Does Chastity or Orgasm Denial.....

Actually, no. really. Not that I don't get sad from time to time, but it's not chasity or denial. You?

 

I have been at this for over a decade. Sometimes I do feel sad. However it is usually when we do not have sex on a regular basis. This is something I explained to my wife and she now plans little things for me like bathing her, messaging her, making out for a few minutes and like tomorrow, oral sex on her.

Every day there is something sexual and that prevents the sadness. I learned that being locked and ignored was bad. Made me ask myself why am I giving up my orgasms with not much in return. We fixed that problem. I find that I actually share my wife’s orgasms. Calms me down and gets rid of my horniness.

 

Yeah it gets tough work and life is stressful. Getting off is the release valve. It's all a matter of accepting its what you asked for. My 19 days be up tomorrow best believe I'm abusing myself like I me owe me money.

 

oh no keeps me excited

 

I think I probably do get a bit sad from time to time but my gf would quite shocked if she thought she was causing this. We are both agreeing to this on a daily basis and she knows my desire is to have a strict domme even if that doesn't feel great in the moment. This morning I had the strongest, longest morning erection I've had in years. These last 4 months have been extremely strict with one orgasm for me. I believe I'm experiencing a YBOP reboot so quite happy to endure the rough patches for this. We've been doing this for so long we can't really imagine going back to vanilla. We'd find us going back to "playing at" chastity and bdsm which is not putting the female authentically in charge of the relationship. So no matter how if look at it I belong in strict chastity.

 

Yeah.

Go get some strenuous excercise.

 

Our journey is much less shorter, but the daily, "No I haven't forgotten that you wilingly surrender yourself to me" little things have made a profound difference.Mrs. KyDave does those same things (and others).

I, too, share in her plesure: it satisfies me deeply. I often tell her after a few minutes of attention (either giveing or receiving) that that will hold me for another couple of days. I'm not yet at the point where it gets rid of my horniness, but after a brief period to recompose myself there is a thorough calmness and tranquility.

 

Every person is going to have a different and unique response to this, so thank you OP for the question.

I am different than many. I kind of bumped into chastity when web searching to find a coping mechanism for my issue of no intimacy because of my wife's health issues. I thought mindless flapping was a dead end street.

The result of many years in this situation without having resolution was the core problem that was making me sad. Finding and employing a chastity cage it what helped tone down the deep sadness that was chronic for me.

So I have been doing this for more than 6 years now. The problem then became consistency. Self locking is for stronger people than me. Knowing that I can unlock anytime and doing it, ended up creating a sadness all of its own.

Up until recently, I spent nearly 2 years in my cage with two 15 minute unlocks but no releases. Those were the best days because time has told the story of the drop. I had always had a problem with drop before chastity, but locking up really exposed my drop issues.

When that arrangement discontinued, I slipped a lot. So my last O was so severe that it has messed me up for days. Now a kind mistress has taken ownership for permanent chastity. Hope I will never be sad now.

 

In the past, yes to both.

But then I also would feel down after orgasm.

Going for a long time without orgasm or ejaculation changed things for the better.

 

We’ve been living this way long enough that any time I get those thoughts of “why the hell did I ask for this?”, I try to focus on remembering how blah and depressed I’d get when I would be granted a week of freedom and cumming a bunch. And while I do miss having Piv basically daily, it’s become such an amazing experience when she finally allows it, that it makes it all worth it. Not to mention just being granted an erection has become a wonderful reward, or a ball rub while we cuddle after making her cum. All those little things I used to take for granted are now treats and make this way of life so much fun. Those all outweigh the couple times of sadness I may feel a month when I just wanna have a good fuck session with my Queen and know it’s not going to happen

 

The "being ignored" part can make me sad. Particularly in the 3-5 days window after an orgasm. Before that, I'm fine. After that, I'm in sub-space.

 

Sad? No. I find myself frustrated at times and always remind myself that chastity is both a physical and mental challenge. The longer I am locked I find the mental side getting easier. I accepted the physical challenge (no masturbating, limited orgasms, feel of wearing the cage etc) a long time ago

 

Personally, no. Not from Chastity. For me it is hard to explain. Like many I have no clue why I love being locked up. However, in my case it gives me a sense of comfort being locked up. If your sad though -that is not a good thing. I hope you get past this and enjoy the ride. I know that is easy to say. But I do hope you get past it.

 

I've heard a lot of numbers suggested as magical breakthrough numbers but none of them really worked for me. I had depressive symptoms at various stages through long continuous locks of up to 4 months, and then after that right up to 13months without ejaculating.

My view is that longer is better because I got used to the feelings and could better manage the insane horniness, plus, a long time without the huge hits of dopamine associated with orgasm means that the mind no longer has to experience the deep dives either because taking off the ridiculous highs also made the lows shallower.

 

Not at all... In fact, when I realized upon locking myself up for the first time, that not being able to get release when I really needed it felt so good, I picked up a major fetish for T&D. I keep myself locked up and I watch porn on a regular basis (hence my username) and I just love really wanting to jerk off for relief and not being able to. It gives me an even bigger high than drinking or inhaling something that'll give me a bad day the next morning. So, it gives me kinky reason to stay clean & sober.