Deep breath. And... relax. Here goes

MyPete got back from a few days at his mum's late last night. While he's there, he 'goes free' (as we say) and he promises not to play with himself. I honestly don't think he#'d be able to look me in the eye and lie, about this kind of thing anyway.

We had a nice kiss when he arrived and chatted about this and that. Then I asked him if he'd made himself come while he was away. He said no, and was pretty pleased with his will power I think. He was just turning away to carry on with whatever, when I asked him if he'd played with himself. A bit of a pause and then he admitted that he had. I asked him how long for and he told me about an hour! He said he'd really missed being hard, and having control over when he was hard - more than he'd missed coming. I asked him if he was sure he hadn't come and he was consistent about that - he said not even close - that he'd just wanted to be hard.

I trotted out the old chestnut parental line of not being angry, just disappointed (in actual fact, i couldn't really bring myself to be either) and he looked a bit demolished. I asked him to have his shower - I said I'd keep an eye, and afterwards we'd get the cage back on. I footled around with make-up bottles and we chatted while he washed. Once he'd finished, we had a nice long kiss (CFNM!). I was pleased to see that he was excited, and very expectant! But I asked him to get the cage. At least there were no arguments about that, but as he was on his way, I just gently said to him, (deploying my 'easy authority', haha) to make sure it was 'shorty'.

MyPete has two chastity cages. The one we use normally is a nice fit but allows him the very beginning (and I do mean the very beginning) of an erection. I'd have thought hardly enough to know but apparently he can feel it. Then there's 'shorty', for special occasions, like periods of 'consequences'. It looks to me only about a centimetre shorter but seems to make all the difference because, in his words, any erection is completely 'nipped in the bud'. He says that because he can't get hard, even slightly, it alters his whole mindset and he feels sexually squished, physically and mentally. When we used it (I admit, for too long) during consequences month, we noticed that his desperation tailed off a little earlier than when he used the normal cage.

Anyway, he came back with shorty, grumbling but I said there had to be some consequences as he'd broken the trust. It wasn't as if he'd just naturally got a bit hard - he'd kept himself that way for an hour! He looked forlorn and I realised he thought that 'consequences' meant another month!! I reassured him that it wouldn't be more than a few days and his look of relief was wonderful to see. It took some wrangling to get it on while I waited patiently with the key (he is still not allowed to touch that). As I locked him, I said 'just a few days - or a week at most'. He couldn't tell if I was joking or not. Neither could I, really.

This morning before he woke up, I placed the cane in the corner of the bedroom so he'd see it before he went to work. It doesn't really do anything for me, I'm afraid, nor him, I think, so I have no intention of using it but he won't know that. He's texted me twice today to ask if I'm annoyed with him. (Evil grin, easy authority!)

Sal

 

Hi @NowIveDoneIt , thanks for taking the trouble to write about this. You've made me really think! For us, control over when he can come is only part of our 'project'. I think we're both discovering that for both of us, control over when he can be hard is just as powerful. I do agree with you though that expecting to control when he can be hard when he's not in the cage is a step too far. But... what didn't feel 'right' was his apparent smugness about having essentially played with himself for an hour (that's quite a long time, in my book). I think we both knew he was goading me, as 'consequences' are quite fun for us both. I don't think I expressed this very well in my previous post. Thanks for looking out for MyPete! Sal

 

We finished mini-consequences week with such a simple thing but delightfully squirmy. We were about to go out for a pub supper with friends (including Laura and Paul, but more on that later) and had just come out of the shower. I hadn't locked him back up yet.

I think I've mentioned this before but I've always thought that the way men dangle when seen from behind is both odd and slightly funny. Talk about vulnerable-looking - it seems like such a design fault! I know MyPete is slightly self-conscious about this and once in a while I suggest he bend over with legs straight and apart and hold onto his knees while I enjoy the view and poke gentle fun or give him the odd tweak. There's no doubt about who's in control... However, he finds it physically too uncomfortable to be that way for more than a few minutes.

This time, I had a moment of inspiration and asked him to kneel on the sofa, knees nice and wide, facing (and with his hands on), the back. Physically nice and comfy, while mentally vulnerable and totally exposed. I just pulled up a chair and made him squirm a bit by genuinely finding it quite funny and then made him squirm a whole lot more by grasping/pulling at his balls. Nothing at all painful, but definitely conveying who's boss (sexually, that is). I told him that an hour or so should make up for his smugness earlier in the week. In the end it wasn't an hour but he told me afterwards it started off feeling squirmy, then very exciting and then he said he was 'in a zone' where he felt as though he had sexually surrendered himself, which became exciting again. It made me feel powerful but the whole vibe was fun rather than earnest. I think that the combination of having spent nearly a week in 'shorty' (the slightly smaller cage), then the joy of shower-time, then 45mins of 'handball' probably affected his mood for the rest of the evening.

I popped him into his usual cage before we went out.

'Handball' in that position turned out to be fun for both of us, and no equipment necessary!

Sal

 

So, MyPete and I went out last week with Lauara and Paul and a bunch of friends for a pub supper. It was all very jolly and a bit drunken, as it always feels this time of year - sort of end-of-term demob happy. I'm sorry to disappoint you, @Open2njoy, but although I almost always wear my key which is on a necklace, it's very rarely on public display. It's down there out of sight - I'm a modest girl who doesn't show that much cleavage outdoors, except on special occasions! As for Laura, she and Paul have only been using the cage for the odd day or two, I think, and although she said that when they do that she wears the key on a necklace, it was pretty cold last week and she was wearing a polo-neck - there certainly wasn't any key on show!

It was a lovely evening. All very merry and we moved around between courses and all got to chat with each other. At one point, I saw Laura and MyPete talking intently in such a way that they obviously didn't want anyone else to hear. For a minute I thought bad thoughts and remembered when they both did the Very Bad Thing, but then the evening moved on. I chatted with her Paul for a while, both alone and with others and found that he grew on me a bit. He showed a thoughtful, vulnerable side I hadn't much clocked before. And he asked me about me, which he hasn't done too much before.

Then some more wine and a long chat with Laura. Strangely enough for a boozy evening we mostly talked about work - we're both enjoying our jobs and feeling pretty lucky about that at the moment. And then, all of a sudden she switched subject and said things had got a whole lot better with her Paul since the 'reset' and that the biggest mystery to her was why it had taken her so long to make it happen. She said that for the first time in ages he's been looking at her sexually and obviously really wanting her. Being wanted has made her want him, etc, etc.

Laura said that she'd thnked MyPete for playing his part in it. She said MyPete has asked if they were 'doing the chastity thing' - she said just here and there for the odd day but what really mattered was her taking control. (Yessss!) Laura knows that for MyPete and me, we want to keep my control essentially just to our sexual activities but it seems that they're much more open to it spilling out into the rest of their lives, at least for the moment.

Then she asked me if I remembered how MyPete had felt when she was present when I examined and measured him. Of course I remember! He was beside himself with excitement and edgy squirminess. I said rather ascerbically that it had been a shame we had to stop that occasional fun beause they did the Very Bad Thing. She was contrite, as always. But then she said she'd like to give that experience to her Paul and would I be prepared, one day, no rush, to be present, as she had been with My Pete? She said that she wanted to make sure the experience for her Paul of her taking the lead was a fun one. I said I really wasn't sure (although in my giggly wino state it was a bit hard to tell what I really thought about anything) but I'd need to talk to MyPete, and surely she'd need to ask her Paul? To which she replied, she'd already done both!! Eeeek! I wasn't sure whether to be upset, or shocked, or both. She continually surprises me.

After one of his lock-ups she said she had measured her Paul and it had been both erotic and fun. She'd joked about inviting another woman to watch and he'd obviously found that simulataneoausly appealing and appalling. And earlier in the evening (when I saw them having private words) Laura had asked MyPete how he'd feel if I were to go and watch, in the way she had done with MyPete and me. She said he'd told her he'd need to talk to me about it. And then she switched the subject back to worky stuff and then there were other people in the conversation and everything moved on.

When we got home, MyPete and I lay on the bed with the room gently spinning and cuddled and chatted for a while. I had my hand on his cage - it just naturally drifts there - and we felt lovely and close. He told me about what Laura had suggested to him and asked me what I thought. I said, 'You first'. He said he didn't quite know what to think. He said that having Laura watch while I inspected and measured him was one of the most erotic experiences he'd ever had and that it didn't seem very fair that it couldn't work both ways. On the other hand, it had led to the Very Bad Thing happening and he wouldn't want that to happen again, with me and her Paul. I said that there's no way that would happen, but that didn't mean it was a good idea to say yes. I'm not at all sure whether it's something I really want to do - I don't know that I'd really enjoy it, and apart from anything else, it all seems very sudden. MyPete said that after I'd 'primed him by doing that thing on the sofa' (his words!) before we'd gone out that evening, I could ask him to agree to pretty much anything and he'd go along with it. We laughed, had a long kiss, and that's how we left it.

Sal

 

Hi @Beyondheat, thanks for writing. There was something about Laura being with us previously which was fun and almost like me having a 'coach' as I was beginning to find my way. I don't think we really analysed it at the time but if we'd thought about it more, my guess is we probably wouldn't have included her. Maybe I shouldn't have been surprised that the Very Bad Thing happened between them. I think in the cold (or at least cooler) light of day, I don't feel great about me being involved in the same way with Laura and her Paul and I think MyPete feels the same. So I think that on reflection, we're probably in a similar place to you.

Just one thing about the measuring/inspection thing. For us, this was never meant to be a comparison thing. Eeeek, no! And I hope MyPete didn't see it that way. The measurement thing all started right at the beginning of our experimentation with the cage. He had read that wearing a cage a lot might cause 'shrinkage'. We read around the subject and it seemed not to be an issue as long as it had exercise and fresh air reasonably often but rather than having him measure and check every so often, we thought it might be squirmy and fun if I did the measuring. And thanks to suggestions on this site, I make a great show of writing figures in a little notebook. (The fun-squirm factor was vastly amplified (for both of us) by having Laura there on occasion). But the only comparison was with himself. (MyPete is perfectly well proportioned but I am careful to play extremely gently (although he's once or twice asked for me to be more explicit) about size because I know it's a male obsession.)

Thanks again for writing. I think that anyway we'd have been quite careful about having me do with them what Laura did with us, but you've caused me to think even more carefully! As for involving both MyPete and herPaul at the same time, that is way out of bounds, even beyond fantasy land, for oh-so-many reasons, despite the wishes of some on this site!

Sal