I thought she was the One, then she disappeared into the oblivion from whence she came. In tears I retrace the posts and reread them over and over. Did I show disrespect, do something wrong? Nothing would indicate that, at least from what I can discern. So I wait again...looking within to refine the way I submit my request for a keyholder. I wonder why the drive for enforced chastity seems so strong, why the 'freak' side of things seems to fit me like a glove. Why in a world where it is normal and healthy to masturbate, I am the abnormal one who finds it detestable and abnormal..yet I cannot stop. How I long to be held accountable to another. My inner desires so needing to give the control of that part of my life away. In fact giving myself totally is the ultimate goal. So I wait patiently, perhaps an online holder will surface, or even a local will surface and a relationship will flourish. Until then I abide in desire and hope that One will see me, One will provide the firm and delicious dominance that will help shape me into the person I was born to be.
On whether you did anything wrong. I doubt it. Sometimes things happen to people that other people don't know about. There could be many reasons someone could suddenly stop posting or stop communicating.
thank you for the encouragement. It is so frustrating. It has been years in the making and now finally single and ready to live the life I was born to live. Not wanting to appear desperate, but with anticipation and desire. I know the ration of male subs to female Dommes is very high, so I continue to wait.