Maintenance Spanking

SheMastersMyDomain

SheMastersMyDomain

In continuous chastity since 1/1/19
Jan 7, 2019
200
310
73
Queen City, USA
My wife/KH and I have been exploring boundaries of our relationship and I have been exploring the boundaries of my sexuality and submissiveness. I have been desiring to further test my limits/feelings of being submissive to her. As part of this, I started asking her to implement maintenance spankings to help me feel more submissive. We only fairly recently started any spanking, and so far it’s mostly in the category of funishment. We now have multiple implements and she has done it several times. I am desiring she take it a little further and we have been discussing that. I asked her to take me to at least the point that makes me cry. I’m not sure she understands why and frankly I’m having a difficult time articulating why I want her to conduct this type of maintenance discipline.

Therefore, I would like to pose a few questions to the kind folks here that have used maintenance spanking.

For those coming from vanilla life, and particularly those subs that requested their KH do it, how did you explain the want/need for it? In the larger picture, how does one describe to their Wife of 20 years (KH for 2) that they want their loved one to do this to/for them?

Does it help you be or feel more submissive and how long does that last afterwards?

what other reasons do couples specifically use maintenance spanking for?

thanks so much in advance for considering this topic

PS: I chose to post in this forum because in my mind I am asking something much more related to FLM/ Ds, than in the pain/punishment forum.
 
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I can't imagine having 'maintenance spankings", I understand being punished for errors, mistakes, or poor behavior. I also see how spankings can be woven into sex play. But the idea of regular discipline for practice or reminders, or on a schedule wouldn't work for me. Good luck with it if it helps you.
 
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In Our case, it was Ma'am who said it was needed. We were never vanilla we met on the old IRC chat 17 years ago. The first rule for me was a maintenance spanking, She let me pick the day so Friday it becomes the day. It has never changed I can count on one hand the days missed or moved to a different day. Yes, it does put me into subspace/ also super submissive. It works in our life maybe because it been there from the start I also carry a notebook 24/7 for any Female to write infractions. good luck :)
 
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Mistress spanks me most nights a prelude to any type of play. We don't see each other every night in that setting maybe 3 times a week. This week has been pretty tough week we both had a tiresome week and mistress was very melancholy as such I didnt even get spanked.

I cant believe I am saying this but I miss it!! Even tho her maintenance spankings happen even if there is no play and they HURT...having a week with no attention at all, no spankings ...leaves me feeling equally Melancholy and strangely unloved.
 
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She once said she wanted to start maintenance discipline but the reality of life made it so irregular that it lost all meaning and died a quiet death. What she wanted was just some fun playtime every once in awhile (she gets turned on by it) and didn’t want to wait for me to do something bad or actually be upset while doing it(spoils her being turned on).
 
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In some ways, Saturday night have become punishment night. Not that it’s maintenance or preplanned, but the night where we have fun or game night. There are some when we are alone and she wants to flog me for not responding quick enough or not pleasing her in a certain way. Or just the luck of the draw and where the night has taken us.

Then there is contest night where 2 other like minded couples come over or we go there and a theme is selected for the evening. Like the men only wearing cuffs, collars, and their cages serving the ladies food and drink while the chat. Or fun night, when the ladies have fun with each other and we are forced to watch and then clean them up. Then the worst, game night where the winning couple just relaxes and the lady chooses the pleasure the male receives, while the 2 losers are punished with the various crops for losing and embarrassing his mistress. Been on the losing side a few times and not fun.
 
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Thomas Gangman said:
In some ways, Saturday night have become punishment night. Not that it’s maintenance or preplanned, but the night where we have fun or game night. There are some when we are alone and she wants to flog me for not responding quick enough or not pleasing her in a certain way. Or just the luck of the draw and where the night has taken us.

Then there is contest night where 2 other like minded couples come over or we go there and a theme is selected for the evening. Like the men only wearing cuffs, collars, and their cages serving the ladies food and drink while the chat. Or fun night, when the ladies have fun with each other and we are forced to watch and then clean them up. Then the worst, game night where the winning couple just relaxes and the lady chooses the pleasure the male receives, while the 2 losers are punished with the various crops for losing and embarrassing his mistress. Been on the losing side a few times and not fun.
Click to expand...


Now that's the kinda couples we have to meet!
 
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Every night in bed before we turn off the lights to go to sleep I must fetch the bamboo cane. @MrsBR_Saiph uses this deadly and silent tool to deliver a resounding reminder of my place. We have teenagers so I must be quiet.
I wait until she is ready, with knees tucked up under me, arse up in the air, face mashed into the pillow and then the only sound is the brutal swish of that nasty implement as it glides through the air to meet my bare skin. Oh yes, and that of me grunting with clenched teeth into the pillow.
She always whispers to me what a pussy I am and to stop whining.
The outwardly quietness of the act is unworldly erotic (considering the cacophony of noise and light exploding in my head with every blow upon my skin).
We rarely did spanking before and only as a punishment (although severe and never to be sought after). Now that I am a cuckold, she decided (on her own) that I need this to help condition me so I maintain a constant feeling of submission and acceptance of her position as a woman, as my keyholder and as my hotwife.
It is working wonders, as is the 24/7 chastity (regardless of how much fucking we do, because I am rarely allowed to cum).
If we miss a night or miss a week because of my shifts, they don't go away, rather the strokes are saved up and delivered when convenient, though it may be over several nights as she does have a kind and merciful side.
I have never cried but have come damn close, but I try not to because she doesn't want to see that. So I 'suck it up' as best I can, to be the best man I can be for her.
Then it's off to sleep with a cherry red burning ass. I sleep like a baby, because she puts me into such a submissive zen state doing this day in and day out.
Heavenly.
So IMHO maintenance spankings are an excellent tool for a woman to use to keep her man right where he is supposed to be.
 
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BR_Saiph said:
she decided (on her own) that I need this to help condition me so I maintain a constant feeling of submission and acceptance of her position as a woman, as my keyholder
Click to expand...

thanks for the very thoughtful reply @BR_Saiph. Although it wasn’t my KHs idea, I’m seeking the feelings you describe, which is why I asked the community.

Are there similar stories of the positive effects of maintenance spanking for the sub and how does one articulate to their KH the reasons they want it.
 
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An update: this was to be a couples play weekend this Saturday and now plans have changed because of one couple. The husband may have been exposed at his place of work and the employees have been sent home for isolation and notifying their doctor. Now following everything going on in the world, we will also start isolating ourselves for playing with others. Bad enough we need to go to stores for food and supplies and the wife has to see clients for work. The last part is more clients want to skype and use electronic document delivery, so she is happy to comply.

Now for the bad news, she had a surprise for me for this weekend and that will also be delayed. I will now be on the receiving end of her disappointment, so I will be in for some corporal punishment. More to come..
 
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I learnt not to ask for a maintenance spanking because I usually get what I ask for and then some. Mistress has told me it IS her favorite activity.

I guess that itself puts me in a submissive state. Mistress was puzzled why I also feel sleepy after a hard spanking. Its sort of like the aftermath of a orgasm. It also works for when I am feeling horny and needy, spanking sets that a bay somehow, like a relief. I just feel relaxed sleepy and submissive....and relieved. Not something I was expecting, and I still puzzle about the mechanism. I am glad it works though as it has resolved a LOT if issues Mistress and I had,

When you say you want to know how to articulate it, is it because she is reluctant to hurt you? Are you struggling with articulating why you would want it? (see above)

Its strange we really only dabbled with the "wooden spoon" for years, and its only been the last 6 months since I did do something really bad that mistress has taken to it seriously with a paddle. But it works for more reasons than punishment for that deed.
 
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cogman said:
When you say you want to know how to articulate it, is it because she is reluctant to hurt you? Are you struggling with articulating why you would want it? (see above)
Click to expand...

@cogman thanks for your reply. I am struggling to justify or articulate why I want it and she is struggling with why i want her to so seriously hurt me. I asked her to take it past funishment. But I feel like she is struggling to understand why. I have explained that I would like to explore how it makes me feel submissive, establishes her dominance, etc. but I’m not sure she really ‘gets’ it. If anyone can help me explain it better to her, that would be really helpful.
 
I've often thought this would be good for me, but as Mistress (my keyholder) and I no longer live relatively near each other, it just isn't possible. When we did live close, this did happen but not on necessarily regular intervals. She seemed to enjoy it, and I learned to love the pain. LOL
 
It's good that you would like a weekly sp
SheMastersMyDomain said:
@cogman thanks for your reply. I am struggling to justify or articulate why I want it and she is struggling with why i want her to so seriously hurt me. I asked her to take it past funishment. But I feel like she is struggling to understand why. I have explained that I would like to explore how it makes me feel submissive, establishes her dominance, etc. but I’m not sure she really ‘gets’ it. If anyone can help me explain it better to her, that would be really helpful.
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Just thinking now she knows you would want it. But it should be all about here not you. So don't try to top her from the bottom. Let her mature and do it her way. Maybe one day she would do it when you least expects it.
 
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Mistress never seriously hurts me, the picture in my gallery is about as bad as it gets.

Perhaps if you agree with some of the things said in this thread, you could copy them on to piece of paper and print it for her to read.

Often it seems that people feel more comfortable knowing that it is not an uncommon thing and there can be benefits for both her and you.

For us part of it is because our sex drives differ, this kind of play (amongst other things) helps fill in the void between mutual orgasms. These remain my favorite form of intimacy regardless of any tease and denial and mistress enjoys that mutuality too. Sometimes Mistress will decide to climax and deny me but not often. In an ideal world of course these things would happen more often and I would be denied. But reality is usually different to the ideal.

Apart from speed bumps of life, I really love the relationship we have.
 
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Goddess S. my wife farms out some of my maintenance spankings to Ms. L., a pro dom. I see Ms. L. about once a month, sometimes for just a maintenance spanking to keep me in a submissive mindset, and sometimes if I have been good, I get a longer session with a treat too. I find Ms. L. hits a lot harder than Goddess S., which makes the spanking pretty effective at shaping my behavior. I really appreciate Goddess S.'s and Ms. L's efforts. I feel spoiled by all of the attendiion and a great deal of grattitute to both of them.
 
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