Excited with reservations

[Forsake]

My girlfriend of nearly two years has recently brought up chastity. Or rather, she’s been bringing it up occasionally and I recently ‘fessed up about my fantasies. She’s known about my interest in it chastity since about 3 months into our relationship, albeit vaguely.

I was open with my other kinks when we were sharing them but she knew I was holding something back. When I finally did muster the courage to tell her about chastity she instantly perked up. She immediately asked “Who gets to hold the key? Do I hold the key?” All why smiling—she already knew what chastity was, I didn’t have to explain it!

We played around with chastity some but it was short lived. I had previously pulled out of the ball trap devices so the illusion of chastity was shattered before I even met her. I also wasn’t entirely comfortable being in a submissive position. Regardless, I ended up pulling out and masturbating, she could tell. Afterward, she had negative feelings about the chastity (rightfully so) and we didn’t pursue it further.

That was fine with me, I’ve mostly just fantasized about it; it’s never been a part of my relationships in the past.

We’ve been doing the long distance thing since December, seeing each other when we can, but I’m working nights, she’s on days, and it’s a 4 hour flight. The distance has been a challenge and we’ve been trying to spice things up.

There’s been a lot more phone sex, FaceTime, masturbating together, dirty talk, more communication too. She’s doing a lot to bring me out of my shell and I’ve felt comfortable enough to finally give her a strait answer when she brings up chastity. I’ve mentioned about a piercing once or twice before. And she knew that the chastity cages I’ve got aren’t secure.

So, after asking about chastity again she just strait up asked me if we need to visit a tattoo parlor when she comes up to visit in July. She asked me if I want her to be there for a PA piercing.

The timing is actually perfect. It wouldn’t impact our sex life as it’ll be about a month before I’d fly home to visit her again. The long distance would give it time to heal/stretch.

Anyway, we talked about chastity. She gets off to the idea of me in chastity, her on top of me masturbating, with me eating her out. That kind of thing. We discussed some logistics about being in chastity I can’t get out of. It sounds like I’d things were to progress to the point where I’d be in a chastity cage secured with a PA that I’d be wearing it unless she wanted to play with my (her??) penis. Like, only let out at her discretion. Which is what I want, I think.

Fuck, the idea of not being able to get off without her is so intoxicating. Not being able to masturbate without her allowing it. Being so horny that I’d do anything she wants to please her.

I asked her some days later if she was serious about the chastity, and she said yes. I know she’s had some insecurities about this long distance thing. I don’t know what’s driving this now, if she likes the idea of me in chastity for that reason. She said that she wants me in chastity any time I’m not with her.

I think I’m going to pursue the PA. Do it with her while she’s here visiting. By the time my contract work is done and I’m back home for good it should be healed and stretched, or at least most of the way to being able to be used with chastity. I’ve got some concerns about having to travel again and her not being with me. I don’t think she’s going to want me to have a spare key but it isn’t practical.

Suppose we’ll see in a few weeks how things proceed!

 

[tomf_22033]

Congrats.
I got a PA a few months ago and love it.
I will say going with her is a great idea. My partner and I went and had a blast. In fact anytime I’ve been pierced I’ve gone with a partner and had loads of fun.

 

[boo]

first things first. Get the P A with her it should be a very intimate expierience. Heal up or stretch, find a good cage then see what happens.

 

[Nicoftime]

My girlfriend (now wife) was very adamant about the piercing if we were to continue the cage. She went with, took me out to dinner after.

She as also under the impression that I should always remain caged unless she wants to use it. I think it was more about guaranteed fidelity more than the kink aspect, nonetheless she is very much into keeping me locked.

 

[JaySaysYes]

That sounds really great. It's very exciting

uck, the idea of not being able to get off without her is so intoxicating. Not being able to masturbate without her allowing it. Being so horny that I’d do anything she wants to please her.

Oh boy are you in for it.

When I introduced chasitity to my GF we were living apart, just two hours drive, and were seeing each other every weekend, more or less. I had a piercing and had cages, and she was INSTANTLY interested in it, and wanted the keys.

A couple of months later she had bnought a badassworkroom cage with piercing attachment and that was that. SHe also bought a timed lock box to avoid all temptation.

Longest so far was 70 days without the key in the lock and it was mind bending. Currently 40 days into an indefinite time but with a minimum of 90 days.

We're both very much enjoying it, but fuck I want an erection and an orgasm so badly haha.

 

[Forsake]

That sounds really great. It's very exciting



Oh boy are you in for it.

When I introduced chasitity to my GF we were living apart, just two hours drive, and were seeing each other every weekend, more or less. I had a piercing and had cages, and she was INSTANTLY interested in it, and wanted the keys.

My girlfriend’s interest in chastity kind of waxes and wanes. From past conversations about it she thinks of it on a spectrum from “weird” to “arousing and interesting” based on her mood. It’s understandable, post-nut clarity has me feeling a similar way about it too.

She had prior experience with chastity from a man she dated that was a lot more forward with his desires and kinks. That guy did some heavy lifting with breaking the ice but he was also into things that I’m not (like pegging, cuckholding too maybe?) which my girlfriend found (I think) off putting. The femdom aspect of it appeals to her more so than it does to me as she’s got a dominate streak in her too. Our sexual relationship has entirely consisted of her in a submissive role though, the one to be tied up and played with, in bondage, etc.

My girlfriend gets pretty impatient when we’re getting close to having sex, doesn’t have the patience for bondage most of the time and when she gets her way would rather just have sex as opposed to trying to tie me up. I don’t think she’s ever really gotten to fully explore her dominate side, certainly not within our relationship. That’s why I’m pretty optimistic that chastity for us would mostly be about orgasm control, but ultimately that’d be up to her.

She can be a little irrational and emotional sometimes too, and I’d hesitate to be at her mercy locked in enforced chastity when she has a problem at work or a family drama that leaves me locked and forgotten for a few days. I know that isn’t a long time and it’s just something I’ll need to accept. From our conversation, it sounds like there’d be no chance of me being released when she doesn’t feel like having sex too. Essentially, no more masturbating without her.

I’m trying not to overwhelm her by talking about it as much as I’d like to and recognize the state things are in are good and wheels are in motion. Hell, chastity has been on my mind damn near constantly since our open discussion about it. I’d like nothing more than for her to share my enthusiasm but I know I just need to be patient and let this happen, let her discover for herself her likes and dislikes while we navigate this together at her pace.

The community here (I’ve been lurking and reading for quite some time) is so very supportive and open too. I think that’s why I’m starting a journal, from a need to express my thoughts without nagging my girlfriend. Maybe as a way to share them with her at a later time too.

I’m also hopeful a PA is going to enforce orgasm control. I know now that once chastity is defeated the illusion is ruined. I’ll have to have that discussion with her too, months from now when we’re at a point where she gets the keys.

I’ve read that once locked with a PA, chastity has become “real” for many couples. I’m hopeful that once secured, it’ll be more about dealing with the frustration and horniness constructively rather than using chastity as foreplay/a way to get aroused. I know I need to not defeat the cage by forcing an orgasm while in it. Not being able to pull out will be enough, and I’m resolved use the chastity anyway she wants to, to let her take the lead.

 

[PinkCB2000Boy]

My then girlfriend (now keyholder-wife) was also very adamant about the PA piercing if we were going to integrate chastity into our relationship. She scheduled the appointment, went with me and got an industrial piercing with me at the same time.

I absolutely love my PA ring. I was pierced at a 10 gauge but had them install an 8 gauge CBR. I out of commission for about 4 weeks but it was worth it.

 

[Wanderer]

My wife and I are going to be trying out chastity here soon. It will be mostly when I travel. We have puchased a changable combination lock box which will have a spare key in it that I will carry with me. If I need out she can give me the combination to the box and change it for the next trip. That might work for your situation also. You could simply spin the dial randomly while she watches on video and then lock the key up. She would know the combination but you would not.

 

[LesterBallard]

Good luck with it

 

[Deleted member 92920]

Piercing your dick to be encaged permanently is pure sacrifice.. she would love you for that. I get the feeling she is a no nonsense lady.. can be very assertive and dominant given time.. she doesnt have much patience with elaborate teasing and bondage stuffs.. sex is only with her.. whats the point of even erection when away from her..? You are living the dream.. keep her.

 

[Shepherdsflock]

Back when my wife and I were still together, she was against any piercings but wanted me locked all the time. I think some partners don't feel comfortable with the idea of putting extra holes in their partner's penis. I guess it's fair, but I would have preferred a piercing so that the temptation to pull out couldn't easily be acted upon. Resisting that was the hardest part.

 

[Forsake]

A short update.

My girlfriend has arrived and we’re currently vacationing together by touring parks. There was a speed bump earlier in the week though. She had broken my trust going through my phone regarding text messages with a coworker. Her feeling is that this coworker is seeking male attention, doesn’t like that I’ve texted her back. The content of the messages aren’t unfaithful, and I don’t necessarily agree with her feelings of this coworker of mine. Certainly, there haven’t been any passes made that would elicit an appropriate rejection. I certainly don’t want to come off as a pearl-clutcher spouting “I have a girlfriend!” when I get invited out to a lake for a Fourth of July party and whatnot. I politely declined anyway, that just isn’t my thing.

I think a lot of this is insecurity stemming from the problems of a long distance relationship. Regardless, this coworker poses no threat to my girlfriend’s place in my life. There was a huge argument and subsequent resolution, and quite a bit of making up.

My girlfriend let me tie her up, tease her/force her to orgasms. She brought one of our toys with her up here, a cock ring with a vibrating egg on it. It works pretty well when you position the egg portion up against your partner’s clit while inside of her. I’m lucky in that it’s very easy for my girlfriend to have multiple orgasms one after the other once that first one comes.

We’ve been going at it like rabbits. I don’t know if it has been the anticipation of some real chastity or a multitude of other factors. We had to drive for a few hours to get to this other national park today and she brought up getting a piercing for the second time this visit.

Logistically, Sunday makes the most sense. She flies back home Tuesday but I don’t think that most parlors are open Monday, and we’d both like to do this together.

We discussed chastity some more too. She was under the impression it would be usable for chastity relatively soon, and didn’t think I could be in chastity for a month at a time that we spend apart—she says I cannot go that long without masturbating, and isn’t wrong. I explained that the process would take months. Currently, my tentative work plans are to return home I’m November, and between the stretching/healing process, and getting a suitable cage ordered, probably would be able to use the piercing for chastity not long after we’re under the same roof again.

I imagine between ordering a cage (would probably get some measurements from one of the better fitting ball trap devices I’ve got when I fly home for a visit in August, then ordering one from badass workroom) and getting used to chastity again, it might be late December or early into the new year before it’s time to give her the keys.

I don’t know what kind of lock schedule she’d have in mind when that day does come. That’s a ways away anyway, for now, a piercing is first. I’ll update again when the deed is done.

 

[Forsake]

So, we did it! She got her nipples pierced and I the Prince Albert. We were discussing it Sunday; she called around after I asked her to look up APP shops, and ended up booking the appointment for Monday.

Now that it’s done the whole thing feels surreal—it’s as if I haven’t quite processed that it’s done and it could have been an elaborate dream. Presently I’m running on a sleep deficit, her too, so that is probably contributing. There’s been a lot of driving around and early mornings/late nights with this vacation of ours. The whole rest of the trip has been amazing though. We feel closer than ever having spent this time time together, in some amazing places to boot! Sadly, our time together is coming to a close—she’s slated to fly home this morning.

She really took the lead with the whole process of discussing getting the piercing and scheduling the appointment. There were concerns about the piercing messing up my dick, more along the lines of if it’s not broken don’t fix it—a mutual concern. As the research seems to indicate, it’s a relatively easy piercing to get with few complications, and the benefits of enhanced pleasure she’s excited about too. All this she’s read for herself.

She had mentioned getting her nipples pierced a few times in the past and had decided if we were going to be getting the PA, then she’d get piercings too. She was nervous and giddy leading up to the appointment with a concern that she’d get one piercing and not go through with the other if it was too painful. I think her anxiety leading up to it really overshadowed mine because it didn’t really hit me until it was time to leave the house and we were on the way to the piercer.

She was adamant on going first, didn’t want to be psyched out watching mine but wanted the support and pressure to go ahead and get everything done at once. I expressed my anxiety driving down, which previously hadn’t been present. She told me if I chickened out after she got her piercings she was going to be so mad at me, lol. It was just her nerves talking.

The piercer was very professional, and my girlfriend took the piercings like a champ. Myself, not as much, or a little less than her given the perspective. What I had read going into it was that the pain wasn’t too bad, and that for some guys the receiving tube was the worst. That wasn’t my experience.

The piercing felt like I had gotten the skin under the glans caught in a zipper, except leaving it zipped up during the whole process. I suspect that’s a sensation most guys have had once then taken care to never have again. The receiving tube was less than pleasant but not the worst of it. I was given the choice to sit or lay down; I chose the latter. It ended up being the right choice because I probably would have had to lay down for a bit anyway. I suspected I vasodilated some in response to everything. The pain wasn’t anything unbearable, I just wasn’t prepared for it. The focus was really on my girlfriend before so maybe I just wasn’t in the correct headspace, regardless, clenching and just taking the pain was fine.

After, she drove us to a restaurant to eat after as I wasn’t quite feeling up to driving. I caught her with this expression on her face a few times, like she was feeling like such a little badass. I love this woman for her ability to surprise me even two years into this relationship with her little idiosyncrasies. Thinking about it now, while she’s sleeping, makes me sad knowing I’m going to be missing her again for another 4 weeks before I fly home for a visit.

The whole complication of bleeding has been minimal, probably totaling less than 3-4mL so far, unless there was more the piercer cleaned up. I had initially planned to have a meal the day prior with foods high in vitamin K, ended up having a ton of asparagus and quite a bit of cheese in some mashed potatoes with the steak. I don’t know if that was of sufficient quantity but given the positive outcome, I’d suggest it. I’m optimistic that will continue to be the case as I’ve peed thrice, showered, cleaned the site, and the piercing has handled erections (trying not to get them) just fine.

My girlfriend’s presence isn’t helping that last matter. She looks amazing with her nipples pierced, and it’s an immediate turn on just looking at her nude. She’s opted for no bra and kept lifting her shirt to admire her breasts and flash me. I was told open air is best so I had just been pooh-bearing it last afternoon. She had been sitting across the room just rubbing herself while checking out my piercing. Suffice it to say, the PA isn’t a turnoff for her.

The piercing itself is okay. From what I’ve read about placement for use in chastity, mine is pretty close to the glans, or rather, a position more set back is preferred. The piercer felt that closer was better to accommodate changes in size due to erections. Ultimately, he’s the professional, and I’m confident in his judgement after talking with him. It’s as much midline as anatomy will allow, at least compared to most other piercings I’ve seen. I’ll give it some time to heal and become established as I know I’m prone to over-researching a subject, having this perfect outcome in my mind, then being discontent with anything less.

All of this is moot anyway. The next step is to facilitate healing, 6-12 weeks the piercer estimates for mine, 9 months for my girlfriend’s nipples—ouch. I’m at an 8 gauge presently, will have to consider the plan for chastity over the coming weeks. The piercer’s advice was to return to the shop when it’s time to change jewelry. I think I’ll purchase the next size ring from the shop when it’s time but order my own set of ring pliers to do the exchange myself. My girlfriend expressed that she prefers the look of bar bells, and there’s some other jewelry more focused on her pleasure she is interested in trying in the future too. I’m all for it.

I haven’t decided yet to extend my work contract past mid august yet. The thought of going home is appealing, but given the financial state of things, some added job security is nice too. My girlfriend has expressed multiple times she is wanting to become engaged too, so working a bit more for a ring would be nice. November will be the absolute latest I’ll stay here though, so once I return it would be nice to have ordered and have ready PA compatible chastity and begin with that around that time, if possible.

My girlfriend has also been talking about chastity a lot more, without my prompting. I think she’s been thinking about it more than I had realized. She’s also been enjoying teasing me too. I’ve asked her if the idea of chastity makes her feel empowered and got a “well obviously” response. I’m incredibly excited about what the future will hold for us.

I’ll leave this update for now as it’s getting close to time for her to wake up and we’ve got a trip to the airport in a couple of hours.

 

[Forsake]

It’s so frustrating. I’ve tried and tried to masturbate with this PA in but the current state of healing doesn’t allow for the stimulation I need to even get close. My girlfriend got herself off on FaceTime with her vibrator and has been teasing me, saying how I’m going to have to get used to not cumming. She’s enjoying my frustration in this regard, getting off to it even.

She asked me today if I had looked into any “contrapments” yet. I’d like to be at the point of using a chastity cage again because it will mean this piercing will be done healing but if she’s looking forward to it so much then what does that say about what she’s got in mind? We haven’t actually discussed how chastity is going to be handled. I know she wants the keys and wants orgasms without her to be impossible. Beyond that, who knows….

The PA is still quite tinder. I hope as it heals it’ll become less so, but I’ve read men will sometimes have to size up for comfort to improve.

I’m working the next six nights so that’ll be helpful in keeping my mind off this predicament I’ve put myself in.

 

[Deleted member 92920]

Whoa.. but why would want to masturbate with a pa.. stop touching your dick for some moment.. no body would attempt to masturbate after circumcision either.. tell your gf to keep her horniness to herself while you are going through some 7th level nirvana celibracy training.. she can tease and torment you till kingdom come once you healed.. but warn her… she will get the ultimate pounding on her little flesh.. pound for pound for whatever torment she tries to inflict.. if you ever get up dick up again..

 

[Forsake]

Whoa.. but why would want to masturbate with a pa.. stop touching your dick for some moment.. no body would attempt to masturbate after circumcision either.. tell your gf to keep her horniness to herself while you are going through some 7th level nirvana celibracy training.. she can tease and torment you till kingdom come once you healed.. but warn her… she will get the ultimate pounding on her little flesh.. pound for pound for whatever torment she tries to inflict.. if you ever get up dick up again..

Eh, I don’t see any problem as long as it isn’t hurting. Problem is, that pretty much relegates stimulation to the base and limits any movement of skin, which really doesn’t result in anything productive. Not like I’m tugging on the tip or stimulating the fernulum / piercing.

Alas, if I had better self control likely I wouldn’t have gotten interested in chastity.

 

[madams-sissysub]

Thanks for sharing.

 

[Forsake]

An update TLDR: The PA is healing well. The long distance is coming to an end. My girlfriend has been feeling empowered and acting more kinky lately.

The piercing is healing well. It’s no longer bothersome and I’m beginning to enjoy it. I haven’t had to urinate outside yet but from what I can tell from in the shower it wouldn’t be too much of a problem to use a bush while outdoors, a urinal would be fine too. I often sit at home and work in order to prevent splashing as I’m tall. Ejaculations seem like they’re prolonged too, a nice little benefit. Today marks a little over 3 weeks of healing and I’m wondering if PIV will be possible by next week when I fly home for a few days. The piercer said four to six weeks to heal, we’ll see on week 4 I suppose.

Work wise the contract they offered was a significant pay decrease, so the lady and I discussed the pros and cons, decided I’d decline the offer and return home. I’ve accepted a job about 15 minutes from her house, less stress, more autonomy, it’d be like switching specialties though. The pay isn’t great but the flexibility and decrease in stress is going to be worth it. It’ll be a day shift position too!

She says she doesn’t want us to do the long distance thing ever again. It’s been a strain on the relationship and has amplified some of her insecurities. We’ve been working hard on our communication too and we will be coming out of this relationship a stronger couple.

I don’t know what has gotten into her but she’s been acting so kinky lately. The nipple piercings have emboldened her and it’s coming out in a variety of ways. She’s ordered a lot (I think) of lingerie, some other kinky things, she’s vague about some of it but she sent me a picture of herself in two of the items, and a screenshot of a few items that’ve shipped.

Hell, her in this lingerie is probably one of, if not the hottest picture I’ve ever seen. It’s a full body mirror pic of her wearing this black, lace one piece number with the nipples cut out, came with a little silky looking waist/thigh harness in the garter belt style, with some silver rings attaching the fabric together. She’s wearing nothing else. She’s tall to begin with, with more leg than any woman has a right to have, and they’re on full display. Her torso is pulling the lingerie slightly taught vertically, elongating the nipple cutouts. Her piercings are acting like toggles. Her hand is on her hip, the other holding her phone, which she’s looking at. The phone is illuminating her face ever so slightly, and her face is probably the best part of it all. You can tell she likes what she’s seeing, is smiling at herself, eyebrows slightly raised, face open, hair pulled back, looking like she’s imagining herself doing something while in this outfit. Maybe one day I’ll share this journal with her and ask her if it be okay to hide her identity and share this pic. Pictures are worth a thousand words, after all.

She told me she felt empowered in the lingerie and it spurred her to order more. A body harness, some item with cuffs and chains, I’m not sure what else though. She’s vague and wants it to be a surprise. She wants to be tied up soon too, wants me to “fuck her up” as she puts it. Her terminology for being restrained, helpless.

She tells me I take too long with the rope, that the knots have to be all perfect and she’s just there waiting, getting impatient. That’s her way of saying she wants to use the leather cuffs, objectively, I don’t think I take too long getting her tied. I’m hoping the piercing is healed enough for some PIV but she very much enjoys oral and fingering too. That’s not even mentioning the vibrators.

I’ve asked her if she’s still going to want to be tied up on occasion if I’m in chastity. Yes, she’s said, but I’ll stay in my chastity unless she wants me out . From what she’s said about it, it sounds like it isn’t coming off unless she wants PIV. She’d be enjoying teasing me for the days after the piercing when masturbation wasn’t possible… getting herself going while thinking/talking about it. She’s brought up chastity a few times too, I think she’s eager to have that control. Yikes!

I think once I’m home and we’re fooling around some, we’ll discuss chastity and order one off badass workroom after measuring. I’ll likely make a forum post if I can’t find specifics for some advice.

Attached is the screenshot she sent me from one of the orders she’s placed! Exciting!

 

[Forsake]

An update on things:

7 weeks out from the PA piercing. There are occasional twinges of pain but it’s been infrequent. I can’t tell for sure but I think the ring has enlarged the meatus slightly.

The long distance has come to an end, I’ve moved in with my girlfriend, started a job in a different speciality near her place. Everything is still new and we really haven’t established concrete routines. This isn’t the first time we’ve lived together but that was in a neutral apartment in another city—this has still been an adjustment for both of us.

She likes the piercing. Sometimes she’ll grab it through my underwear just to hold it in place and she’ll make me say “please” before she’ll let go, or just go feeling around until she finds it. Chastity has been on the back burner while prioritizing more important things. Once everything is settled I’ll probably involve her with getting a device of the correct dimensions ordered.

A subject of annoyance has been penile numbness resulting from this used road bike I purchased. Apparently this can happen with ergonomic issues related to the seat shape and position. It hasn’t entirely caused ED but it’s certainly a hinderance. I plan on taking the bike to the shop and looking for a new seat/having the professionals have a look at the positioning. Never had this issue with mountain bikes, but then one is out of the saddle quite a bit in dirt.

I’ll probably hold off on further updates until some chastity related news can be shared. I feel like much of this is really off topic.

Until then,

 

[Forsake]

Well, I sat down and measured everything, more than twice, and ordered a BA-25. Metal bar style chastity is appealing for the hygienic aspect. A metal one I got off Amazon was my favorite, just not very secure, of the various plastic and resin cages used. I think I might have preferred the BA-28 because it’d be easier to clean but when I showed my girlfriend different options she wanted the one with more bars. She told me “you’re just going to try to touch yourself if you have the space.” She’s right, of course.

Lately, she’s been asking if I ordered the new device, perhaps two to three times a week. I’ve been noncommittal, siting healing times with this PA piercing or other things as barriers to taking the plunge. Admittedly there have been other issues, more important things such as work, which is going well.

Chastity is, of course, a huge kink. This is how we are though. Her a little pushy, me, a bit shy and hesitant. It balances out between us. The piercing is pretty much in a state it can be played with by her without any pain. Erections have become involuntary when she grabs hold of the ring, there’s no hiding I like her taking control.

This is probably what has caused her to ask when I’ll order the chastity with this latest time being different, more of a “it’s time”. I told her I’d do it Friday when she asked earlier in the week, after work. We had argued a little bit the night before, and she was being nice and had dinner ready when I got home. Yesterday, she reminded me I said I’d order it. I hadn’t forgotten, but I needed the extra push, so now it’s done.

The timing has me a bit worried. A little argument like the one the night before can become really one sided. I don’t like the idea of not being on equal footing in the relationship. The entire concept of being in chastity while arguing with one’s keyholder is unappealing. Certainly she wouldn’t release me from chastity while pissed, or upset. Does that remove her motivation to make up, when she’s in the wrong? Does that reinforce a pattern of behavior? Am I overthinking this, I wonder? Chastity will be a constant status for me but it’s not like much will change for her…

She’s said before the PA piercing that if we’re doing this then it’s all the way. She’ll only let me out of chastity on her terms, and I’m going back in after she’s done. I’m wondering if this will truly be the case. My plan is to become used to chastity again, and then hand over the keys once I am. Maybe as a Christmas present? The timing may work out that way.

She’s teased me before that she isn’t going to unlock it unless I’m tied up. I doubt this will be the case all of the time but she’ll certainly be able to dictate what she wants. The choice of do what she wants or remain in chastity if not isn’t much of a decision. She’s always been the one that ends up in bondage, which is also a kink of ours. I’ve asked before if she’s still going to let me restrain her and she’s said yes, and when asking how it’d work with chastity she’s told me I don’t need to be free to tie her up. Yikes!

I’m so nervous, and excited. Nervous to hand over such leverage to her, to give her that level of control. Excited because it’s been such a fantasy finally coming to a reality.

On an unrelated subject, she’s been wanting me to propose to her, and I would rather do it prior to chastity becoming a thing between us. So perhaps in the coming weeks I’ll do that, or at least we can maybe go ring shopping together.

I don’t expect anything else new regarding chastity to come up until this device arrives so I don’t expect I’ll update this further for a couple of months.

 

[Forsake]

The mood this morning is nervous. The past two evenings and more often than not prior to that my girlfriend is asking when the new chastity cage will arrive. Once or twice she’s asked if we need to put one from the drawer on but my feeling is that they’re not effective and the clanging of the PA’s captive bead ring isn’t appealing. I’ve also been looking at this time as likely the last I’ll be able to freely masturbate. The ease that those devices are defeated just presents a temptation and giving in would only put her off of playing with chastity as has happened before.

A package arrived of similar size last weekend, and she opened it out of excitement. Never has she opened my mail or packages before but she did so with glee. When she saw it was some solar projector, a gift for my goddaughter, she was disappointed, and that has sparked some impatience and gotten her thinking about chastity more than before.

She’s told me that once it arrives it’s going on. I expressed some concerns, how long she’ll keep it on, being locked and ignored, being locked in chastity all the rest of the time like during an argument, or when she’s in a mood. She said it’s staying on until she’s ready to use “her dick”, that she won’t forget or ignore me, and not to worry, that she’ll let me cum frequently to start (meaning she already has plans to increase the time denied???) and we’ll have a safe word.

I don’t know if she’s been looking into male chastity or if she’s just had time to think about how chastity for us and already decided on the the semi-permanent option. Regardless, I’m excited. This truly is a fantasy made reality. I just hope the chastity cage fits well enough to wear continuously.

 

[Forsake]

It’s a conflicting prospect to be waiting to begin chastity with your mate. We’re both excited about the pending arrival of a cage I can’t pull out of. She asks frequently if there’s an update on shipping, and I know she fantasizes about what she’ll do with the control. I want that motivation to be submissive, to remove my selfishness out of the equation. At the same time, I’m finding I’m masturbating much more than I should the closer the yet unknown arrival date gets.

I’d equate it to somebody overeating knowing they’ll be on a diet sooner rather than later. Does overindulging harm oneself? I’m thinking that it does. It seems I’m less prone to be tolerant of the minor annoyances in a relationship after masturbating. Will chastity curb that altogether, will it fill a kink, shift the balance of power, improve our relationship more?

If it does, what am I in for? I’ve read the dozens of accounts of the men on here who are no longer practicing chastity, but living it. Controlled to the degree that they no longer have any input on when they can orgasm and often end up accepting that they won’t be for weeks or months at a time. Once I hand over that control what happens if she’s pushing things farther? She’s assured me that we’ll start slow. A few days between orgasms. I wonder, does chastity remove all the spontaneity of PIV sex?

The benefits of chastity I’m quite eager to accept. The frequent masturbation presents some challenges for maintaining an erection for a day or two afterward. The temptation in the early mornings when I’d normally wake for work and am horny regardless, to just be able to simply get up and be productive rather than browse porn and waste time is appealing. Being more than ready for sex with the girlfriend, when she wants it. The lack of pressure to perform too..,

On a side note, the PA is a nifty addition. It’s fully healed, starting to stretch on it’s own. Urinating is a little messy but that was expected. I’m contemplating getting a 6g ring to put in. Right now the 8g ball trap ring remains in place, and I don’t have the tool necessary to open it up to release the ball, at least, I wouldn’t use my snap ring pluses as they’d likely score the ring.

The girlfriend likes the ring, how it looks, how it feels, putting a finger through it and taking control of that way.

Perhaps the cage will arrive in the next few weeks…

 

[Forsake]

The cage arrived some weeks ago but I’m as of yet unable to use it. The PA pin seems slightly larger than what was ordered. Calipers are at my house in the garage so I haven’t confirmed for sure. The documentation I received at the piercer’s is at her place, along with the chastity cage. I need to order a 6 gauge taper and ring to size up my PA some but first need to confirm some info on the documentation. There hasn’t been much discussion of chastity since it has arrived, the holiday season has been busy for us.

I’ve been working a lot and didn’t think of it much. Recently caught covid and will be out of work this week, probably next too. So I’m quarantining in a bedroom. Best I can tell, I haven’t infected anyone else with this garbage variant. Not sure how long I would have been infectious for but I woke up in the middle of the night feeling poor, took a covid test and it was positive. Girlfriend and I often sleep in separate bedrooms because I wake up significantly earlier than her due to my work schedule. I don’t know if the vaccine/boosters helped at all but I can attest that it’s been miserable even with them. Anyway…

The next step I think is just going ahead and stretching and letting the piercing be ready whenever the girlfriend brings up chastity. Maybe confirm with my calipers 6 gauge is correct but I have a feeling the size is closer to 4. My hope is that once a 6 gauge is established the pin will fit in with some gentle pressure and a little lube. That was my hope with the current size though and it didn’t work.

That aside, the cage is well made, very light. Titanium. There’s a slight asymmetry with the bars but it’s handmade and I like that aspect of it, to notice the asymmetry one would have to remove the cage to inspect it, wouldn’t be anything noticeable while worn. My girlfriend opted for a cage with more bars/less access, with a small brush I’m hoping hygiene will be easy. I tried it on without the PA pin and it fits well, is very comfortable. Best I can tell the pin won’t be a problem once the piercing is appropriately sized.

I’m also slightly apprehensive about walking down this road. My girlfriend has displayed a not insignificant amount of excitement about the prospect of my ability to masturbate and orgasms being under her control. Once they are, and fantasy turns into reality, what will that entail.?

 

[Forsake]

Well, the past month and a half has been quite bad.

My girlfriend and I aren’t in a great place in our relationship after an argument separated us and prolonged illness then work have kept us apart. Covid for me, probably RSV for her just as I was getting better, now I’ve got some cold, just coughing with a running nose, right as I have more days off too. Feel fine aside from those symptoms.

So, here I am, sick again, with time on my hands so I tried again to fit the PA pin into the piercing. It took some lube and a fair amour of pressure, but it finally slid through. It was uncomfortable but not painful.

I wasn’t expecting the pin to fit. I’ve been tugging/pushing some on the PA ring lately but didn’t figure it was helping to loosing up. Truth be told I was really just procrastinating ordering a larger gauge ring. Fortunately, I had the foresight to put the base ring on first too, so the rest of the cage got put together.

The sexual excitement was a bit much so I ended up trying to masturbate with the cage on, then unlocked it to complete the deed. Simply put, it’s not possible to cum with the cage on which I’m happy about. My willpower lately had been shit as far as that’s concerned and leading up to and shortly after the arrival of the cage my girlfriend had been saying things like once we begin chastity I won’t be getting to masturbate/would always be in chastity unless she wants it off. Was approaching remaining time until chastity as a sort of “last hurrah”. I can see in retrospect how that didn’t help the relationship with there being times we didn’t have sex because I had recently masturbated.

She’s brought it up some too, even after the fight. I know she equates the PA ring to being there for purely chastity, and was wanting to make sure I didn’t take it out. I don’t really know what my plan is now, now that it’s on, anyway.

Physically, it fits well. I’m not sure how long I plan to keep the PA pin in place before I check on its progress. Initially I thought I’d just wear it until it’s uncomfortable then remove the cage and toss the PA ring back on. However, the pin is hollow and urination is easier, the cage itself is light, titanium, and thus far feels fine. There really isn’t a reason to remove it yet as it’s comfortable. I figure unless it becomes a problem I’ll just keep the chastity on. I’m not sure how long it will take to “break in” too, maybe two weeks?

Mentally, I’m not ready to surrender control to my girlfriend. I’d like for us to resolve the argument we had, not just sweep it under the rug and move on as I feel like is her way of dealing with it. There’s also the aspect that I do want chastity to be a part of our relationship and if I were to hand over control then want it back it’d be damaging.

I’ll have to tell her sooner rather than later that I’ve managed to fit the pin in since I’ll be wearing it as the piercing stretches.

Anyway, expect another update soon.

 

[Forsake]

I suppose that’s it. My girlfriend has one key, the other I put in an altoid tin and punched two holes to security tag it closed. Took a video of the key going in and locked then sent it to her to keep myself accountable. It’s available to crack open in an emergency but essentially this cage isn’t coming off without her taking it off.

We went to go see a movie, Avatar, and returned to her place. Things were a bit awkward between us, not because of chastity, just unresolved differences. It was those prior arguments/time apart while we were sick.

She was grabbing at my cage some during the movie and during the ride home, giggling/excited, asked if I wanted to go have sex, which I did. She asked if I put the chastity on to keep from having sex, I said I was trying again to fit the pin into my PA and it went in, so I was just keeping it on because I didn’t want to keep having that issue due to the size of the PA.

She wanted me to strip down in the living room, I got down into underwear and tshirt. I tossed the key to her when the pants came off, then we headed to the bedroom.

Once we got to the bed that’s where a bit of the awkwardness came out. Again, not chastity related. We both weren’t really in a place to discuss things and it seemed like there wasn’t going to be any sex to be had for a moment there. She put the key in her pocket, I had asked something to the effect of if I should just come over where I can’t take the horniness anymore. She said no, she’ll let me know when she wants dick.

The notion that I’d have to wait longer was too much then, so I was very much eager to squash the awkwardness. I stripped down to the chastity, she undressed down to panties, let me take those off while saying no to unlocking me/teasing. She wasn’t going to let me go down on her, but was content to be touched/make out. I think she just wanted me to beg, and I did. Eventually she relented, unlocked the cage. We had good sex, both came, and while she was cleaning up told me to put the chastity back on.

I was a bit too lightheaded/thirsty right then, plus she was in the bathroom and I wanted to clean myself up some and show her how the chastity is put together. So I did those tasks then we returned to the bedroom and I showed her how everything fits together/the pinch points. The PA pin slid in fine.

Now I suppose I’m just going to be in chastity all the time moving forward. We haven’t talked about an unlock schedule or any of the practicalities. I think I’ll just go with the flow of things, it’s going to be a learning experience for us both after all. She said she knew what chastity was from a guy she briefly dated, but I don’t think that she was in a keyholder role.

I’ve certainly never been in this position. This chastity I’m unable to pull out of due to the PA piercing, the second key is now behind a numbered tag meaning it would be apparent if I accessed it/broke her trust. She told me the day before we got our piercings that if we’re going to get pierced then we’re doing chastity for real, and all the way.

She was obviously excited about the chastity. When I asked her what she was thinking about it, she just said she liked it because I do. There’s obviously more to that but I’m thinking I’ll just find out when she decides to act on any desires she has, and also a little excited for her to be in the driver’s seat for sexual activities too. I just feel like I jumped into the deep end with this.

Would have been nice to make sure I wasn’t going to have any problems long term, get the hygiene thing down, and maybe build up to being caged all the time. On top of that, I’m already horny again and now there’s nothing I can do for relief.