. That’s fine, it is her prerogative, just wish she would engage in some way other than just the whip.

 

3/24/20: We are entering our second week of shelter in place at home. It is stressful as we homeschool our eldest and manage the youngest all the while trying to keep working.

Yesterday my KH was in quite the mood. I have never seen such consistent and continuous female-led behavior from her. She was forceful but careful around the kids. She had me bathe and put our youngest to bed while she took care of our oldest. Once they were in bed, she came roaring into our bedroom. She administered the pig whip on my ass until huge welts rose up. She had me roll over and whipped my caged cock. It was scary and hot all at the same time.

Before I was allowed into bed, she had me fold all of the laundry barking orders as she reclined on our bed. She often muttered, "I ought to whip your ass again!" I was never sure if she was serious, so did her bidding with the greatest speed possible.

A wonderful thing then happened. She allowed me to hug her in a spooning position while I remained locked. We drifted off like that together. It was pure heaven.

This morning she said we can hug anytime like that just as long as my cock was safely locked away and could not get up to any mischief.

It was a deliciously provocative display of her sheer dominant force that has not emerged to the same extent before.

xxxHC

 

Things have been quiet over the summer amidst the virus & shelter-in-place provision. My KH released me from the cage back in March. It has been nice to freely have unfettered erections.

The last time we had PIV was more than a year ago. I like to tease her that the next time she has penetrative sex, it will be (hopefully) be with another cock other than mine.

She has developed a few habits that I like a lot. These include giving me a hand-on-hip stern eye when she is unhappy about something. She also likes to do it to simply give me a rise. She likes to smack my balls and cock through my trousers. She ordered key-shaped earrings and a necklace that she really likes to wear. She is designing me my next tattoo! ....an anchor with a lock, which is pretty exciting. I have encouraged her to think about the design to clearly denote I am her sub.

She also wears some serious camel toe leggings that have me captivated. Sometimes she will text provocative things about one day dating someone. She still calls me B for boy or bitch.

Yesterday she texted me while I was working..."Want to wax my box for me B? So it’s nice and bald just in case for Friday ; )" It was great! She is going out with friends (social distancing/masks etc) for drinks on the patio at a local pub. Obviously with COVID, NSA sex is way off the table, but she is good at getting me going!

It was heaven to have her lay naked from the waist down on the bed with her legs parted so I could get on my knees next to the bed to wax her pussy. The smell of it was DIVINE! It has been ages since I last had the chance to smell her and it is something I adore.

I was all business though. I know she doesn't appreciate everything turning into a sexual escapade so with efficiency I had her waxed smooth quickly. It was a good thing I was kneeling so that she could not see my raging hard on as I thought about how hot it was that I was waxing my wife's pussy before she headed out for fun on Friday night while I stayed home to mind the kids.

Cuck life. Good life.

xxxHC