BTW rshcultz00, I read some of your other posts on this subject and it seems that things are improving for you yes?
What you describe above with your wife is miles better than her not being interested. She sounds like she is much more interested in the power exchange now.
Excellent news I think. Keep us posted.
subklik
sk
I really can't figure my wife out honestly.
After the blow up, I tried giving her space for a few days. Then we went to lunch together and afterwards I apologized for my annoying behavior and told her that I appreciated her feedback. She said that now I was acting too much like a robot and keeping her distant and she didn't like that either. I told her I would improve and try to find the happy medium to please her.
Cut to ... this weekend. We had to go out of town Sat morning so she handed me the key and said she didn't want to have me travelling with it. After two and a half weeks of lock up, I wasn't about to argue with her.
Saturday night after a few drinks, we were talking and she said that she was starting to see why rules made things better as I wouldn't have any confusion or need to ask about things. I agreed that it does create problems when I don't have clear direction. One thing she wanted to put into effect immediately was that when she lets me out from now on, she will tell me when she expects me back in and I should comply.
I said I would but it raised another point which is what happens if I don't comply. She was positively beaming as she said to me "well we do have that whip (it's actually a crop - not a whip, but whatever) at home and I've been warming to the idea of using it. You know I used to ride and really know how to use it."
I told her that I wouldn't want to be cropped, so as a deterrent, it is very effective. The more I thought about it, I'm actually a bit ashamed that I said that though. It's very selfish of me to think that way after she has been so loving to put up with my chastity fetish.
It really seems that she is itching to use the crop (based on this comment and other drunken comments / conversations) and I shouldn't make her feel guilty if she wants to. The problem is that I *really* don't want this although at times I wish she would - in spite of my wishes - to help solidify her authority over me.
I think tomorrow I am going to tell her that I am sorry for my response and explain my difficulty in properly submitting. I will let her know that I trust her judgment as to whether or not she thinks she needs to use it on me - or if she simply wants to use it on me to satisfy some craving of her own.
(As a side note, during our conversation, she told me that she really enjoys knowing that I am suffering for her.)
So ... all the problems (unsurprisingly) stem from metrying to control the situation and stifling her. It's hard to really let go though and submit properly. The longer I'm in the device, the easier it gets though.
(sorry this is going on)
Tonight after I re-locked myself per her orders, I couldn't help staring at her from time to time and telling her how beautiful she is. Inside I somewhat curse myself for sounding like a fool but she had this amazing smile on her face each time - I believe in big part because she is amused at my growing horniness and love (lust?) sickness for her.
I want her so bad right now ... she did let me massage her legs and told me that she enjoyed my attention. It made me extremely happy to please her.
