From Day One

[Ashe]

Day 1 - 2/27/18

Hello everyone!

My name is Ashe, I am a 26yo male weighing in at around 250lbs with thick brown hair and deep brown eyes, my penis reaches a meager 4.7" on a good day, and on Friday February 23, 2018 my wife of three years agreed to lock me up. We placed an order for a cage at House of Denial, and Today is my last official day of freedom. My cage (Steel HoD s90s) is currently marked as in transit according to FedEx, and should be arriving in the next hour or so.

When I first mentioned the idea of full time chastity to my wife she laughed at me a little, but she could see the sincerity in my face and quickly recoiled. The truth is I was in a dark place and it was hurting my relationship. I would get home after work and disappear in the bathroom for an hour at a time every day, to masturbate; watching everything from vanilla sex between two connecting adults of the opposite sex, all the way to hard core gay BDSM and sissification hypnosis. Nothing was off limits and my cock loved it. However, whenever it came time to perform for my wife I couldn't. I would find reasons to put her off, and if I did get in bed with her I would fake an orgasm every time.

I needed to kill the cycle, and put some life back into our relationship. I hope that chastity can help us do that. By ordering this cage she has shown me that she is willing to stretch her comfort zone, and try new things. As for me, I have already noticed myself trying being more empathetic to her, and I hope putting her in a position of power will teach me to respect her. I know that chastity is not a magic solution to our problem, but I hope it will be a very powerful tool; helping reel me in while also bringing her into a world of sexual exploration she has hidden from due to her conservative upbringing.

Last night we discussed the terms for my new life and some of the expectations we both hold. I told her that before I hand her the keys to her cock I had three conditions that absolutely had to be met. First, there MUST be a safe word (Pacific Rim). If I ever say this she understands we must stop because something is truly wrong. Second, I needed to be let out once a week (under her supervision) to clean myself, and the cage thoroughly. Third, she must understand that this is no longer my cock but her toy, and she must treat it as such. I don't want her to release me because she is worried about disappointing me, I don't want her to think just because she let me out that she has to let me orgasm, I only want her to release me because she wants to play with her toy and if she feels generous she MIGHT let me finish. In short I want her to work her way up to being a full on Dom.

She was happy to accept all of these conditions and only made a few requests of her own. First, when we are not engaged in sexual play I am to act and remain true to myself although a little more empathy and care is welcomed. I am still the man of the house and father of our son. Second, no anal. I have approached her about pegging before, and she refuses to do anything with my ass other than spank it, anal just doesn't appeal to her. Third, If I argue with her over something trivial or mistreat her, there will be punishment and the punishment doesn't have to be consistent. For example if she wants Panera but I want Taco Bell and I try to fight her instead of accepting her decision, she might spank me with a paddle, or she might extend my time in the cage for an arbitrary duration. Fourth, she is no longer honey, baby, or (Wife's Name) in the bedroom, she is to be addressed as Madam with a capital "M". Finally, this can't be a temporary change that amounts to me wanting to play out a kink. She expects a real change to come from this and an honest effort put in to me changing my ways.

So as of 4:30 CST I will be off work and heading home to meet Madam at which point she will lock me away until she feels like letting me out. I have no idea when I will get to cum again, and frankly I don't care. I want to bring my relationship back to center, and I hope putting her at the center of my sexuality will help break the hypnotic grasp of porn. At the same time I like kinky and want our sex life to descend into a much more adventurous phase.

I am starting this journal to catalog my adventure into the lifestyle of a willfully chaste submissive male. I will only represent myself truthfully and will not exaggerate for the sake of fantasy. Hopefully this can become a daily thing but I plan to go no longer than a week without some sort of entry even if it is a slow uneventful week. I also want to open a gateway for myself to the community, offering a place where people can follow along, chat, and encourage each other to go deeper.

See You Space Cowboy...
-Ashe

 

[Ashe]

Day 1 Update - 2/27/18

Well FedEx apparently doesn't want to deliver my package, and its now showing a failed delivery attempt. After speaking with a customer service representative I was able to get the shipping facility information and should be able to pick up my cage at 5:00 PM.

Ill just take this as a sign that I need to prove my commitment to this life style. After all frustration is central to chastity...

 

[guest 2942]

sounds like you two have a great plan moving forward. Being serious and honest with each other goes a long way to improving things. Good luck and keep us updated.

 

[skD]

Very committed of you to make a proactive effort to rid yourself of the damaging addiction of porn. Been there so feel your pain.

Keep us posted and I am sure you two will love your new dynamic. It was a game changer for us.

HausCuck

 

[Nicoftime]

I know you are excited to start, and it sounds like she is a natural, just be warned that these devices are not easy to find the right fit, and extended wear may take some getting used to.

Just saying so you are not disappointed that you may have to order another device, take this one off at night, or go through a learning curve until the device and you are one. It is a rare thing to measure, order, put it on and be able to wear for long lengths right away.

Good luck and I sure hope it fits as good as it should.

 

[Ashe]

Wow, thanks for all the encouraging words everyone. It really means a lot to me that you would take the time to read and reply!

Day 2 - 2/28

After work yesterday I dropped by the FedEx shipping facility and picked-up my cage, but not without the lady at the front desk embarrassing me first. She asked for my tracking number, and then asked if I knew what the package was shipped in or how big it was. I told her it was about 2"x2" but I had no idea what it would have shipped in. She asked me what was in the package and I told her I would rather not disclose that, however she insisted as it would help her locate the package easier. I said it was something for me and my wife hoping she would stop pressing me, but again she pushed. "Is it jewelry or something", at this point the lady behind me was giggling, and I just said "sure let's go with that..." It finally clicked with the clerk I was looking to pickup something intimate. She found it in just a few minutes, and I was on my way. Turns out House of Denial shipped it in a padded envelope.

After the short drive home I headed to the bedroom where Madam was waiting for me. I showed her the device and she was eager to lock in my cock, but first she wanted me to shower. A few minutes later and we were ready to try it on.

I really hadn't expected it to be so difficult to get my balls into the ring. The left one kept running away, hiding up in my body and refusing to cooperate. After a. Good 20min of is chasing them down though they we're finally in. Once everything was in the ring we just had to get the cage on and everything was good. Except... Madam broke the key off in the lock... And we had a church group we were attending in about an hour... AND our son still needed a bath. So, I was not just locked I was trapped.

Fortunately this thing fits like a dream. I am so comfortable in it which is a relief since I know most people don't find a great fit to begin with. I have noticed some slight discoloration in my balls but not much, and they aren't cold or in ANY pain so I think they just need time to stretch. That said I could not keep my mind off of it. The steel is heavy and keeps everything so tightly in place it just made me so horny.

When we got home I was able to get the lock out of my cage and fish the broken key out of the lock. Then Madam locked me back up this time without breaking the key. I have been in chastity for about 11 hours as if posting, and I was able to sleep very well right up untill I had to pee, but that is normal for me. What isn't normal is getting on a chastity site at 4am to post about how amazing it feels being locked up, and how I can't wait to see where this takes me.

PS. Madam started her period today so this cage isn't coming off for at least a week!

 

[guest 2942]

Sounds like an exciting first day . those keys can be really chintzy. But you can also buy replacements.

 

[boisub]

Congratulations on getting off to a good start!

 

[JiL]

Congratulations on your new device and your new beginning. Hope you are able to do a whole week the first time around. When my Bride was still having a period, it was my favorite time to be locked up. This way I knew I would be all the more ready for her when the time was right. But, we can no longer gauge lock up time by her periods because those have stopped. This makes things even more interesting for me now. As far as watching porn, etc..., that desire for me has greatly diminished since starting chastity and a FLR. I believe that is largely due to the fact that whatever fantasies I still harbor are all centered around Her, or at least involve her in some way. Think of chastity and a FLR as a new way of living with your spouse which leaves you in a permanent state of courtship, like when you first met. Things are going to get better and you will be happier. It sounds like she truly cares about you as she is not afraid to embrace changes both in and out of the bedroom. However, try to let her set the tempo of those changes. Politely suggest in open conversation what you desire, but do not pressure her in any way. Wish you both the best in your new journey.

 

[Ashe]

@ineverknew I hope so. We're down to one key and if it breaks I have no idea what to do. Haha.

@boisub thanks I can't believe how much I am honestly enjoying the feeling. I don't think I can live without this cage anymore, and I certainly don't want to.

@JiL I really want her to go even longer without taking the cage off. I have been reading about this for a while and I want to get to the point where I am constantly leaking, it sounds so awful in a way I think I will love. But like you said I won't push her. She is my Dom and whatever she wants to do is what I will do.

Day 2 Update - 2/28/18

I am at work right now and just had to pee for my first time in public. It was such a rush knowing that anyone could peek into the stall and see my stainless cage shimmering back at them. I am in a constant state of heightened arousal but the cage is keeping me from enjoying it in a way I normally would. I think I prefer this though. I am helpless and it just makes it that much dirtier. I also noticed that I have stopped fantasizing about other women/men entirely and all my sexual thoughts are focused on this new dom/sub relationship. Only about 19 hours in and already my brain is rewiring!

 

[Ashe]

Day 2 Update - 2/28/18

After getting home from work today, I suggest that later that night we should take the device off and double check there is no bruising or chafing. Madam agreed and after putting our son to bed we stepped into the bathroom where she freed me. My cock jumped to imediate attention, and a quick inspection showed everything to be normal and undamaged. The plan was to spend a. Hour or so out of the cage to shave, clean, and put lotion on the areas my cage touches and then quickly put it back on.

This did not go as planned however. When it was time to put the cage back the connection between the tube and the ring kept pinching against my cock. We fought with the device for about an hour and a half before we finally got it back in place and locked down. Madam almost gave up on the entire idea of locking me up it was so frustrating.

When this cage is on it feels awesome, but I may need to look for something else if this keeps up. As it stands all of our time is going into just putting the cage back on.

On the bright side we ordered some new toys and they should be here on Friday. The first is a cock extension so that when Madam wants pleasure she can have it and use my cock without giving me any satisfaction in return. The other is a Hitachi Magic Wand which we are both going to be enjoying.

Sorry if this post seems a bit scattered or full of nonsense, I'm exhausted and about to pass out for the night. I just wanted to chronicle this ordeal.

 

[boisub]

Putting it on will get easier with practice! And tumescence will be less of a problem once your cock gets acclimated to the captive life.

 

[Jaxon1023]

If you are using the cage in your profile pic which is the same cage I was using but the longer version. Take a nylon sock or pantyhose and put it through the end between the bars and out the end of the tube. Put the base ring on and then your cock into the nylon pantyhose. Pull it back through the tube with your cock in it and the tube will slide up your cock into the basering. Once you get it locked just continue pulling the pantyhose completely out of the tube. It will slide right off your cock. If you’re not understanding what I am saying look up pantyhose method for chastity.

 

[guest 2942]

What @Jaxon1023 says is a great idea. This will certainly help.

 

[Kylara]

I confirm that the magic wand is a needed stuff, if you are single it gives a lot a sensation through the cage.

For lady, especially the ones who are more clitoral than vaginal it is excellent. And it last for hours. Not like us.

 

[Ashe]

@Jaxon1023 Thanks for the tip. I am using the one in my picture, and we will have to try this next time the cage comes off. I have a feeling after last night that Madam won't be taking it off for a long time though. Especially after the Hitachi comes in, what use will she even have for my pathetic cock that wasted so much of her time last night.

Day 3 - 3/1/18

I am sitting at work right now, and I can tell my cock and balls are noticeably swollen after last night. The ring hurts a bit but it isn't anything unbearable. I have also noticed a slight burning right where the cock ring is resting. I tried to lube it up this morning with some Wet Platinum, but it only helped a minor amount. The pain seems to ebb and flow with my attempted erections so I am not too worried about it, but I do hope that over the next few days/weeks I will build up a tolerance/resistance to it.

Madam was not in a good mood this morning either. Her period paired with the waste of time that was removing my cage last night has left her quite frustrated with me. Hopefully she will redirect this frustration into punishment later, but she may just become passive aggressive and want me to leave her alone. Madam has never been easy to read.

Other than that today is just about trying to acclimate to the cage and pushing through these initial growing pains. Thanks everyone who has been taking time to read my journal. Your tips and encouragement mean the world to me!

 

[Kylara]

Period time are also rude period time for men, we are with you.
The things I do in that case is a massage of her belly with coco oil. She feels a lot better after (end in a better mood).
It is also an opportunity to touch her skin (but not her genitals or breast).
We are with you.

 

[Ashe]

Day 4 - 3/2/18

Last night Madam and I spent a little time for our selves, Thursday's is Dungeons and Dragons night with my friends, so she left us alone to play while she spent some alone time catching up on her shows. I noticed that the entire time I was playing D&D I had 0 pain and the device was sitting very well. I though I may have broken it in and was on the road to longer term lockups. However, around 3:00 this morning I noticed an agonizing burning sensation right where my scrotum and the ring situate against each other.

I went to the restroom, peed, and applied a GENEROUS amount of lubrication, but the burning continued. I decided to try and ice it with a freezer pack to numb the sensation and stop the attempt at an erection that was tugging on the ring causing the pain, but it still took over an hour and a half before my penis calmed down and the burn subsided.

This morning has been a mixed bag. Sometimes the ring settles into just the right spot and I forget I even have a cage on; but other times it strays just slightly into a more tender area and my scrotum is on fire.

I haven't said anything to Madam because the pain is manageable, but I think tonight I may ask for a 24 hour break to let everything breath and rest a bit. Our new sex toys should be in some time this afternoon and her period is pretty much over, although she is still very moody, so hopefully she will have enough incentive to let me free so I can try our new cock extender with her.

My ideal night would be she comes home from work, lets me out of my cage, we warm each other up with the Magic Wand and a little punishment for asking to have my cage removed. Then she has me strap on the cock extender to really bring her over the edge. After she is finished with me she lets me use the magic wand to either have a ruined orgasm or if she is VERY generous actually finish properly with the wand. There is a good chance what will actually happen though is she will come home and be exhausted from working a late shift and I will have to wait to pleasure her till tomorrow evening.

Any way I really hope this burning is something that subsides with time and building up some tougher skin because I love being caged but last night was pretty rough.

See You Space Cowboy...

 

[Ashe]

Day 4 Update - 3/2/18

At work right now, 1 hour left on my shift before I get to head home! The last 4 hours or so have been totally pain free, but I don't know why. I can still sense some tenderness around my ring but there hasn't been any burning sensation despite a few attempted boners flaring up.

I hope that it stays this way and I don't have to take my cage off tonight, but if I start noticing any kind of burning sensation before bed, even if it is slight, I think I will request Madam take the cage off for the night and give me a day to recover before we go back in on a longer stent.

That said I should really count myself lucky. This is only day 4 and I have already been able to wear it overnight twice as well as breaking well past the 24 hour barrier. (I will be at 48 hours tonight at 10 if I don't start feeling a burn again) All this from a OSFA Chinese cage! Meanwhile there are guys with custom devices who still can't wear them overnight.

I really can't wait to feel the Magic Wand tonight! hopefully Madam will let me use it and doesn't come home too wiped out.

 

[RexVa]

I told her that before I hand her the keys to her cock I had three conditions that absolutely had to be met

suggest -...] what you desire

Hopefully she will redirect this frustration into [fun?] punishment later

My ideal night would be she comes home from work, lets me out of my cage, we warm each other up with the Magic Wand and a little [fun?] punishment

Anyone who is a serial masturbator, who, by virtue of his selfish actions, is gravely disrespecting his wife for so long, should be encouraged and supported to try and stop that practice and begin to show care, obedience and respect to the woman who stands by him.

But demanding that she play game of "chastity", especially when this was not her idea as a conservatively raised person--and, given the comments above, that appear to be just a lot of topping her from the bottom--it all unfortunately looks like a porn-replacement kinky fantasy play for him, than a sincere attempt at true submission and a display of honor and reverence for her.

I hope this thread proves me wrong.

 

[Ashe]

Day 5 - 3/4/18

So last night we had to take the cage off as we noticed some redness and swelling. Madam was also extremely tired from her shift at work but that didn't stop me from busting out the Hitachi for the first time. To massage her back, neck, and feet. Nothing sexual but she REALLY enjoyed it and I was just happy to be there for her.

As for today, What a day. Madam had to work this morning and afternoon so I took our son to see his grandparents and spent some time with the family. He just had an awesome time. His grandma even offered to keep him overnight for us. This meant that Madam and I were able to have our first proper date night in a while. We went to the mall and did some shopping including a trip to Victoria's Secret. She bought a new bra and some panties leaving me standing there surrounded by dozens of images of half naked women. It was torture since at this point I haven't masturbated in well over a week.

After shopping and grabbing a bite to eat we came home for the night. Madam laid down on the bed and told me to get out the Magic Wand. I got so excited and started thinking about all the fun we were about to have. Then she commanded I use it on her feet and back again. Of course I put up no resistance and gave her a solid hour of massage with the powerful toy. She then took it from me and placed it right under the head of my penis. I felt vibrations echoing all throughout my body and just before I lost myself to the pleasure she turned it off and told me she was going to bed. She handed me my cock ring and said to put it on but leave the cage off so it doesn't rub too much while I am still healing.

So yeah pretty good night all things considered. I had hoped for some more intimate fun, but this isn't about what I want. It is about her.

 

[Ashe]

... demanding that she play game of "chastity", especially when this was not her idea as a conservatively raised person--and, given the comments above, that appear to be just a lot of topping her from the bottom--it all unfortunately looks like a porn-replacement kinky fantasy play for him, than a sincere attempt at true submission and a display of honor and reverence for her.

I hope this thread proves me wrong.

I am sorry but what part of this thread says I "forced" her to play the game of chastity? Also at which point did I start topping from the bottom, was it when I HOPED for something to happen? (PS It didn't instead I spent a good portion of my night simply massaging her sore feat and back.)

I mentioned the idea of chastity to Madam and while she wasn't instantly receptive she was the one who told me to order the cage. Also, just because I HOPE that we will have a night of fun doesn't mean I won't respect whatever decision Madam makes, nor does it mean I have told her that it is what I want. This journal is my personal thoughts throughout our journey. However, every conversation I have had with madam since we agreed to travel down this road together has been simply me reinforcing that I want to be present for her and however she feels is not only okay but correct.

Tonight we had our first date night in a LONG time and I VERY VERY much hoped that it would result in some fun in the bedroom. However, she had worked a full day before we went on our date and when we got home she was wiped out. I gave her a foot and back massage with our new Magic Wand, and she teased me a little with it. However, we didn't even come close to sex. She could sense I was disappointed and apologized to me, at which point I said. "Madam I appreciate that you care about how I feel, but don't feel like this is something you need to apologize for. I am on your schedule whatever that may be."

I really suggest you go back and read what has actually been said in this journal because hoping for something doesn't mean I then tried to force anything on my Madam. You just come across as needlessly aggressive.

 

[guest 2942]

Anyone who is a serial masturbator, who, by virtue of his selfish actions, is gravely disrespecting his wife for so long, should be encouraged and supported to try and stop that practice and begin to show care, obedience and respect to the woman who stands by him.

completely agree with you here.

But demanding that she play game of "chastity", especially when this was not her idea as a conservatively raised person--and, given the comments above, that appear to be just a lot of topping her from the bottom--it all unfortunately looks like a porn-replacement kinky fantasy play for him, than a sincere attempt at true submission and a display of honor and reverence for her.

All I seen was some hopes and desires from him, no disrespect. As chaste males our hopes and desires are what motivate us to be the person we should be.

 

[RexVa]

at which point did I start topping from the bottom?

:

I first mentioned the idea of full time chastity to my wife she laughed

my wife [...] agreed to lock me

I needed to kill the cycle

she has shown me that she is willing [...]

If I ever say this she understands we must stop

Third, she must understand that

In short I want her to work her way up to being a full on Dom

I really want her to go even longer

I think I prefer this though. I am helpless and it just makes it that much dirtier

I suggest that later that night we should take the device off

Madam almost gave up on the entire idea of locking me up it was so frustrating.

No aggression from me, just best wishes and a reminder that this should be about her and what she needs and wants.