In at the Deep End

Beginning to think @Jasmic68 that I was built to be a male dom/keyholder not a sub. Not that there's really a market for them either! My penis and personality seem to be rebelling against me.

Anyhow - Considering options - Both in terms of keyholders and other relationships.

[Still so coy...]

 

Agreed. I've already pushed my budget in this area (twice). But part time chastity only has limited appeal to me. It seems to miss the point and start to feel like hard work - especially when these things are not easy to fit.

Having said that I have been unlocked since last night and so far having a clear schedule and full access has not caused a problem. Maybe its the distance since last time, or a desire not to break the run.

Nearly said streak - but that brings to mind quite a different chastity challenge - particularly after last night.

 

So, I gave up.

There was no chance of anything working. And I have eight pages worth of Vault post to prove that.

With nothing better to do with my Sunday afternoon I toyed around with The Vice and the settings I last had it on. There was no way that spacer was going to go all the way down.

Until it did.

The ring feels tight and is burning a little. But I don't care. That was probably about four hours ago now and the device is still holding on fine.

One last ditch hope?

I have some lubricant (which came free from Uberkinky with another order) but have yet to try it I want this device to stay on. (At least for now.)

Tonight also entails the regular trip to the pub. C shows up. And it shouldn't be surprising by now that I have to sit very carefully in order to be comfortable. But on arrival home the device shows no sign of budging.

This is when my brain a few beers down and slightly giddy from having a chastity device that is still working and a couple of compliments whilst out ... - dutch courage kicks in.

Key goes in new combination lock safe (whilst the other is still locked in my old one). Emlalock open and loaded. My desire to try the service still unabated. Sense prevails and I pick a locking period of only 1 day 8 hours. Something manageable - where I won't have to go into work.

Success. (Even if I know that this may realistically still only be a one off.)

Then a try out the friendlink. But not like in my test run last night using a non-logged in browser. So now I've almost doubled my time to get out.

Had better be careful. But still. One final time - lets hope this works. I may not have to give up after all.

 

Opps. It wasn't me clicking on the link that added the time. It was because I hadn't quite deactivated the ability for other on the site to add in time in the way that I thought I had... .

 

Up and showered. And everything is still fitting. My right testicle is fine whilst my lest is still angry. It's not unbearable but sore. In the past the whole of my ball sac has felt like this in a morning and the sensations have mostly gone by lunchtime.

Today I'm planning on being out of the house till at least midday and do not have easy access to any key. Of course I could use my emergency password for Emlalock - but this isn't a real emergency, is it. Having said that I am a little worried that if my left ball slips I could end up having to cope for sometime before being able to get release. That's not going to happen though right? Instead its going to get used to living with the cage and stretch just enough so I can live comfortably.

This would probably be good as unless I want to register my first session as failed I'm currently locked in for the next five days subject to changes. Though even if I unlock from this (and use the honour system or other) I'm still chaste till at least 2 March. Still hoping that this might mark a change of direction on this thread. So far it seems like I've written endless reams on failed fittlngs noting the minutiae of every collapse. Maybe now I can catch up elsewhere on the Mansion and list the benefits and disadvantages of the devices in the reviews, and, simply try living the lifestyle.

Without a (live-in) keyholder I'm not sure how much there would be too say. But just because I'm successfully locked it doesn't necessarily mean that the story is over. Looking at my body locked in the device I think its noticeable that from tomorrow it will be two weeks since I last had any release.

I need to get dressed and go out...

 

Small victories.

I had to refit the device once - fortunately I'd ticked the hygiene removal option before starting. (Which gives you a limited time to wash and correct at the risk of incurring a fine for not proving you are locked back up in time.) Purists would probably scream at this option because it allows for cheating and (semi-)easy access to unlock but without it I would have had a failed session by now. Somewhere during the day my left testicle had escaped which, I guess, explains why it was starting to feel a lot more comfortable.

Had I known that that the voters on Emlalock were going to be kind to me I could probably have lasted without opening the safe as The Vice was (for once) hanging on nicely by one testicle. However, the clock was at the time showing something like five days and I wanted my body to have settled in to being in the device before heading out for the train this morning (hoping for a more comfortable ride than in the past). It seemed much more likely to increase my chance of survival in the device for the coming day.

However short I can now claim to have finished a session in chastity - it only took just over a month and a half! The good news then is it is possible. The bad news is that I still have testicle trouble. I've tried the next ring size down to try and push everything up and out a bit - but at the moment that's looking like a step too far.

The only change i opted for in the last refit was re-adding the anti-pullout (small size). It took me a while to realize this morning that it might be one of the reasons my erection was being 'awkward' inside the cage pulling everything down onto my testicles. The problem was I hadn't even realized I was having an erection, just ball pain. But feeling at the top of the cage I could feel a nice thick erection. One to be proud of should I have been unlocked...(!) but the The Vice was clamping it down to the side of my body. Being pushed down the bottom part of the anti-pullout (which holds on from outside the cage) was pressing onto my testicles. (I'm still not sure if this was part of the design or an additional accidental discouragement the designers lucked upon.)

What next?

I still don't know if I can get away with daily use of this device (or any) whilst at work. As being able to retreat and fix things is much more difficult it not at times impossible. It would be tempting to see if my body has moulded itself any better to the shape of the Steel Pod but that also comes with the problems of being bulky and perhaps harder to hide in work clothing. Awkward when you don't get to spend your day hiding in the back.

Maybe I'll just have to stick to using devices in the evenings and weekends. Maybe I will have to save up for a (good quality) full belt and use self-control for a while. What I do know though is that there is still some life and worth in trying the devices I have for a little bit longer - but only if I can see and/or feel some give in my tricky testicle. If I could get that to reshape itself then my possibilities might suddenly open up. At the moment however it still has the unfortunate tendency (unlike its neighbour) or wanting to climb through the ring rather than drop down and hang nicely in front of it.

 

Second attempt - striking whilst the iron is hot. This time it is Emlalock again with the release method set to "beat record". That should still be less than 1 1/2 days though so nothing big. It's frustrating to build up time periods so slowly but better than doing myself damage. Also this time I haven't turned on the hygiene setting so the only way out is when the session ends. I've also set the time remaining to "temperature control" to try and a bit more realism/jeopardy. The 'reading' for time to release is showing as "very cold".

The biggest difference in today's lock up is that I'm not using the Vice but back in the Seed Pod, my original device. So far its good news in that everything seems to be fitting a lot easier than it did before. But its still far to early days (hours?) to wonder how secure it will be to wear throughout the session.

The biggest difference being back in the Seed Pod is that its a weighty stainless steel device. Even those yesterdays and todays lock up are essentially very similar the feeling of being locked in the Pod is far more psychological dominating than my plastic alternatives. Maybe its because the Pod would be far harder to break if anything went wrong. But I think, in reality, there is also the thought of getting caught in it. Should there be an accident, or having to change around others. There just seems a much higher degree of kink to it... .That and the fact that being the Pod it encapsulates both the penis and testicles. There is a much greater sense of isolation (from your member) in this compared with any other device I've tried.

March is still a long while away but whilst waiting can I make it 2 out of 2 successful sessions in a chastity device? We can only hope.

 

Apologies for the rapid double post. But have kept meaning to update about the events of a couple of days ago with the full chastity belt.

Having taken the device off the first time I could feel an itch on parts of my buttocks and side. At first I just put this down to general weirdness of maybe even a psychological problem(...!) but then I realised the places it was ocurring was wear my skin had met the belt. On the side, the top of the buttocks... I hadn't noticed whilst wearing but after taking it off there was a little irritation. I don't think that this is down to any kind of intolerance to the belt but that the movement of it against my skin is causing friction. If you ever think of buying a full belt is well worth paying the money for a good one. This is the cheapest I could find to try and you can easily tell in its build quality.

I wouldn't recommend that anybody buy this product. Even if you could get it to fit properly you'd probably quickly move on to soemthing better. Basically I assume that most people if they are considering buying a full belt know what they are doing and that they are going to commit to it for a while. The one I've been looking at weighs in at over £700. But you really do get what you pay for. Will I get a full belt? I don't know. If I was in a committed relationship with someone and they were happy to be my keyholder - then yes in a heartbeat (so long as we could afford it...). Would I want to be locked into 24/7? I'm not so sure. I like the idea of submissive play and tease and would trust a long term partner to have control. But I'm not sure I'm that much of a sub. I certainly wouldn't want to lock her (by my choice alone...). It's weird, being currently out of a relationship I can see its benefits. But being in one, which I hope to soon be, I think that I've said before(!) but I'm not particularly one to get horny/erotic dreams. But my 'current' thoughts of my rleational future are definitely not in chastity.

But I digress. The belt don't buy it. Either save your money for soemting better (and you probably know if you want a full belt or not without trialling a baby version). Or stick a less expensive and probably better value cock cage whilst you wait. If you're a house husband or a have a very sedantary lifesstyle then this belt 'might' work for you. But it isn't designed to be used with any degree of movement. To some, its very cheapness could add to its alure (though I'm not sure in this context that that is the right word.) A lot of the devices that I have such as the Seed Pod which I'm wearing now smack of quality and ignoring the kinky side for the moment they appear to be of very good quality. Where as the full belt was nasty and cheap. Rough around the edges and made to fit form and function rather than build quality. If you have a sub whol likes the finer things in life then sticking him in this might teach them a lesson. It's purely psychological, I know, but it somehow felt a lot more wrong wearing this belt than any of the other devices - purely because it cheapness made the situation look/feel out of control. I'm not sure how well I'm explaining this - but had I been caught wearing the belt this seemingly thrown together device would be a lot harder to explain away than someting precision made or sculpted plastic. Its the sort of thing that nobody would lock themselves in by choice; would they?

My final decision to stop using the belt came the day after the toilet debacle. Where I had to remove the device (I can only assume this is when it happened) has left a big bruise and broken the skin. All the way along the left side of my body around/above the hips. There was no blood but 2 (3?) days on I can still feel it now and if I was to rub/scrape against it some skin might fall off. Having taken a closer look I probably got away with it fairly well. But it definitely doesn't encourage me to put myself back in the device. Fortunately I don't have to.

 

Thanks Jasmic68 - Sorry I came across that way, I don't think that househusbands have a sedentrary lifestyle but when I was one for a while I did far far far less moving around than I have to do now and in other roles (though that might be individual to me). As such I think wearing the belt would have been possible for me then. Although only at times I knew I wasn't going to be spring cleaning the whole house in a day or training for a marathon... if you get my drift. Apologies for any confusion.

As to future partners and keyholding I don't think 'she' would be into it all. The expectation would be on the lines of: You're a grown up, you don't have to have it locked away to be responsible. I'd expect you to do that anyway because you love me. Personally, right now, I'd also choose her over chastity (well being locked up) if the choice was there.

Having said that I can imagine that if we were settled into a relationship and the subject of chastity came up she wouldn't be averse to a bit of kinky play. Would probably enjoy too mentally teasing me just beyond the limits of what she would expect I could cope with. Just as offering to play lock up over the weekend. But then smililing and claiming she'd never give me the key ever again on the Monday... Mind games not reality. But that's why I like her. Incredibly bright and caring but still able to play and laugh.

I need to make sure I'm out of this cage by Saturday when we're spending the eveing together (... with others ...). I remember that last time I wore it down the pub in her company proved a very uncomfortable experience. I was reminded of that again this morning when my penis tried repeatedly (and in quick succession!) to get erect - it felt almost as it someone was masturbating me, but could only have been my body adjusting around the cage as my penis tried to thrust. It was not an experience I want to repeat.

The nearest I've come to a similar experience was a stint overnight in the Kalis Teeth and there felt a similar amount of restriction around my sides. But whereas the Kali is an open device this one was pushing in on me too. The extra nub on the 'lid' of the devices which closes down the opening hole really makes a differnece when penis and testicles are both threaded through inside.

By the way I realize it is probably bad form to remove a device purely because I'm planning on spending the evening with a lady who would otherwise cause me to have a long an uncomfortable night due to (ironically) a long and uncomfortable erection. But the evening is part of a Burns Night celebration and as such I will be expected to take part in a number of vigrous and fast dances. There is also some contact (though probably not with that organ... .) The chances of doing myself an injury therefore seem to be high. That and if there is any potential I don't want anything to get in the way.

As to the Seed Pod now - well it has never hung on (and I mean hung quite literally) bettter. I was slightly worried at times over night when the weight of the device brought it down between my legs but still no obvious sign of escape. I still also remember the time it fell off into the tolilet bowl whilst I was sitting down - another incident I'm keen not to repeat. But so far so good. I am wondering - thought I have no proof of this - if I have tricked my 'dodgy' testicle. As in it usually tries to find its way up and out of any ball trap device that I wear. As this device is designed quite differently to the others, I wonder if it tried to work its way out as usual but found itself squeezing into the inner locking section of the cage rather than out of it? Either way I think the device is okay to wear for a while longer. Will have to see what happens on a train or dressed for work.

Speaking of which. Although its tempting to work from home today I really ought to go in.

 

Well today got interesting fast.

It started when Emlalock refused to let me into the website saying that I did not have the right email address and/or password. But having sole use of my laptop (the computer one, silly...) I decided to let my browser save the password.

What the...

Then a few screen refreshes and retries later I finally got in. But the system told me that there was no active session and therefore no combination lock file to recover. The session should have finished later tonight but now it looked like I was going to have to try and beat a four digit combination look secured into an awkward part of my wardrobe.

Had someone hacked my account? Was this some kind of comedy terrorism by a twelve year old computer geek bent on making mischief...? I spent most of today not knowing if or when I was going to escape from the Pod. After all four digits of combination lock is probably going to need quite a large part of my free time - which I currently don't have.

I fired off an email to Emlalock in the morning and have just found an email from the team explaining that their site server crashed last night and must have taken the details of my session with it... . This fits and does explain the one clue I did have that all was not what it seemed: The session was gone but my statistics on the site still said that no session had been terminated (and only showed the cumulative locked time from my previous and only prior session).

Dustin, has told me that if I can give him a definite time of locking he will go back to try and find the uploaded combination lock picture. I know that I started using the site on my PC at 20:45 last night so can be fairly confident that I upload the photo from my phone (cutting out the middle man) just before.

Let's hope he can find it otherwise I'm going to have to revert back to a previous career of mine and see if I can recover the photo from the 'deleted' bowels of my phone. Either that or start trying the 10,000 possibilities of the combination lock one by one.

Maybe I won't now be out by Saturday evening as the Pod is now proving amazing resilient in keeping me contained (I'll have to put it down to the other devices helping to reshape my body), even after a day and night on the move with it hanging from my waist not even my penis has started to escape/pull out. Still at least its a better thought than someone deliberately hacking the account and sabotaging the photo for their own kicks.

As I say - Interesting day.

 

It's alleged to be Chinese in origin - but nobody has ever provided the source.

 

Depending on your point of view on permanent male chastity: the good news it that I have by penis back.

Dustin from Emlalock support was brilliant and told with my queries quickly and efficiently. What makes this even more commendable is that Emlalock is a free service which operates without ad-support. I have nothing but good things to say about them despite the fact that I was victim of their first server crash in three years. If he hadn't got back so soon I imagine I could be quite worried by now as to what was going on and having a very laborious time trying to crack the safe.

Removing the cage (I very nearly kept it on) my testicles were feeling very battered but with a little massaging they feel like they're getting back to normal. Having said that I still don't think I've found the best way to secure them with the leather strap which stays inside the device. In a lot of the photos (from the supplier) its not just the balls but the penis too is strapped. I'm not sure how this works though as penises seem determined to vary in size - so what is at one point secure could soon be very loose. Time for more trial and error I suppose.

Oh, and being time to remove the device this gave me a chance to do a little research just before I unlocked I tried to remove the device without the keys. No joy at all. Although they had jiggled around a bit inside the device my testicles were far to big to get through the (now) smaller closed hole - this might have something to do with the previous fortnight of abstinence before being locked in. My penis also felt trapped too alongside helping keeping everything else inside. I think that I might - although I didn't try - have been able to have been able to remove my penis from the Pod had I really tried but there would have been no going back in and with testicles still clamped inside that probably would not have been a good move. So I'm very happy that, unlike in previous attempts at wearing the device, my penis is still trying to stay in even when the device works itself away form my body and tries to dangle looser.

Anyway that's enough specifics for now. Somehow after very nearly stopping it seems to be coming together. But will have to try and repeat these results before I speak too soon. Though I have now completed two separate 32 hour stints in two different devices and the Seed Pod is looking like it could be escape proof.

 

Definitely. You'd think that a website would be safer than a random Dom (no offence to any here... - don't hurt me!) that I've never met. But it was always in the back of my mind that it "could" go down either temporarily or forever at any time. Slightly more alarming being first locked out and then finding the code gone - didn't think they had an optional 'hacking scenario' setting!

Still when you remove yourself access to the key you take these risks. On this occasion I sacrificed a back up key for combination lock scrabbling and almost had to live with the consequences.

Just one more time for the record and I've not been asked to say this (and I only mention because their support was so good): Emlalock is free, There are no adverts, in my experience there customer service has been impeccable - just make sure your confident of exactly what settings are checked and unchecked before you start a session (especially others voting rights).

In fact I've trusted the site enough to let them hold my keys again this time to an hour before the dance on Saturday night. So pretty much 48 hours in the Seed Pod await me. Glad I've now worked ought how to make it fit a little closer to the body. Though definitely don't want that much metal flying around my groin whilst I'm being "made" to Scottish dance.

 

Okay full disclosure and/or the updated story:

Since posting the above around about 15 minutes ago I've checked the email account I solely use for chastity websites (to avoid prying eyes and interesting conversations with people who 'borrow' my smartphone. Dustin has offered me free premium services in compensation for the server downage. Which I decided to accept - but also sent him a link to my last post (above) to return the favour.

What I haven't mentioned to him is that I'll try and use this free period to do as fair a test of the full range of features as I can in the time available and post the results somewhere in the review section on CM. I know the site (Emlalock) gets mentioned a lot in posts - but I think our reviews are currently limited to devices. Either way it wouldn't hurt to have another.

The one thing I might find difficult to test for the time being is the remote keyholder option as so far the settings others have "volunteered" on the site tend to be a little excessive/risky for my tastes. Though if I get through to Saturday evening without any significant ball pain it would probably be safe to try something.

Tis a pity, have a married friend in Wales who is was really into 50 Shades and that ilk before it became popular. I'd better she'd love to be a keyholder even in a non-sexualised way. However - that open up far far far too many awkward possibilities. (Her husband finding out and not "getting" it being the most obvious.

Anyhow. Been looking for a new direction to take this thread seeing as devices finally(!) seem to be becoming possible to weary, and, I can drop the fairly whiny, relents 'it isn't working' posts which some of you (if you're reading this now) must have been bored enough to sit through.

So, play with Emlalock, try out some of the less vanilla and premium options, and keep an eye on the keyholder sessions. If I can find one which fits and doesn't leave me potentially locked for all eternity. (I'm still working my way out of the little and often category - having had far too many close scrapes). I'll give it a try.

Ah, I think my Welsh friend would be an evil keyholder - still it will never be and she knows far too many of my secrets.

 

Possible "to wear" even. (To think I thought I had 'checked' this for grammar/spelling before posting - It's horrendous; Sorry.)

[Oh and the friend reads some pretty down and dirty BDSM based fan fic - she sent me some once...]

 

In another (more appropriate part of this forum I have just asked the users if they can suggest some suitable Emlalock settings in order to test out its full range.

I won't be surprised if nobody gets back to me on that post/thread but it seemed worth a shot. Either that or I probably have to work out exactly how I want to punish myself ... .... ...

Very much of the mindset currently that I should push any door to see if it opens. Then, if I end the lock up period; and nobody responds, then I haven't really lost anything as all, Have I?

 

Was growing in confidence today with the Seed Pod and was almost tempted to leave it on tomorrow for the dance. Then carried by the weight of the steel it slipped out of the bottom of my boxer briefs. Can't imagine that being pleasant in the middle of a Highland Fling.

Intriguingly it stayed on despite the sudden pull. Then again if it didn't tomorrow I'm not sure how I'd start explaining the lump of metal and padlock that suddenly came clattering out of my trouser leg.

Evening off would be best tomorrow, perhaps.

 

Early this morning I think that my member could have won the penis Olympics. It's been over a day (and night) now that it has had a heavy lump of stainless steel encasing it. But I awoke this morning to find "it" doing a spot of weightlifting - incredible hulk style.

Last night when I had an erection the device stayed in place near the bone and the swelling when met with the (reduced) inner ring prevented any of kind of release or pleasure. The design of the cage is quite large (as it hold both the penis and testicles so some would say it allows too much growth. However, as a second inner ring closes in over the penis - and reduces the size of the original hole - anattempt to get erect is quickly met with discomfort and a desire to shrink. Worse than in other devices when I have physically filled the cage. In 'those' devices it would have been nice to find a keyholder(?)/someone(!?) to show it off too. In the Seed Pod I just want it to go back down.

This morning however the device was pulling away and a lot of my penis length was exposed - and without adding too much detail - I could tell it was happy with what it was doing. Leaving the device to try and sort itself out when I became flaccid didn't seem like much of an option so I had two real choices: Try and stuff everything back in, or force it out. Seeing as I couldn't yet hear anyone else moving in the house I figured I had at least 10 hours to go before I could get the key back and had planned lots of physical house work to do today - so really didn't want to be in pain every time I bent over. [Stop making up your own jokes at the back.]

Pushing everything back in seemed to be difficult as although I could get force everything back in through the first opening the second is now locked by behind bars so I could only attempt to wriggle my body back in through it (which is ironically something you could only attempt when hard.) The other problem though was that my testicles were now filling the space where my penis once was but although now having additional room to come out were refusing to do so - which also answered my alternative question about pulling everything out.

The way I see it now (well technically feel) is that my penis is only now in the outer chamber which means any erection may try and pull the device off. This is okay when I am awake due to the way the device sits when I am going about my day. But asleep it's a different story and if this device is going to be suitable for long term wear - then it really ought to be. I did wonder if when I next fit the cage I need to do it at night and allow myself to have a massive erection before locking it (no release - obviously) therefore ensuring that all flesh and skin where as far in as possible before closing the door and lock.

Without applying too much force I did try and go the other way today and stretch my penis out of the cage. It did appear to be still stuck through and I could pull through length but not the tip. But as I said before - I'm not sure what I would have done had the worked as I'd then have trapped testicles and what would seem to be a heavy, bulky, ball weight that had already slipped from my underwear at least once. So I would have had a painful time without the key and probably nowhere comfortable to position my member either without it being squashed against the wrong side of the cage.

I don't know quite what is going on now. But I feel like I am halfway in and it is comfortable. Though urinating this morning was a little tricky. None of this is too much of a problem today as I am getting released at 5pm and apart from lunch will be spending most of this time by myself. I will however have to sit down carefully during the lunch break so as not to draw attention... . But after the success of last night it does annoy me that I might have to delay the possibility of longer lock up times again. Having a steel device with lots of slits around it makes showering with it on a breeze and should keep hygiene at a good level even without removal.

I've been looking at short session with remote keyholders through Emlalock but this wouldn't be two practical if I had to keep asking for the emergency password and showing up as having thousands of failed sessions... . Then there is making sure that that the hygiene options are activated before lock up so that I can have limited time to restock and clean the device (before risking a fine in terms of added time). That however takes you back to the honour system as there is no one around to witness what happens in the time between the device opening and being locked shut again. That's only been a problem once the entire time I have been on this site but - and I wasn't using Emlalock at the time - but it would be good to reduce this possibility further or even remove it altogether. I deliberately chose this as my first device as I knew it would need very limited unlocking - so I could set and go. Whereas it was tempting to start with cheaper devices and work my way up when I was ready. I weighed up all the possibilities for quite some time mentally, before deciding to go all in.

I won't go on about it now, as this post is already getting quite long, but chastity seems to have been affecting real life events too. I had a long conversation with a female friend yesterday and there was some low key tension going on (if you know what I mean). Including some very suggestive biscuit eating talk which I wont go any further with on here but suffice to say it included talk of 'nibbling a knob biscuit' if she was offered one. (Yes they do exist.) I also knew by the end of the conversation that she had the house to herself that night and absolutely no plans.

Even being a man, I didn't seem to be reading too much into what the possibilities could be... She's good company and we often talk by messenger or in passing. But life prevents meeting up all the often. Tonight could have been an opportunity.

But. Even though I could probably be very happy with this woman she is not C who I'm spending the evening with tonight. (Though sadly with others too.) A woman who can make me howl to the moon and incapable of rational thought just by her appearance. If you want proof - then I can tell you that this is probably when it is one of the few times it is okay to think 'with your dick' not your brain. In a number of my earlier posts on here my member has rammed itself against the cage in her presence often to a considerable degree of pain. No other woman has that effect on me including the conversation yesterday.

So I passed on what seemed to have been a sure thing to pursue a greater gamble. Tonight, I won't tell her. But I hope to make things a lot more obvious that I want things to change.

Right, need to go offline or I'll not get anything done.