I won't use this post to detail our history with chastity, but it was decided late last year that my chastity will be permanent. In the months since then, I have dealt with the ebb and flow of frustration. Sometimes chastity is easy, and sometimes it is very hard. It seems to have periodic phases. I want to say that I am glad to be able to come on here and read about other couples' trials, errors, and successes with chastity. Especially couples who practice permanent or very long term chastity. I also find it helpful to read posts from female keyholders. My wife doesn't like to open up very much about sexual things, so it is nice to be able to read what women feel about chastity so I can understand my wife better. Thank you to everyone for contributing to this message board.
Your situation and mine are remarkably similar and I'm also glad to read about your chastity lifestyle too. The default position is that I'm locked-up in a MM JailBird. One of the few exceptions is airport scanners, but I've worn it to the doctors a few times when I'm not expecting "that part" to be examined. As for you, my wife does not allow penetration any more and has seriously great orgasms now she and I just concentrate on her sexual pleasure only. She just expects and receives long oral worship sessions from me. Also my wife does not really discuss sexual things much at all, the default position mentioned above arose in a conversation of a few sentences before she changed the subject. She had stated her position and that was it, take it or leave it. A difference is that my cage is not removed at all for long periods, e.g. eight weeks recently: I can keep it clean because of its design but my skin could do with a break at earlier intervals so that is something we will be working on.
Yes, similar. Early on my wife confided that she really wanted it to be permanent, and never really says anything beyond that. The few times early on when I would manipulate her into letting me have intercourse, her attitude throughout the experience was cold and resentful. She really wanted me locked up, but she's very passive and wouldn't refuse so she would just lay there hating it the whole time. I understand what you mean about devices. My wife doesn't really care what I wear as long as I stay clean. She has told me that she thinks the metal devices like jailbird look like ugly torture devices and she wouldn't want to see me wear one. I also travel a lot for work, so metal isn't very attractive. I'm strongly considering an Evotion Wearables device. All the hygiene access I would need, with the ability to go completely plastic for air travel. I could leave it on indefinitely.
@Shepherdsflock Thank you for sharing. I too am thinking of a Evotion Wearables option for very similar reasons. Thankfully, my Key Holder enjoys PIV when she lets me out. But for the most part, I stay locked up for the majority of any given month. She has become increasingly adept at teasing which is quite divine and makes the whole thing way more delicious. Good luck with your ongoing journey and keep us posted please
This August will be our first full year in a FLR, and it has gone very well I believe. I have not heard a single complaint from my KH, although she has not brought up making this a permanent way of life just yet. However, I think it could be a point of discussion in the future. And honestly, I'm not sure I see any good reason yet as to why it shouldn't be permanent. As far as frustration goes, between work, kids, and pleasing her, I don't seem to have much time or energy left for frustration. Fortunately, frustration in chastity for me seems to fairly limited, although it still sets in once in a while, usually after she has let me have a real orgasm. lol...
@JiL A year! Good for you...that seems sufficient time to test the rails on FLM for sure! I feel the same way. It is odd really, I spend all my time either working, pleasing my KH or tending to our kid but feel way more gratified than I did before when we were in our D/s dynamic and she was my sub (for 10 years). I assembled an inversion table a couple of weeks ago and still have not had a chance to try it out! I awake at 4:30am during the week for some 'me' time to meditate, journal, and do yoga. I also keep my own MC blog on Tumblr too. My KH reads that on occasion too. Happy week to you all!
My wife had some complaints at first. Mainly that I struggled with clinginess and would have moodiness occasionally. But that seems to have subsided as I have adjusted to it. It was all kind of subconscious. I did not actively feel like I needed or had to have erections or orgasms, but looking back now I can see that I was going through a form of withdrawal. I often wasn't even aware of it when I was acting like that. We actually have a new problem that I'm trying to figure out how to handle. My wife's libido has increased enough that she notices it and she is bothered by it. She spent so many years being pretty much asexual and having no feelings of arousal or sexual desire, that now that her body and mind are starting to crave it, she feels weird about it.
Hi @JiL ....love Catalina's! I am looking at one right now (used) for some river sailing where we live. The avatar pic is my dream boat...the Valiant 50!
@Shepherdsflock It seems that if you two are able to channel and guide her new awakening, it may well be an amazing outcome for your experience with MC. A Key Holder that is jazzed is fantastic to keep the energy going in my opinion. Good luck!