Well, be careful what you ask for. I confronted my KH and asked her if she truly wanted to be my mistress, because that is different from a KH, and she had been mailing it in. She said not tonight, after drinking, I'll think about it. Fully expected her to pretend the conversation never happened, as she hates confrontation. But to my surprise, she brought it up, and we had a rare open and frank discussion. Bottom line, yes, the chastity is permanentl, no if ands or buts. Yes , she does want to be my mistress too. And finally, yes, she will become more engaged, and brook no violations of her protocols. This is where she had slacked prompting my coming to her. She did not notice or ay anything when I failed to do things she had said I needed to do as her sissy.
As a show of good faith, I had sent her someone's post last week where his mistress had administered a brutal whipping of him using a Scottish holed paddle, I forget the name , She had said that looked more intense than anything I would accept. That was ~ a week ago. Now She told me to buy one of those paddles, and as soon as it came, she would administer a punishment session identical to that that would show me she was dead serious as a mistress. It was an ascending in intensity beating with the paddle, with 5 minutes off each escalation . 5 strokes, hard and fast, then 10, then 15, then 20, then 25, then 30. Tied down hard, gagged tightly, and told not to whimper or cry out. I just ordered today a 22 inch long half inch thick Honey Crow leather holed paddle from Adam and Gillian. The blind holes, that go only half way through, with a small hole that penetrates all the way. Supposed to create a suction. We already have 2 of their wonderful custom made whips, Loopy Phil , and the Corkscrew cats. Two to 8 weeks before I have to face the reality of what I have literally asked for,
As those captions so accurately say "so how does it feel now that your fantasy of permanent chastity is now a reality.? Not so exciting anymore, is it?'
She also instituted a daily pledge to her on my knees. She even sat down and wrote out the 3 lines then and there, much to my surprise.
That said , I don't regret anything. If I am going to be in permanent chastity, then I want it to be the full monty. I love playing with chastity, but I am not a fan of permanent chastity. If given a choice of permanent chastity over full freedom, I would chose the latter. Tough. She wants permanent chastity. She wants the full monty when it comes to chastity. I absolutely adore my wife of 50 years, and want her to be happy more than anything in the world.. I am completely prepared to accept permanent chastity, and now being a forever sissy to my mistress. CFMN and collared. I'm happy, and so is she. But not looking forward to that Holey Cow ass whipping.
I'll let you know when it happens.