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Rough morning/night

Discussion in 'The Tower' started by Noorgasm4me, Jan 11, 2017.

  1. i have been awake since 3am. Absolutely beside myself with that horny need to touch. It is also a bitter sweet day, tonight I will not be alone in bed which means I either have to come clean about my cage or remove it. I don't want to remove it, I am absolutely loving this experience so far and really want it to continue. This has been a very intense time for me and I really would like to push it further, to push myself further. I am not ready for it to end, yet I also do not want to be discovered wearing this. I really want to bring it up in conversation openly, not just be discovered.
  2. How you introduce the idea of chastity is crucial to its success. Just remember that this is your fantasy, your kink. The person you are going to be with will likely never have even heard and will also no doubt not understand. They will not know how much fun they can have with it. My thoughts are that your instinct not to be 'caught' wearing the device is correct, my advice is to introduce the idea away from any sexual activity.

    Good luck.
  3. A few years ago, I accidentally left a window open on our computer and she saw it when I was out. It was a chastity site, she was not happy. She was very upset with me, considered it cheating
  4. Oh, that's not good.

    I must admit I am confused with some women's reaction to chastity. How on earth is being interested in chastity cheating? I would have thought the opposite was true. I wish there was a way of getting the women who love this game to somehow help the women who get disturbed by it, show them how good it is for them, let them know we aren't freaks and weirdos.
    spider203 likes this.
  5. After that experience, I have been gun shy to bring it up
  6. I just gave some advice on another thread about the way to introduce chastity. I assume that your relationship is sexual, given that you know you are going to be discovered wearing the device if you keep it on. I would try to introduce it as a way of having fun with tease and denial or you could even introduce her to the Taoist ideas of semen retention.

    I have a favourite blog that, while it is supposedly about setting up an FLR is actually more about using Taoist semen retention practices to improve the sexual aspect of a relationship. If my Wife ever gets bored of chastity I am definitely going to get her to look at this. The latest article is even about how to introduce the idea to your partner.

  7. Our relationship is no longer sexual, hasn't been for years. Just don't want an accidental brush against to find out
    Jasmic68 likes this.
  8. If it isn't sexual then I would suggest that you do not need to worry. Also, if it isn't sexual, how can you cheat?
    NsToy likes this.
  9. I worry because I don't want to hurt her feelings. I do not understand the cheat thing myself. Just trying and wishing it could go back to any kind of sexual. It is how I found out about chastity. I googled how to make my wife excited about sex again. Somewhere in there was chastity. Now the rest is history. Lol
  10. Do you mind if I ask a few questions, based on the posts you have made? Don't feel you have to answer them, you don't know me.

    In your initial post you mentioned that you are not going to be alone in bed tonight which made me think that normally you are. In your last post you mention your wife. Is it your wife you are going to be in bed with tonight? Also what age group are you? You mentioned you was looking for ways to make your wife excited about sex again. This makes me think that you are in a later stage of life than might otherwise be probable. It isn't always the case, many younger people are asexual. Was your wife interested in sex before?

    I honestly think that long before you try chastity you need to sort out the issue of your wife's lack of interest in sex. I have read posts by many men who face similar issues and I often wonder why it happens. Have you talked with her about your need for sexual relationship?

    My advice would be to try and start things off lightly. Sort out intimacy first. Cuddles, massages, spending time doing non-sexual things. Then try upping the sensual nature of the experiences. Orgasm is not the goal. This is how chastity has helped me and my Wife. The amount of time we spend being intimate but not sexual has totally reinvigorated our sex life. It has certainly had an amazing effect on my Wife.
  12. I can see a woman saying she considered finding that on your computer cheating...not in the traditional sense, but lying. Same goes with her just finding it on you.

    I know a lot of people get into chastity as a form of control, but not men giving them control, men taking from them:
    1. We never have sex anyway
    2. I'm tired of rejection
    3. Just give her the keys and she will tell me when she is ready.
    4. Will start by setting rules, like at least once a month release for sex, time limits etc.
    5. This guarantees you will have sex more than you do, never get rejected, and forces her to feel obligated to have sex by a certain date.

    Chastity can feel forced on to someone, and lets face it, in general she already has control. The only thing you are bringing her is being responsible for your pleasure...she already has control over hers.

    So as @Jasmic68@Jasmic68 said, her just discovering it on you, I think would end negatively.

    Talk with her. She's your partner. She deserves to know who she's sleeping next to. Talk about masterbation, how often. Talk about her masterbation. Talk about how much you are turned on by give her control. Don't mention side effects like being attentive,treating her better, or cleaning more...she will say she shouldn't have to lock your dick up for you to do that.

    I wish ya the best, best part of chastity is how communication becomes easier, I suggest you try that.