Sharing with friends!! Wtf

S

Shaun

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Feb 14, 2018
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Hi My fellow chaste and future chastised….

we are in Jersey visiting friends and Sarah had a girls night out Monday. We never had a chance to speak when she got home as I was already asleep.

On Tuesday we had a date night with friends and Sarah looked so hot! We were talking in the car heading to dinner and I was asking about her evening…. She came right out and told me that she discussed being my key holder and how I asked to use a chastity device! She even showed her friend the key she’s carrying.

while it turns me on… it’s really embarrassing and this entire process only started a week ago. I’m not currently locked, but Sarah has made a point of telling me how she’s excited to use the cobra when we arrive home.

is it normal for a key holder to want to share this with friends? I’m thinking about asking Sarah to write her thoughts in a journal on CM. I’m also thinking about journaling my progress when I start the cobra.
 
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Normal is subjective. I don't see mine ever openly sharing she has the keys to my dick lol. Closest thing so far was friends noticing how much more attentive I am, asking me if she had my balls in purse. She smiled said no just the keys to them. As far as journals no doubt they can be helpful. Just be prepared for them to be psycho analyzed to death. Only thing I'd consider having her here is losing your safe space as much as I hate that word. To vent and say what you want without fear of her seeing it. It maybe early in your journey to open her up to all this on here. Just personal observations do what you feel is best of course.
 
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My wife shared our lifestyle with her closest GF. Girls night out, lots of wine and information flowed. It started for when the GF was complaining about her husband. No attention, feeling taken for granted, sex on demand etc.
The GF mentioned how "wonderful" I treat my wife. It was hard to go to dinner with them with her knowing I wear a chastity belt, panties, and disciplined when I break her rules.

Several months later, my wife was talking with her on the phone and she stopped to ask me where we bought my cage and how much was it.
While I'm told anything like that, I'm guessing the GF's hubby is now in a cage. LOL
 
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That's really embarrassing. Kind of hot too, and nice that she is proud, but I do wonder if her friends will see you in the same light after.
 
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Shaun said:
Hi My fellow chaste and future chastised….

we are in Jersey visiting friends and Sarah had a girls night out Monday. We never had a chance to speak when she got home as I was already asleep.

On Tuesday we had a date night with friends and Sarah looked so hot! We were talking in the car heading to dinner and I was asking about her evening…. She came right out and told me that she discussed being my key holder and how I asked to use a chastity device! She even showed her friend the key she’s carrying.

while it turns me on… it’s really embarrassing and this entire process only started a week ago. I’m not currently locked, but Sarah has made a point of telling me how she’s excited to use the cobra when we arrive home.

is it normal for a key holder to want to share this with friends? I’m thinking about asking Sarah to write her thoughts in a journal on CM. I’m also thinking about journaling my progress when I start the cobra.
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In my opinion, it’s a show of dominance and a practice of humiliation for her own amusement. It will feel embarrassing at first, but once you’ve accepted your situation as the new normal then it’ll be like any other conversation you have with friends you trust.

Learn to embrace it and your chastity journey will be that much more fun & exciting.
 
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JamesD said:
That's really embarrassing. Kind of hot too, and nice that she is proud, but I do wonder if her friends will see you in the same light after.
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Yes!! That’s my concern. Also, whether they will keep our secret… oh well. I will remain optimistic… I do trust her friend. We’ve known each other for many years
 
My KH did not share anything about chastity with anyone, but honestly I will be very much OK if she does, I encourage her to do it. Actually, I already did share it with a friend and his GF. I am not embarrassed of the cage, if anything - I am proud of it. Not too many men (outside of CM, obviously) can go that long without wanking.
And if someone starts to see me differently after knowing about the cage, then that person did not see me well before anyway.
 
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Did you discuss the idea of going public beforehand? If not, there is a question of trust here. It depends how you feel about it. This would be a relationship ender for me because trust would have been destroyed but that's just me and everyone/every relationship is different. Hope it works out for you both.
 
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LesterBallard said:
Did you discuss the idea of going public beforehand? If not, there is a question of trust here. It depends how you feel about it. This would be a relationship ender for me because trust would have been destroyed but that's just me and everyone/every relationship is different. Hope it works out for you both.
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It's not like she's going around broadcasting to the public... I know people who would do that and I agree that ain't funny or right, but she told only a friend she knows. That's different. I myself already told a few people I know I can trust that I'm in chastity and I told them I wouldn't mind if they told someone they know and trust the same. Because what can they do about it? Simple answer: Nothing! :cool:
 
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Good for you having a KH out you to her girlfriends. The next thing you will be sent over to do housework, while locked and in a French maid's outfit. Time to have a girl's night in where lots of drinks can flow, you can serve all night and then no doubt have to show your caged cock to her friends when requested.
 
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Curious40ish said:
Good for you having a KH out you to her girlfriends. The next thing you will be sent over to do housework, while locked and in a French maid's outfit. Time to have a girl's night in where lots of drinks can flow, you can serve all night and then no doubt have to show your caged cock to her friends when requested.
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That's actually a good idea. In fact, I'll do you one better... Suggest a party for your KH and her female friends and wear only a gentleman's bowtie (waiter style) and of course be locked up awhile, and have a serving tray and "service" them (ALL of them) while role playing the submissive waiter. ;) :+1: :cool:
 
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PornAddict103 said:
It's not like she's going around broadcasting to the public... I know people who would do that and I agree that ain't funny or right, but she told only a friend she knows. That's different. I myself already told a few people I know I can trust that I'm in chastity and I told them I wouldn't mind if they told someone they know and trust the same. Because what can they do about it? Simple answer: Nothing! :cool:
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This really reflects how I feel given some time to digest. It’s new and exciting and she wanted to share. She’s seen a few friends this week, and she only has a bond close enough to share with the friend I’ll call Tuesday.
 
Curious40ish said:
Good for you having a KH out you to her girlfriends. The next thing you will be sent over to do housework, while locked and in a French maid's outfit. Time to have a girl's night in where lots of drinks can flow, you can serve all night and then no doubt have to show your caged cock to her friends when requested.
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That’s kind of a turn on….. but… I don’t see it happening
 
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I believe that women have a much different relationship with their close girlfriends than we males understand. They are compelled to share many otherwise private details with their friends. While I don't know, for sure, who Mistress has confided our little "secret" to, From the knowing glances, smirks and smiles that I've received, I bet many more people know of my chastity than I think.
 
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I suppose it's also important who the friends are. If they are women who are kink-friendly and they share intimate sexual details with, then it is acceptable but still highly embarrassing. If shared with vanilla family members or workmates, then that's probably a step to far IMHO.
 
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In our case it was taken as a joke I believe. If she had outright said I keep his junk locked I'd have not been happy at all. Our dynamic is between us. I doubt she'd be happy if I told her holy roller sister she kept me caged and beat my ass black and blue while smiling. Let's not venture off into fantasy land here that he should be a man servant or the like.
 
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JamesD said:
I suppose it's also important who the friends are. If they are women who are kink-friendly and they share intimate sexual details with, then it is acceptable but still highly embarrassing. If shared with vanilla family members or workmates, then that's probably a step to far IMHO.
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No. This is definitely a kink friendly lady, and they apparently have lots of sexual discussions. That’s why this is different from her other friends.
 
Shaun said:
That’s kind of a turn on….. but… I don’t see it happening
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I still think perhaps getting these girlfriends over for some cool refreshing beverages is the go.
Be on your best behavior, make sure you make your KH feel like an absolute princess, Get her and her friends lots of drinks. Then wait for the magic to happen.
No need to try to out yourself, if she has already told them, it will only be a matter of time until the Dutch courage rises, and the dare will be requested or demanded from your KH.
If nothing happens, it doesn't matter your still get to submit to your KH in front of her friends.
Good luck.
 
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Before I posted this, I went to look up the word abuse…google brings up the oxford dictionary and wikipedia definitions and seem to be pretty accurate for the term.

The question posed by the original poster reminds me of one of Gibbs rules from NCIS and the problem(s) that comes with it:
“Rule #4: Best way to keep a secret: Keep it to yourself. Second best: Tell one other person—if you must. There is no third best.”

If you tell one other person and that person tells one other person and that person tells one other person…and on and on. It doesn’t seem clear to me that most people are likely to be able to keep it to themselves so they will find that one other person. The secret grows exponentially and you have zero control over it after it leaves the lips of the other person to their person. In a perfect world no one would tell anyone else’s secrets but we don’t live in that.

The main issue with the keyholder telling someone (or the chaste telling someone) is that it really is a small world and some secrets aren’t meant for the consumption of all. Having a secret turn into Losing something like your job or having your reputation take a serious and in some states a legal hit could be life changing in the worst way possible all because of a fetish (wherther it turned into a lifestyle or not). This whole thing to me does seem to scream consent issues and possibly even an abuse of trust and no I don’t think getting “ok with it” after the fact would justify it happening at all.

If you have a clear understanding of your relationship and that’s your thing, you do you, go be the happily humiliated chaste you want to be; but if it’s something you’ve never spoken about before and this kind of information is just dropped on you, that’s really not ok, even as a “show of dominance,” dominance and humiliation without consent is in fact abuse so I could totally understand this being a relationship ender. Abuse of trust is not a joke.
 
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collaredhubby said:
Before I posted this, I went to look up the word abuse…google brings up the oxford dictionary and wikipedia definitions and seem to be pretty accurate for the term.

The question posed by the original poster reminds me of one of Gibbs rules from NCIS and the problem(s) that comes with it:
“Rule #4: Best way to keep a secret: Keep it to yourself. Second best: Tell one other person—if you must. There is no third best.”

If you tell one other person and that person tells one other person and that person tells one other person…and on and on. It doesn’t seem clear to me that most people are likely to be able to keep it to themselves so they will find that one other person. The secret grows exponentially and you have zero control over it after it leaves the lips of the other person to their person. In a perfect world no one would tell anyone else’s secrets but we don’t live in that.

The main issue with the keyholder telling someone (or the chaste telling someone) is that it really is a small world and some secrets aren’t meant for the consumption of all. Having a secret turn into Losing something like your job or having your reputation take a serious and in some states a legal hit could be life changing in the worst way possible all because of a fetish (wherther it turned into a lifestyle or not). This whole thing to me does seem to scream consent issues and possibly even an abuse of trust and no I don’t think getting “ok with it” after the fact would justify it happening at all.

If you have a clear understanding of your relationship and that’s your thing, you do you, go be the happily humiliated chaste you want to be; but if it’s something you’ve never spoken about before and this kind of information is just dropped on you, that’s really not ok, even as a “show of dominance,” dominance and humiliation without consent is in fact abuse so I could totally understand this being a relationship ender. Abuse of trust is not a joke.
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I think you're blowing this whole thing out of proportion, pal.
 
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